Suicide

[JDameron91 0]

Hi everyone. :PI was just thinking about suicide, no, not commiting it. Because my friend is always talking about killing himself. I was just curious to see if any of you had any ideas of what I can/should say to him to help him, without making it worse. He has been speaking of it more and more lately and I'm just a little bit worried. :DThank you all for you help.

Edited February 23, 2007 by JDameron91 (see edit history)

[truefusion 3]

You're gonna have to be more informative if you want our help. What you provided is far too general to even know where to begin. What has happened in his life that he should be considering death? He must feel there's no meaning in his life anymore to be considering such a thing. But still, why...? Why does he think/believe that?

[BuffaloHelp 24]

I think it's normal to think about suicide--it's a natural course in part of growing up, asking oneself "what does it all mean?" Whether the scientists attributes these thinkings as the biochemistry of the brain firing up electrodes causing it to trigger certain hormonal imbalance or a learned condition which derived from witnessing a social behavior, one thing is clear in that the difference between sane and insane is in the execution.Perhaps your friend is unintentionally seeking an attention of some sort. Affection received from self-pity can be rewarding. And it can be addictive, too. I hava a friend who never has a good thing to say about her life. She likes it when she receives comments like, awww, I'm so sorry to hear that. It is her way of socializing with people around her. I guess this is the only way she knows how to be social or break the ice.Sometimes an action is greater than words. Just being there for that person can make the difference. Carefully monitoring your friend's behavior and make him known that his friendship means a lot to you. Men tend to be more sociable through activites unlike our counter parts--women. I guess we still possess a primitive pack behavior. Confronting head on is less effective than blurting out during a happy hour at a local pub or whatever. Let's face it, we men do not talk about our feelings like Dr. Phil.One thing I'd like to post is that you cannot be the savior to this person. One person does not possess the power to fix everything. Like the winter snow covers the fagile seedling, your friend will face many other crushing defeats in his life time. But when the spring comes and snow melts away, this seedling can survive if the soil is accomodating. Your friend must be able to find his own balance and foundation that defines him. You can help him to find that ground or supply the means of finding one. But you can't watch over him 24/7. Otherwise you too can grow weary and maybe forced to give up.

[JDameron91 0]

@truefusion: Sorry, his girlfriend is always mad at him he says, and she keeps threatining to dump him. His mom and dad split up, and his brother went to Iraq. That's some of the stuff he tells me a lot.@buffaloHELP: Thanks for that post man, it was really helpful. He doesn't seem to be seeking attention, it just seems like he's deppressed more than anything, it's probably part of his "growing up" from turning 18/19 to 20. You know? Thank you both for you help so far.

[truefusion 3]

It seems the best thing to do is to just be there with and for him, whenever possible. Everyone may leave him, but he may acknowledge that you're here to stay. Be sad when he's sad, and be happy when he's happy. Sure, it's humanly impossible to be always faithful, but he may acknowledge your efforts in trying to be there for him. There's not much i can say, i've never had a friend that made it known to me that they were considering suicide.

[FolkRockFan 0]

I've never been in your situation, so I have no real advice for you. I just wanted to say, though, that it sounds like you really care about your friend. Good for you. I hope and pray that you keep caring and that your friend makes it through everything that's going on right now.

[Marina 0]

even if he just say it and don't really mean it.or even if he may seek for a little attention.I think you should take any chance.I think you need to help him and maybe talk to someone about it.you never know if he's going to do it for real or not.so If I were you I wouldn't take any chance.

[MIGUE2k7 0]

Suicide for me is the worst thing a human can do. It is just pointless, is giving up but then you have no chance to try anything again. I just cant understand, what makes a person decide to suicide? no one knows what comes after death, there may be a worse thing that what that person is going trough but many people still do it. Im sure i will never think about commiting suicide, because i fear death :DYou should tell to your friend, that he can do anything else on his life rather than suicide, if he is planning to. Whatever problem he may be having now, will be resolved by itself with the time, this may be just a hard moment, but not a impossible one :PWell, if you make him think about how much would affect his death to his family and friends, he will change his mind. But first make sure that what you think is right, he may not even want to suicide

[JDameron91 0]

Good points, guys. :PI talked to him, he seems to have calmed down a bit, but any more ideas are welcome and I will use your guy's advice if he starts to do this again.

[jlhaslip 4]

Suicide is a long term solution to a short term problem. Usually.

[Forbez 0]

Suicide is a waste of life. The problem that is happening to you at the moment may get better. If you commit suicide then you have wasted your life on something stupid. Always remember, many peple would kill to get the life you live.

[JasperIk 0]

I am not saying 'don't be concerned with your friend' but just here me out. Sometimes those not talking are the ones who really want to die. A lot of times when a person says they want to kill them self it may just be a cry for attention. Many people who try to kill themselves/succeed are not in the right state of mind when they do it, it sometimes is planned but i know from personal experience it sometimes is spontaneous, not that nothing leads up to it, but the actual act is spontaneous. Sometimes people just get overwhelmed an contemplate suicide and openly discuss it, but many times its temporary and they calm down and move on. You should always ask a friend how they are doing, get them to talk...be there, regardless if they appear sad or not.

[zak92 0]

To tell you the truth until all these wars and until my move from Canada i loved my life. I see now that this world is full of injustice and no freedom of speech. I really aint intrested into life anymore. I would love to die but suicide is not going to get me to a better place it will just put me in hell. I hope gods brings justice for i cannot take it. The worst thing is freedom of speech.

[Unregistered 012 0]

Well, i think most people when are under a lot of stress or have really bad problems probably think about suicide. Not doing it but thinking. I think most people will think about it at least 1 time in their life. If the person says it a lot, or is telling you that they ARE going to do it, then you need to talk to someone about it. like a consular or parents. somebody that can help. try to convince him to stop talking like that. since i have never really had an encounter with something like this i couldnt tell you exactly what to do.

[friiks 0]

If we're thinking bout the same guy JD then he just says he's antisocial and stuff. I know him for lil less than 2 years now and yeah, well, his girlfriend lives in another country and he's getting jealous when she goes out of the house etc. You know , like she's not sitting at the pc all day and talking to him. Also he wont go out of the house. Why? He just says he's antisocial but I think that the problem is that he just doesn't to go out. People, friends around him is what he needs.