Jump to content
xisto Community
feipoh

Do You Think We Should Tell People When They Smell?

Recommended Posts

Do you think we should tell people when they smell?Yesterday, I went to college, I was sitting next to this single mum, and her cloth really smell very badly. Honest, I feel so ill through out the 2 hours lesson.I understand, she is a single mother and living on benefit, i am not talking about spending big money on new clothing but keep yourself clean? You know wash your cloths more often? make sure you don't smell.I am sure other students felt the same as well, it explained why the chair next to her is always empty. As i always the last person to enter class, hence i always ended up sitting next to her.I am not looking down on her but deep down i really would like to drag her one side and told her about her cloth smell very badly, you know smell like a homeless person? but then i remembered the British Way, keep your mouth shot, be tactful and move on..So, do you think we should do that tactful thing like keep our mouth shot and accept people the way they are or should we tell them that they smell??

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm not too sure on this one, if it is really bothering you maybe the best way to do this is to come out and tell her, as you say it's not about spending loads of money... it's not too hard to keep yourself clean but it is true that raising a child does take time.The only problem here is that it's just not the done thing in this country, the situation would be a lot better if it wasn't for the long standing British tradition of just ignoring the problem so as to not offend anyone.Should you decide to confront this problem it should definitely be handled in a tactful manner i.e. take her to one side and simply tell her that a few of the students have been mocking her because she tends to smell a bit (that way you don't look like you're doing her a favour by notifying her that others view her as a source of humour). Other than that you could just turn up earlier so you don't have to sit next to her (that's what I'd do by the way.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, it depends on who the person is and the circumstances. You have to think about a few things:* If you comment on them, will they take it the wrong way? Be careful who you tell,* Of course, if you have the confidence,* If they're a stranger, it might not be wise...But if it's your friend, then it might be,But also, you have to think about how the other person may feel...I'm slightly insecure about how I smell, coz my arm pits sweat quite abit, especially if it's warm/stuffy...When people comment on it, I feel awkward...But I do think whether people can smell me or not...Anyways, I'm slightly rambling...If it's a really bad smell, then yes...But if it's BO, then no, unless it goes on for a long time. That, and if you have the guts to :) Coz I wouldn't

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tell her, and being a single mother is not excuse. Just tell her, so what if she takes it the wrong way...is there even a right way to take 'you smell bad'? She has brought it upon herself. Obviously if she smells, she has poor hygiene, which obviously isn't a good thing. If she can afford to go to a university, i am sure she can afford to was her clothes...and if she cant juggle both, maybe she needs to wait on a university until she can manage basics, like washing yourself and your clothes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It would probably be better and easier to tell that to people who are close to you... She does seem like a stranger... I don't see what being a single mother has to do with it unless she herself says it as an excuse... but she obviously doesn't seem to be aware of it.Though to be honest... if I were in your shoes, I'd have a hard time myself. I'm not the type of person who can say such things frankly especially to strangers... I'd probably try to get on good terms with her before saying it. After all, it beats talking about it behind her back, right?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

well, i think that people that smell should be notified of that fact. of course, im from the USA so people are a bit more rude here. people used to tell me how bad i smelled, but after a while i started showering more and wearing deodorant, and just generally taking care of myself more. so its not that big of a deal, when your young that is.for a grown woman however, that must be pretty repulsive. i wouldnt be able to take it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

IMO it would be kind of rude to tell it to a stranger, but like tell them in a way that won't seem offensive to them. A couple days ago at school, in the lunch line was this kid who smelled horribly, so baf that I couldn't stand there and just went to the back of the line.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lol you could always secretly spray her with some perfume or something. Other than that just tell her, she probably doesn't even know she smells since she's used to it and it's like when you wear clone and a few seconds later you can't smell yourelf anymore but the person you walked into can smell it. She probably thinks she doesn't smell at all, not telling her is like getting grossed about something the person doesn't even know, and when the person finds out herself she smells and no one told her, she'd get even more hurt than you telling her in the first place. Or you can always talk to her befriends with her.... if her breath smells too.. offer her a piece of candy. :) and once you get a little more close you can tell her and she won't get hurt as much :] hehe just a suggestion even though it might sound confusing.. give it try :}

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i think that personal hygiene is very important, not just because people can smell you if you are unclean, but also because of the health problem. if you do not clean yourself regurally, and that counts for clothes too, bacteria begin to inhabit on you, your skin, and some of them ate dangerous, which means you can get sick, and if you hurt yourself, with open wound, they can breach into your body, and the wound doesnt heal right, thats one of the reasons why people died so young during the medival ages, because theyx didnt clean themselves enough....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

well, ....the end..??I never had the chance to tell her anything, i gave up because i realised that she is a very narrow minded person, not worth my efforts, just lets her be.Why? One day after lesson, I needed to go some where, so i happened to take the same bus as she and her matey. There were only 3 of us in the bus stop and we waited 15 minutes for the bus. I tried to talk to them a few time, smilling smilling and said hello and stuffs like that, guess what? They used their back to face me as if i'm not there at all..! ... i could not believed it.That's the moment i realised, if i decided to stay in Uk permenantly, racism will be part of my life.I decided to be better then average....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This is a tough one, you want to let them know. But you don't want to be rude. I would tell them, as nice as possible. That they well, smell..hah. But try to be nice about it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with Dagoth Nereviar in that it really does depend on who the person is. If these are collegiate level classes shes probably old enough to not accept social etiquette advice from strangers without being offended. If she doesnt get mad, she'll probably just be embarrased. Remember you sit in the same class with her until the course is over. I recommend playing it cool. If it's your classmate that you arent really friends with, you could try to imply it indirectly by kindly offering her a mint or strong minty gum, or perhaps choosing another seat if the option is available to you (thats where coming into class early can really pay off).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't experienced anything where I was actually disturbed by a smell. I usually ignore it since it's none of my business. If it's really frequent and annoying I might just kindly advise someone like on MSN or something since it's less serious and I can integrate it into some kind of random pun that I make (but gets the message through... for example I sometimes make jokes about my friend being fat on MSN, and this sort of tells him that he's fat, but he doesn't take it as an insult).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dooga I don't know how in the world you'd be able to tell them that though. Like say maybe "Hey have you ever meet someone that smells really bad?" I don't know. I have had a barber that smelt horrible and throughout my haircut I tried holding my breath as long as I could and take deep breaths when i could sort of sense the smell was gone. It's sort of wierd. I have always been shy in real life so I'd be scared to go up and tell someone randomly they stink. I'd try to avoid it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I always believe that honesty is the best policy....so yes people if u smell something odd..just be tactful with it though...cos some people don't have a good sense of smell and may not always realise...so u r doing them a favourCaz

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Guidelines | We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.