She's Hanging Onto Me + Shes Too Young..:( please help

[room2593 0]

anwii, you are cracking me up more than anything! lol! to be honest, you got ways of writing these long posts with no material!!

 

anyways, whatever man...you've made your point and gotten your mycents: i'm a sicko alright. thanks very much, that helped.

 

cheers, and just so you know i've decided to stop talking with her...even if i do it will be for a few days as we are moving house and going 650+miles away!

 

to anyone bothering to reply..please don't as im no longer watching this thread...anwii is now my spokesperson, he'll respond on my behalf!

1st: Cheers for taking this so well. Internet flame wars can get so horrid.

2nd: You're crackin' me up with your utter disregard. I know you're not gonna read this, but I have to let you know that I find that hilarious.

3rd: I'm glad that you were able to resist any temptation. It's hard for men to think with their brain and not with their wang. The fact that you dumped her immediately means that you're commendable. Don't feel bad about any subsequent actions you've made, since you've proven yourself with that.

 

As for anwiii: You've got me laughin', man. Seriously, that is some really broken internet logic that you think you can change a guy's mind from halfway across the world just by calling him a sicko and haranguing him again and again.

Perhaps I should just extricate myself from this thread, but it's just too beautiful to NOT post on. It's amazingly yes. It shows the ideas behind the internet: an infinite number of monkeys yelling loudly into the ether. Amazing.

[anwiii 17]

yea, it's funny isn't it....until a teenage child get hurt. then it's not funny anymore......is it. i may have taken this thread to the edge of things, but i would rather do that than say nothing at all in what i know about right from wrong.

now....i have to thank you for keeping this thread alive because that's exactly the way i want it.... it creates an awareness of certain things going on in society that shouldn't be allowed

fact is, i didn't create any flame war. the guy is sick to think that it's ok to tutor her when he admited to having feelings for this under age girl. this is considered stalking in an unusual way when he leaves the decision up to HER knowing what her answer will be while thinking he doesn't have to take any responsibility for her own choices

it gets a little complicated to explain exactly what i see going on that is wrong here but i for one wont let that complication get in the way of voicing my own opinion.

if we has the ability to disect this thread and vote about what is right or wrong, i would say at least 90% of the people, after disecting this thread and the thoughts behind legends actions, would say he is wrong

but now he said he moved....so now what? find another under age girl to attatch himself to in some way? there's only one way to deal with people like that when on the internet....and that's not to sugar coat anything.

it's true, i have a big mouth at times when dealing with certain issues sometimes but it's not to slander or flame someone. the intent is to get someone to realize right from wrong as quick as i can so any possibility of damage and hurting someone in the future can be minimized. he came here wanting advice. i gave it to him. not only that, i wasn't just thinking about his issues. i was thinking about other issues. like the girl....and the parents of the girl. this issue was FAR from just being about HIM. people can be blinded by the fact that the issues revolved around more than one person when only one person comes in here looking for advice.

i don't know this guy, nor does he open up fully for anyone to get to know. wonder why that is. why is he moving around so often? my whole take on this thread was that he didn't want advice as i feel he knows right from wrong and the choice was clear. what he was looking for was an acceptance for his choice while continuing his relations with this under age girl. so....i took it to the extreme opposite end of the spectrum to let him no without a doubt that his choice was WRONG.

so yea, i think he tried to fool people in this thread to try and convince them that all he was here for was advice. it was a point i made in an earlier post. something that can't be proven, but i am excellent in reading through the b.s. sometimes and getting to the heart of the real issue.

i didn't get a lot of support....but hey, neither did he. but i wasn't looking for support. he was... to justify his own choices and actions. if he was seriously looking for help here, he would have gotten it....with many people responding. this forum is filled with good people who are willing to help and give advice. that didn't happen though...most of it was my banter and his response to my banter and the thread went nowhere because it WASN'T HELP or ADVICE HE WAS LOOKING FOR.

