What Do You Do When You Love Two People? suggest me your relationship advice

[gilizzy 0]

What do yuo do when your stuck between two people?.. two people you love all to much and know it would brake your heart to see them cry and it would brake their heart to see you with any one but them.. im lost and help less at this moment.. Pleas help me...

Hey, Cody. I know how you feel; I'm actually in that kind of situation right now. Only I'm one of the two guys. I'll tell you what she did, though. She told both of us that because she was at the point where she was unsure, that neither of us must be the right person. I agree. I know it's hard, especially when you love them SO much, but I believe it's the right thing to do. Also, depending on their reactions, you could gain insight on their personalities, too. And no matter who you're with, one or both of them will be uncomfortable. It's up to them to be able to move on and realize that if they truly love you, then they'll want your happiness. What makes you happy. That's what it's about. And it's ok to feel unsure; it comes with the whole dating thing. You're fine, it's normal, and you'll be ok. You seem like a caring enough person to be able to succeed with whatever makes you happy. Good luck.

[iGuest 3]

What do you do when you love two people and have kids with them both? HELP! *Long*What Do You Do When You Love Two People?

Ok, I know its hard enough when you love two people, but what I am in seems to be more complex. First let me say I am a 28 year old male. I love two people of whom I have a boy each with. One is 23, and we have a 3 year old son - I have known her for 7 years. The other is 22, I have known her for about 5 years, and we have a 2 year old boy. Let me say my feelings are the least important to me. I love the two more then anything, except for my two sons. In turn, I know they love me more then anything, and would do anything for me. It HURTS because I do not know who to "commit" to, and it upsets them both that I am not only theirs. They both know my love for each other. The 22 year old seems to have more in common with me, and there is a "passion" there that is not the same with the other. The negatives are when we fight, it can be VERY bad, and we haven't had sex in a very long time (over 10 months), but sexual thing have happened. The 23 year old doesn't seem to make me as mad, and arguments are not frequent or severe, and she seems to be more sexually driven like myself. They both like I said try to be nice to me and do anything they can for me, but both want me to be with them, and them only. I would say both have been more understanding then I could ever imagine. I am torn because I want whats best for #1 my kids #2 them, and lastly myself. I don't know how to choose, because I do love them both, and they both love me in their own unique way. It is further confusing, because even though both kids will ALWAY be loved, one will have to be in a "broken family" so to speak. And how do you pick which one, and hurt the woman and deprive the one son seeing their mom and dad together in the same house? Things get worse...

There was a tradgic accident where the 23 year old was a victim of an accidental discharge by myself. I purchased a firearm from an individual. The firearm sat around for months up high, when bringing the firearm down it dropped and went off (I did not know the firearm was loaded apparently it was when purchased) and hit her in the stomach, destroying a kidney and parts of her intestine. She had a 1 in 20 chance of surviving, and did so. First, I do not want to hear "I should have done this or that" or anything of that nature. I am on anti-depressants and struggled with wanting to live I was so full of guilt. Thank God she is okay now (this was 9 months ago about now). I have heard people say "that happened, and she still loves you/wants to be with you you should marry her" And I do consider this every day... The other girl (22 yr. Old) has stuck through this all, and plenty of other things as well though. I admit, I have gone "back and forth" between the two, when things got bad with one, thus further complicating things. Another thing I thing about is family. The 23 yr. Old's family (rightly so) HATES me due to what happened. I wish this day I would have been hurt in the accident... But family-wise, the 22 yr. Olds family likes me alot more and is understanding - I could visit them and "hang out" with her family and not feel uncomfortable. The 23 year old's I couldn't even be around any of them which I understand... Isn't thins confusing? Any help would be appriciated!

-question by Mark

[iGuest 3]

i was one of the two girls!!!!What Do You Do When You Love Two People?

I was in that situation I was involved with a guy who had a girl it started off as innocent fun talking, texting, staring it was supposed to be a friendship but we both ended up catch feelings I never got involved with him physically but he never tried either so that may me wonder even more I was thinking like if he could wait on me I could wait on him but really I was'nt facing reality I mean dude would sit on the phone with me for hours we spent valentines day and night together I just thought he would end up with me but eventually I got tired of being number 2 and I told him I wanted him and his girl to be happy and they could without me it hurts me till this day I love him so much and I know I did what is right so my advice is too just be real with them both or at least one and if one leaves and you feel like you made the wrong choice than you know who you really loved all along I hope he realizes that

-reply by mekhi veta

[iGuest 3]

where am i going?what will i do?What Do You Do When You Love Two People?

well all you people out there I'm lookin for some serious advise from anyone who has been in a similar situation(which I seriously doubt).12 years a go I met the love of my life whom I spent about 2 years with.I'm a male and was desperate to become a father.The girl whom I was with could not for medical reasons have children and to cut a long story short we split up,I met someone else and had kids but never married,I was fond of her but never loved her as I did the first girl.

