About Coming Back With A Cheater how many of you would do it?

[Kioku 0]

Only return if you're one hundred percent positive they won't do it again. Elsewise, I'd say they deserve a second chance, but don't allow them to just walk all over you.

[brandice 0]

Taking a cheater back with a "just as long as you'll never do it again" is sort of like giving them permission to do it again. Maybe that sounds wrong. It's like, the cheater realizes that if you take them back they are going to always have you, and so they know that they can get away with anything and still be able to come back to you. You don't have to be treated like that. You deserve to be respected. Every person is important enough to not have to be treated like a doormat. It's tough to let go when you are in love and you believe that one person is the only person for you. But don't you deserve to have someone who is going to feel the same way about you?

[serenity 0]

Taking back a cheater.. have you heard of the saying 'once a cheater, always a cheater' look you have to face the fact that if you carry on with that person there is always a possiblity that person will cheat again. I had a BF who i had been going out wid for about a month and he had had a reputation of being a playa but i didnt look at that much because he was good looking but i did warn he to stop playing around with other girls or i will leave him. So he tried to resist temptations but there was this time we were in church and a **** called jennifer started strutting herself on him. Well what can i say i dont fink anyone would say no so he went along with what she was doing and then felt really guilty after a week and told me what happened and i forgave him but i also dumped him because if he couldnt resist temptations after 1 month then what about 4 months of 1 year time. I had to make the right choice and think

[zaqy 0]

Sometimes you can give 'cheaters' one chance . but if you're not sure what will you do with her. Dont give her any chance.I am sure you will find a good person for yourself and it all about time

[iGuest 3]

I'm pretty sure I'm being cheated on but I don't have the heart to confront him , however when I catch him, I assure you, I wont take him back.

[iGuest 3]

response

About Coming Back With A Cheater

 

I was dating a guy for a long time, when I found out he had cheated on me a few times. We broke up for awhile, but it is really hard to lose someone who was, in my case, my best friend. We are back together and we have sort of an agreement. For the time being, I have all access to his phone and his e-mail and his friends are kind of watching my back for me. Although, before I found out about the other girls I would have never dreamed of "checking up" on him, but I guess he is going to deal with it in order for me to start trusting him again.

 

Finding out about the cheating was really hard on me. And I always told myself that I could never take back a cheater, and thats really an easy thing to say. But when you are in the position, its a lot more difficult. Unfortunately, I don't have the support of my friends either, because most people will not 'get it' until they are in that position

 

Also, I have given him an 'incentive' for not hurting me again. Our last agreement is one that says if he does this again, he gives me full rights to tell this next female a few things about him that no one should know . Although it sounds immature, it would be quite satisfying if I get hurt again! But, I do not believe I will ever have to enforce this last part.. Its mostly just a funny joke when I want to tell him I am getting nervous about one of his 'friends.'

 

Replying to sonorama

 

-reply by scr14

[veesyn 0]

never go for it!!!!!! wen you think someone is cheating you.. just keep off.!!!

[Aeon 0]

It's never the same after a breakup, sorry to say.It's better to let what happened be, and not return.She will most likely fall back into the same habits,so no, It's not healthy. It's downright codependent, if you ask me.

[InsatiableKisses 0]

I have re-started a relationship with someone who has cheated on me before. It is very hard to do because the trust and respect you once had for that person is never going to be what it was before. It takes a lot of forgiveness to be able to carry on a healthy relationship with someone that has cheated on you and the thought will still always be in the back of your mind.I would have to do some serious soul searching before I would ever take someone that has cheated on me back again.

[africa 0]

Tough call.
I suppose it depends on if you are married or not. If single, I would probably move on. If somebody single is straying, it is only signs of more problems ahead, and would not go back. But it would really depend on the specifics.

If married, it is a bit more difficult decision at that point. There may be children involved, and community property, and a long history. But again, it depends on the specifics.

I would never trust a man who cheated to be with me however. I would know, once a cheater...always a cheater. If he was cheating on somebody to be with me, then once he was with me, same thing would happen. Thus, he would eventually cheat on me.

Tough for real.

I am single and i am currently dating a chick who cheated on me once. Reason why we're together is because we share a special bond its part of a relationship to come across problems like these and handle the issue like adults...coming out in the open..talking about it and reaching a nice conclusion.