when people can't see the hidden thoughts behind certain issues, then the real issues get left unheard and unattended to....and that's when circumstances can get worse for everyone involved. it's when thoughts can turn in to more than just thoughts and a teenage girl can get seriously hurt because a 20 year old man gave in to his thoughts even when he was trying to control them. i am not saying this would have happened. all i am saying is that it could have been a possibility if nobody addressed the underlying issues and the thought process of this guy who still chose to tutor this girl when he had lustfull thoughts towards her.

so what is funny to you now, may not be funny later when you read on the news that some 15 year old girl was raped by someone who didn't know right from wrong. think about it and think about how one can be there for an under aged child and her family and friends when one doesn't even know them. you help them through HIM who chose to post about this situation.

to even understand this post, you have to understand how people get hurt in society and what leads up to it. once you understand that, you understand my whole point and intention in posting what i did.

now i have dedicated my life somewhat in helping others. i have come to the conclusion you can help people two ways. being there for them AFTER they get hurt, or being there for them BEFORE they get hurt. it's easy to be there for someone after they have gotten hurt but they will still have to carry the hurt. what's harder is being there for someone before they get hurt because the possibilites are endless and there is no cut and dry facts that anyone will get hurt. only the possibilities of getting hurt.

now, if i know the possibilites. and i am able to cut down the possibilites of anyone getting hurt, should i do nothing and risk someone getting hurt? or should i not take that risk knowing that there is that possibility nobody will get hurt. this is where i go with my intuitions and gut instincts in which i have great ones that normally don't fail me.

i am not perfect. nor do i handle situations perfectly at times, but that doesn't mean i should strive to be as perfect as i can under certain circumstances...wether people like it or not, i do not care because i see more than the ones judging at times. that is a fact that may be hard for some to understand.

1st: Cheers for taking this so well. Internet flame wars can get so horrid.2nd: You're crackin' me up with your utter disregard. I know you're not gonna read this, but I have to let you know that I find that hilarious.
3rd: I'm glad that you were able to resist any temptation. It's hard for men to think with their brain and not with their wang. The fact that you dumped her immediately means that you're commendable. Don't feel bad about any subsequent actions you've made, since you've proven yourself with that.

As for anwiii: You've got me laughin', man. Seriously, that is some really broken internet logic that you think you can change a guy's mind from halfway across the world just by calling him a sicko and haranguing him again and again.
Perhaps I should just extricate myself from this thread, but it's just too beautiful to NOT post on. It's amazingly yes. It shows the ideas behind the internet: an infinite number of monkeys yelling loudly into the ether. Amazing.

[D. Benitez 0]

Geez Anwii, Everything you accuse me of, you just did. You have good logic in this particular situation, but the way you go about it is way out there. You first accused me, when I first heard from you, that I reminded you why you did not go to church because of my long sermon. That was a pretty long post and it was for nothin because he told you he was finished reading anything on this post anymore. Geez, It feels good being on the other side for a change. All you have is human reasoning with no Biblical mention which is the real issue. The guy said he broke things off, and you assumed and judged him like he was lying. Didn't you tell me that I was judgemental? I always showed compassion when I gave advise with God the center. You have secular knowledge only which does no good. Maybe the guy was lying, but maybe he was really doing what he said by ending things once he knew she was underage. You really need to carefully read your posts and notice how judgemental you are. You show no love whatsoever. You probably will tell me I am showing no love, but really I am because you need to be told how you come across. Only your opinion matters. Everyone has a right to their opinion whether right or wrong. and everyone has the right to give their advise to those who ask for it. The person receiving can decide for themself what post they feel will help them. I just find it amazing how much you attacked me in the past and you just did what you accused me of. The last response the person told you it was a long post with no real material. You told me the same thing on the very first post I did. I'm still praying for you. In His Love,D. Benitez

[anwiii 17]

get a life. maybe you can post on topic for a change. this thread wasn't about you. nor was it even about me.