I have recently started to talk to the first girl again and all the feelings are still there.There has hardly a day went by when I havnt thought of her,comments please 

-question by kenny dunt

[iGuest 3]

Hi Cody -- I don't know if this is helpful but since both women know that you love them both and deciding is proving impossible, have you considered saying to them that you want to not choose? That you really want to have a long-term relationship with both people? I know that each wants you, but does each want you so much that they want to risk your happiness and their own by forcing you to choose? And of course you're right that the children will also suffer. I know it's unconventional, but if you put it to them that it is what you really want and you will do your absolute best to be a loving partner and father and to please give you this chance, maybe they will surprise you -- particularly if you acknowledge that it is a quirk of your own that makes this what you need. If you don't feel you can live without either of them, perhaps they will do their best to understand and accept that not everyone thrives in a conventional marriage.

-reply by hopeful

[iGuest 3]

Confused-Need help making sense of my lifeWhat Do You Do When You Love Two People?

My current boyfriend and I have been dating for about 1 1/2 yrs now.  We have lived together for about 9 months.  He really wanted to buy a house so the two of us went house shopping and he closes on the house friday.  I will not be on the deed as of right now because I choose not to be unless we were to get married first but I will be moving into the house with him.  I really thought that this was something I wanted but I am having second thoughts. It gets more complicated.  Before I started dating my current boyfriend I dated my high school sweetheart for 9 years.  We had a house together and planned to get married.  He wasn't the perfect boyfriend though.  He liked to party and was not ready to grow up so we sold the house and I moved out on my own.  Even though we were broke up we still would see eachother off and on.  He has told me numerous times that he misses me and wants me back.. He has grown up and wants us to get married and promises things would be right this time.  I miss him a lot.  We always had a lot of fun together and in my relationship I'm in now I feel bored sometimes because we don't do as much as my ex and I used to. Plus all my friends are my ex and I mutual friends and I don't feel comfortable bringing my new boyfriend around all them so it is very hard.  My family also does not like my ex but loves my new boyfriend.  I'm not for sure what to do. I'm moving into a house in four days with my current boyfriend but cant seem to get my ex out of my head.  I don't want to hurt either one of them but I care for them both,  I need some advice.

-question by kristel

[iGuest 3]

stuck between two guys help ?What Do You Do When You Love Two People?

ok I'm stuck between two guys can someone please help . I meant dude number 1 about a year ago and we've been talking for about a year . He means the world to me . He makes me happy and has always been here for me . We started to date but we had to keep it a secret because his family doesn't like me too well and there is just too much drama . Then we broke up but we still had our connection and still talk. He never told me he loved me he always use to say I really care for you . Then I meant dude number 2 and he caught my eye and I don't really know why I like him I just do . We started to date but I was still talking to dude number 1 well dude number 2 turned out to be a jerk and was very mean and controlling . so I just kept talking to dude number 1 we started to grow more feelings for one another . Well dude number 2 came back and told me that he really wanted to be with me and he will change for me and he did now were dating and we've been dating for two months and there has been no problems but I've notice that I really do care about dude number 1 I think about him all the time and I'm falling in love with him .And I really confused what should I do ???

and just recently I found out that dude number 1 is falling in love with me to

-question by tanya

[iGuest 3]

I'm not in this situation as you see it. I'm on the other end :/

I'm in love with a boy.. He says he feels same but then he told me he likes someone else as well.I honestly don't know what to do ;I cant walk away :/ like he told me to because he hates seeing me hurting. But he doesn't get walking away hurts more.the other girl he likes has been meeting up with boys while all this is going on even though she is aware of how he feels. But I cant think about another boy bar him. When this lad asked for my number I just said. I love someone. He says he's gonna leave us both alone. But that' s not fair. I've realized how hard it is for me to deal with this. But it got me thinking. How hard must it be for him. He doesn't want either of us to get hurt. But what he doesn't understand is that its hurting me while he's trying to chose. When she's out meeting other boys. Ive asked him if he wanted me to walk away.. An he said yea you deserve better :/ butt I only want him. Ive said id walk away for him ;so that there's only one girl to chose from. As long as he'd be happy. But I cant. Ive tried an I cant. ..What am I suppose to do :/? x

[ASHISHRANJAN 0]

WHEN EVER I LOVE TO PEOPLE AT ONCE THEN I DO ONE MTHING FIRST THAT I DO NOTLET THEM KNOW BOTH OF THEM THAT I LOVE BOTH OF THEMi never let them know both of them that i love both of them. if they i will br kiled by them

Notice from rvalkass:

Merged another double post.