However something is really taken away when your lover cheats. You feel like you can never them 100% again and for real you shouldn't.

There are a lot of people out there and if this happens...my advice is for you to move on and find a trustworthy person.

[ORene 0]

I wouldn't give her another chance... once a cheater, always a cheater.If a tree is born and grows twisted, well you can't straighten it.In my opinion if you go back with her it would really mean throwing your dignity into the toilet.A person who cheats on his/her couple does not deserve to be with you, its that simple.So I'd say just move on... now if you really really like her and can't live without her, then its your choice. If you love her so much to TOLERATE infidelity then do as you wish. She doesn't deserve another opportunity but again, its your choice.Just remember, once a cheater...always a cheater

[rpgsearcherz 5]

I would never trust someone if they cheated on me....To me it's one of the strongest acts of betrayal.There is no "I love you and I'm sorry I did it." If they loved you, they wouldn't do it in the first place.There are only a few things I am 100% against and will never change my stance on, and cheating is one of them(relationship wise....Cheating on tests and stuff is obviously different).

[Ousk 0]

Never do that, i just break up on the spot if i find out and never look back. It's hard sometimes but she or he will hurt you even more if you try something. It's hard to really trust someone even without them cheating so...

[iGuest 3]

once a cheaterAbout Coming Back With A CheaterWell, ive been in this situation only not too long ago. Only I chose to forgive my man. For months we both have been recovering step by step and doing OK. Not the easiest thing to do, but we were managing it. Until someone decided to start messing with his head over the phone by telling him that I was a women scorned and is out to reak havick on him. SO NOT TRUE... We have just had the worse 4days of hell. He should have trusted in me and believed in me, but his head space was so messed up, and was so rought with anger that we were accusing each other of such mad stuff, that I fineally packed up his stuff and put it all in the shed, so he could stay there until we could get to the bottom of this God awful mess we were yet facing again... We now have a lead on who it may be, and all along I was telling him it was the other women doing this, but as yet no proof on her, but my gut instinct tells me she;s behind it all, just so we would fight so badly and argue so fircely, that we would break up. So, for now, he is away working for a few days. Time apart will be good for us both. I wrote him a letter, telling him how he has made me feel, and hopefully it may bring him around. It would be so easy to just walk away right now, but we do love each other very much, but with people interfering all the time, its going to make our process of working things out, that much longer to do. So...If you love your man/lady, so much, work on it. Don,t let anyone/anything get in your way. Fight for what you want, and keep the faith alive, talk to eachother, don't keep secrets anymore from one another and go slowly, step by step, and you should overcome any obstacle you both may face in the future...I am hopeful that our story will work out in the long run. Not everyone is always the cheater time and time again. In my case, there are just far too many people without a life of their own, so they feel compelled to interfer with ours. Karma will do its thing on them some day... I hope... Take care everyone who is facing this problem right now, work on what is the right thing for YOU to do. Just listen to YOUR heart, not what everyone tells you to do...You are your own strength.-reply by Cookamoondance Girl

[iGuest 3]

At the moment I'm in a very similar situation.I was with my boyfriend for a year and a half when he cheated. At first, out of nowhere, he broke up with me without any reason and refused to speak to anyone for days and when he finally agreed to talk he told me he had got drunk and he'd cheated on me with a girl he had met at a club. He sat down and cried infront of me and I just stood there. I don't think i've ever felt so betrayed in my life. Obviously, until you've been in the situation it's hard to understand what thoughts would go through your head. All of my friends went mental when I told them, because it was not like him at all to do anything like that. They weren't happy when I said I was going to give him another chance but like I said, you can't understand until you're in the situation.Now, we're both finding it really hard because he knows i've lost all trust in him and we've both got it in the back of our minds. But what it comes down to is; do you want to loose that person? Yes, you'll feel betrayed, hurt and angry but when you calm down you need to ask yourself if you love that person. You're not going to look weak if you take them back. If anything it shows how much you love the person, how understanding you are and how hard your willing to fight for the relationship you had. Yes, it's hard.Yes, it hurts.But if you love them and they're truely sorry.Those moments you had before will return and the pain will eventually go.