[webishqiptar 0]

hi guys,

 

 

 

now the problem is that i cant do anything when i'm with her. sex has never been an option with her since i'm not into that (believe it or not...im kinda focused on my studies)...

well I think sex won't prevent you from studies, or studying. It only can improve . I think you should be careful on relationships with immature or teen girls. I know that even if you have sex with her wanting to do so, is called a crime. But I advice to let time decide. Just a couple of moths, at least when she makes 16, than you're an adult you can decide by yourself.

[inverse_bloom 0]

I advise you to just say sorry to the girl and tell her you have to walk away from her. I could imagine you have all these conflicting emotions going on right know, right? That may become increasingly painful depending on how strongly you feel for her, you will need to extract more control out of yourself as time goes on. The wise part of you should be saying that this is "most probably" a no win situation, in that case do the strong thing and allow yourself to move on. If you believe it to be something more then superficial love and something much more deeper, than giving things a chance by maintaining a platonic friendship for a little while, may be the way to go. But if there isn't a strong basis for friendship, i'd forget it if i were you. (Don't be a fool, be honest with yourself, not what you would like to believe)

Edited November 27, 2009 by inverse_bloom (see edit history)

[D. Benitez 0]

Anwii,Geez, I was on topic. You don't understand anything. You are an angry person who talks, but makes no sense. Only you can correct people. For once I told you what you usually tell everybody else and obviously you don't like it. Of coarse It is not about me or you. Remember that!. You beat people and I just try to encourage and give my opinion according to the Word of God which is the only thing that counts. I may not sound encouraging to you right now, but you need someone to give you a little bit of your own medicine. What's good for the Geese is good for the Gander. Have you heard that one? By the way, I do have a Life. a Good one. Have a great Thanksgiving, and I really mean that.In His Love,D. Benitez

[anwiii 17]

there you go again, talking about me and not on topic tho this thread. who said you didn't have a life or a good one? are you smokin' crack again? is jesus coming to you in your dreams. you sound as ridiculous as a 20 year old wanting to be close to a 15 year old. so i guess you ARE on topic if we are measuring that way. i am really really glad you had the oppurtinity to give an opinion that didn't relate to this thread one bit. i congratulate you. let's move on.

Anwii,Geez, I was on topic. You don't understand anything. You are an angry person who talks, but makes no sense. Only you can correct people. For once I told you what you usually tell everybody else and obviously you don't like it. Of coarse It is not about me or you. Remember that!. You beat people and I just try to encourage and give my opinion according to the Word of God which is the only thing that counts. I may not sound encouraging to you right now, but you need someone to give you a little bit of your own medicine. What's good for the Geese is good for the Gander. Have you heard that one?
By the way, I do have a Life. a Good one. Have a great Thanksgiving, and I really mean that.

In His Love,

D. Benitez

[Parubilla 0]

I totally agree with D.Benitez, you should totally get away from that girl, she?s reaally young and probably just thinking she?s the coolest from her group because she?s dating someone older, and you could get in a lot of trouble if something happens, you don?t want to be caught in the rage of an anger parent because you?re dating his daughter. And that age 15 - 20 there might be only five years but at that point just mentally there?s a lot of difference, the situations you two are living are just too different, just imagine 5 years ago she was 10!!, like D.Benitez said when you pass the age of 20, 21, 22 the age difference with someone older is not that noticeable because your probably handling the same type of situations, if you?re working all the older people is working as well so you have a lot of things in common no matter the age gape, and the mentality once you pass certain age is not that different. So you should start looking for girls your age and she should be studying instead of thinking of boys that much. I think your decision was correct and just run away from her as much as you can!