[iGuest 3]

CHOOSE OR WAIT:::What Do You Do When You Love Two People?

I suggest that if you not being able to chose between your two loves than you do not have a strong enough bond to love them. In the future you shall find someone else that you truely love and will not be able to even look at another person.Have patience my friend.HOPE I COULD HELP,JUST BE PATIENT.

[iGuest 3]

I love two peopleWhat Do You Do When You Love Two People?

this has been going on for months.  I love two people. I constantly deny it to myself, but it's true. I'm with one guy. We're really close, to a point where shutting him out of my life would be like losing a limb. But he knows I still think about my ex because he found out I cheated on him. I didn't make excuses, and agreed we should break up, which was the first time I felt heart broken, horribly! so I decided to leave my ex alone, and just move on with my life. But after a few days my boyfriend called me and we got back together. And it was great for a while, because I wasn't talking to my ex... But I still thought about him. We were together for 2 1/2 years! it's more complicated than I can explain in a short space. Can I even get valid advice if I can't tell the whole long story? I don't know. But after a while I contacted my ex again and we've been talking. He wants me to move in with him, and I have at times had my mind made up to do it, but other times I feel like I can't leave my boyfriend. So, I'm trying to be a decent person... What am I supposed to do? 

-reply by kelly

 

[iGuest 3]

ChoicesWhat Do You Do When You Love Two People?

well to answer your question I think you should sit down and realy look at both people and their situations, see which one remembers things and seem more interesting because sometimes the smallest things means the most to you, the little things that makes you smile like him remembering the first time you met, or what you wore on your second date or even something not important but he remembers it, also be careful because sometimes we look at people and what they have for example: you might say well my boyfriend has a car, money and his own place, but my ex has a job, in school and is still living with his parents... But your ex might be the one you really wanna be with, if thats the case and you choose him, help him get where the both of you want to be and if you choose your boyfriend make sure you know why you love him don't let material things get in the way remembers when you fight for something it feels better in the end than when something is just handed to you...But I wish you the best I know how you feel... 

-reply by perfectly imperfect

[iGuest 3]

Lips of an AngelWhat Do You Do When You Love Two People?

ok so I wouldnt say that I LOVE two girls right now, but I am certainly attracted to two different yet both amazing girls. I am in a relationship with one and we have been dating for about 2 months but we've only known eachother for 3.5 months. Since the start of this semester. Anyways, the other girl is one of my closest friends and I have known her for a little over a year. We talk almost everyday and I told her how I felt before I started dating my current girlfriend but she has a boyfriend.

This is kindof where it gets messy. I told my current girlfriend that I still have feelings for this other girl but I didnt want to leave my girlfriend to pursue the other girl. However, the other night this other girl and I basically had a deep conversation about how we've both kindof been unsatisfied with our boyfriends'/girlfriends'. Everything that we are missing in our current relationships can be found in eachother but we are at different schools, 2.5 hours apart and we are both still in relationships that we are committed to and don't want to hurt the other person. 

If you listen to music... The song by Hinder- lips of an Angel describes the situation I am in almost perfectly. The conclusion that I believe would be the best would be to just break up with my current girlfriend and stop communications with the other girl and stay single for a while. In that time of being single try and figure out what I really want in a relationship I guess. This is just really difficult for me becuase I don't want to hurt anyone and both girls are extrodanary.

 If anyone has any suggestions or comments or wants to kick me in the face which might be helpful. Please reply. 

-reply by Johnny C

[gisellebebegirl 0]

i think the best thing to do is to keep going along, eventually you will realise who you care most about and the other will not matter as much anymoreand honestly most of the times you end up choosing none, because you realise it was not love to begin with!

[anwiii 17]

hmmm...old thread....ok...#1 is to be honest with yourself and those you love. don't lead them on in any way and they should both know your true feelings. next, i would take time out for your own self. if you truely love both, one will stand out more than the other. eventually you will have to make a choice unless your morman and believe in that b.s.i guess it can be natural to love two people at once so i would hope others would understand that. at the same time, don't expect either to wait for you. it's you that is confused. not them.you really have to dig deep inside yourself and choose one that compliments your inner soul more than the other. just remember. just because you love someone....and in your case two people.....doesn't mean you are destined to be together. you know your own self more than these two women. it's up to you to take control of your own life with no regrets my friend....so take time out to find your way....