[webishqiptar 0]

I totally agree with D.Benitez, you should totally get away from that girl, she?s reaally young and probably just thinking she?s the coolest from her group because she?s dating someone older, and you could get in a lot of trouble if something happens, you don?t want to be caught in the rage of an anger parent because you?re dating his daughter. And that age 15 - 20 there might be only five years but at that point just mentally there?s a lot of difference, the situations you two are living are just too different, just imagine 5 years ago she was 10!!, like D.Benitez said when you pass the age of 20, 21, 22 the age difference with someone older is not that noticeable because your probably handling the same type of situations, if you?re working all the older people is working as well so you have a lot of things in common no matter the age gape, and the mentality once you pass certain age is not that different. So you should start looking for girls your age and she should be studying instead of thinking of boys that much. I think your decision was correct and just run away from her as much as you can!

Wow, really impressive. I like your way of thinking. But he's young why can't he just have a normal relationship without intimate contacts? Does this mean that boys shouldn't date girls younger than 18?Well, in my opinion boys should date girls younger than themselves, as girls tent to be more mature if they're in the same age, and this causes problems.

[Parubilla 0]

He could, but the way he´s putting it the girl is like all over him and want something else, men are men, specially young it´s going to be really hard if he likes her not to at least hold her hand, let´s be honest is not that easy at those ages to be responsible and contain youself. And If your older off course you should only date girls over 18 if not that could get you a lot of trouble, and what if it´s a mean girl and want to make up something about you it could lead you to jail, there are things you just don´t think but could happen. I think you should date people according to your age stage I don´know how to explain it, but for me you shouldn´t go too low or too high.

Wow, really impressive. I like your way of thinking. But he's young why can't he just have a normal relationship without intimate contacts? Does this mean that boys shouldn't date girls younger than 18?Well, in my opinion boys should date girls younger than themselves, as girls tent to be more mature if they're in the same age, and this causes problems.

Edited November 27, 2009 by Parubilla (see edit history)

[legend112 0]

GUYS IM BACK!!!

 

Heck this thread is still running? wow!!! i surely did start something didn't i!!

 

Oh my god, jeez, just going through what people posted when I was away has got me laughing real bad!

 

anwii, people has said that way you try to give advice is wrong and you have denied this. cools, i aint got no problem with that. maybe you do it for the long posts...mycents...whatever man.

 

well...this might surprise everyone but I am dating a very gorgeous girl now! yeah!! she's the best thing that has ever happened in my life. [i hope this doesn't close off the topic though...i'll keep it alive, i swear!!!]

 

@anwii...you need to grow up. you're forty but my younger brother talks more sense than you. I mean...it beats me totally...how does a man who's almost the same age as my dad pick a fight with twenty year old? don't you have anything else to do? i mean come on...i can't even stoop to your level...im 20 and im over that! i feel sorry for those who know you in person. You just babble and can't reason. at such an age, i'd stop acting like my hormones are on fire and approach an issue with some sense.

 

anyways...i never really told you like this because i respected you as you are twice my age but after seeing how you treat others as well...you should be disgraced...you don't have any manners...i don't know how you grew up but i hope i don't raise up my kids in such a way.

 

i'm truly sorry if im doing the same as you do..anyways...all the other guys...thanks bunches...as i said im now in truly in love and happy how i saved myself from this situation! [or rather how God saved me!! lol]

Edited November 28, 2009 by legend112 (see edit history)

[anwiii 17]

no doubt. he probably has the same sense as you do and probably will give the advice you wanted to hear which was to be with some 15 year old girl and tutor her. good sense just runs in your family, doesn't it. my only advice to a sicko like you was to steer clear. everyone else seems to agree. nobody had a problem with that advice. they had a problem in how i talk to a sicko like you who would even have thoughts of tutoring a 15 year old that you had the hots for.

 

hahaha don't turn this around like this thread is about me. i'm not running around with underage girls. i also get out of the house to have a social life AND friends...unlike your life that you have already admitted to. and i had to laugh when you admitted that your family was happy that you actually found 1 friend.

 

listen bud, you can say all you want about me. you don't even know me as i haven't opened up my life for you to know me. all you know about me is that i don't like your tactics or judgment.

 

now don't feel sorry for the people that know me. that is just an absurd comment....you can however feel sorry for me that i had no choice but to listen to your sick thoughts and confusion towards a 15 year old. that's straight out of jr. high and you're in college. haha what the @#$ haha no no no....don't turn this thread in to something *I* did haha....sicko

 

thought you weren't going to post in this thread again? i guess we can add lies to your resume now too.

 

GUYS IM BACK!!!

 

@anwii...you need to grow up. you're forty but my younger brother talks more sense than you. I mean...it beats me totally...how does a man who's almost the same age as my dad pick a fight with twenty year old? don't you have anything else to do? i mean come on...i can't even stoop to your level...im 20 and im over that! i feel sorry for those who know you in person. You just babble and can't reason. at such an age, i'd stop acting like my hormones are on fire and approach an issue with some sense.

[legend112 0]

no doubt. he probably has the same sense as you do and probably will give the advice you wanted to hear which was to be with some 15 year old girl and tutor her. good sense just runs in your family, doesn't it. my only advice to a sicko like you was to steer clear. everyone else seems to agree. nobody had a problem with that advice. they had a problem in how i talk to a sicko like you who would even have thoughts of tutoring a 15 year old that you had the hots for.

 

hahaha don't turn this around like this thread is about me. i'm not running around with underage girls. i also get out of the house to have a social life AND friends...unlike your life that you have already admitted to. and i had to laugh when you admitted that your family was happy that you actually found 1 friend.

 

listen bud, you can say all you want about me. you don't even know me as i haven't opened up my life for you to know me. all you know about me is that i don't like your tactics or judgment.

 

now don't feel sorry for the people that know me. that is just an absurd comment....you can however feel sorry for me that i had no choice but to listen to your sick thoughts and confusion towards a 15 year old. that's straight out of jr. high and you're in college. haha what the @#$ haha no no no....don't turn this thread in to something *I* did haha....sicko

 

thought you weren't going to post in this thread again? i guess we can add lies to your resume now too.

I decided to come back again and realised it was still on the home page....i was stoked!

 

and all credit to you anwii! i think you're reaching millionaire status here at Xisto...actually i heard you are going to buy Xisto in MyCents currency? lol!

 

[now thats your level...i won't be surprised if you reply to that...i purposely have to act immature to have a chat with you.]

 

but at the end of the day, im glad to have met you...you showed me this world is full of people who wish to change the world and use whatever ways to do that, even if it means they become the problem afterwards..and hey dude..og...granddad lol..life starts at forty so you still got chances...good luck to you on that.

 

im forced to try and advise you now that im happily in love...everybody else please pardon my nonsense..this thread might as well turn into something about anwii coz he needs help..he's really forty!

 

oh you spoke about my social life?? nah you did not? did you? of course...being you, you just throw anything out [at 40! lol]...i don't socialise by choice. most people my age are into drugs and all the other crap stuff...should i force myself to hang out with such? i don't think so. Only friends i have are people I grew up with and trust. most people i meet don't really stand for what i believe in so im pretty content with my life...and of course...my new girlfriend makes it all magical...

 

oh...life is sweet and I never did nothing with that girl so stop anwii...sicko seems to be the only word you know [at 40!]

[webishqiptar 0]

and all credit to you anwii! i think you're reaching millionaire status here at Xisto...actually i heard you are going to buy Xisto in MyCents currency? lol!

Pretty nice sense of humor I liked it and it make me laugh. Guys I think you're going a bit off topic because you are taking it personal. I suggest that writing for myCents is a good thing, but shouldn't push anyone at creating useless or aggravating debates which can bring nothing for good.

In my opinion, it is important to let Legend12 judge the situation by itself which means, that even if he thought of making sex with his girlfriend is not something so big and alarming. It's quite normal for a boy at his age (or at any age at all ) and girls nowadays tent to be very developed in a growth perspective and in appearance.

Something even more important and appreciable is that he stopped himself by his own hormones, by healthy and mature thinking. So he should be thanked for this.