What Would You Want Your Chid To Become?

[ritu 1]

With a child coming into the family, a lot of joy comes in and comes in the planning for that little thing. The parents can barely live the joy of having a child, they start to discuss what their child is going to be. By the time the child reaches the age of two, it is made certain what he/she is going to become. Actually these parents dream of fulfilling their aspirations through the child, obviously for their kid's well- being , or they might have come across a successful person in a particular field, and they feel that their child would also live a life of that grandeur only if he followed the same profession, the restlessness of the parents is merely out of concern, but the child's preference somehow manages to run out of their concern. Very lucky are the kids who receive the support of their parents in pursuing their dream,is it a kind of insecurity that circles the parents? Probably they wish to see their child prosper, but how would they do so if they fail to excel? Their interest should guide them to excellence. Many fields which are doubted on like getting into the art industry.......following music, painting, performing arts are all right when taken as extra-curricular activities, but a full-time career is not approved of mostly, these professions might involve a bit of struggle but with dedication and constant efforts one would manage to succeed. They can be supported by acquisition of professional training and most importantly wholehearted encouragement of the parents.So, as a parent which way would you choose?

[sheepdog 10]

Sadly, I'd say nearly all parents push their children into the direction that the parents wish them to go. Irreguardless of the childs interest or appitude in that department. Not sure why it's like that but it is for the most part. I suppose the parents do have the childs best interest at heart, they want their kids to have a better life than they did, so they might try to influence them not to repeat the mistake the parents might of made, or the parents have been successful in whateve they endevored to become and so they think that is the best course for the child. Rarely is the child given a chance to decide for themselves. Often the parents are blinded to their childs natural inclinations. They might notice how far the child can throw a ball if they are hoping for a profesional athlete but not even notice that the child can totally dissesemble a toy or some household item and put it back together again in the right working order. I think one thing a parent can and should do is at least make sure the child has a well rounded education. It may not make a lot of sense to force piano lessens on a child for 6 years who only wants to draw pictures, but a few months worth of lessons may be a good idea to give any interest the child may not of realize they had to surface. The more exposure a child has to different things the more well rounded and intelligent they will become as adults. Just because a child isn't a profesional piano player, that doesn't mean they wouldn't enjoy a concert or music which they may not do if they weren't exposed to it as a child. People have more appreciation for things if they know how difficult those things can be. So, if I had the job ahead of me to raise a child, I would try to find a balance of the best of both worlds. Try to play up to and encourage what the child showed inclinations towards, but also encourage them to seek out and experiement with other things that they may not even realize they are interested in until they try them.

[zvez45 0]

It is very difficult, you always as a parent want the best for you child.

[Iniyila 2]

I agree with "sheepdog" , most parents force their children to become someone they want and in most cases they want their children to become someone that themselves didn't ! but we should remember that this is not so bad either, because most children now go after things that hasn't any benefit for them. some of them try to create a music band and they fail after 4 or 5 years , but we don't live too much to waste many years of it. It is good to experience different jobs and different lifes but you need money for that which most children don't have.The problem is that most parents now in Europe and US force their children to go after work after they become 18 and there are many rare ones that send their children to university. I found that this is done mainly because of money that should be spent for them to go to university. This is a big problem because as we know most children hate school and only some of them are really interested in high educations now if those little numbers fail to do that because of their parents then society will face a big problem and as we can now see many scientists in US and Europe are not European or US citizen ! and they have came from other eastern countries because in eastern countries parents support their children a lot more and they even support their children until age of 30 and more !I don't have a child yet but when i had i will support him/her if he/she wants to continue education until anytime that he/she wants. Because i think with academic education there will be a better life for him/her. And of course i will not force my child to continue the education but only if he/she continues the education will get my support otherwise should look after a job after 18. You may say why ? my answer is simple , lets say that someone wants to be a singer, I know many people that tried and failed , it doesn't mean that you should not try but you should always be realistic a little because this is a real life and not a game that you fail and then restart from the last checkpoint ! it is not just that easy but I know if you get higher educations in the category you want like say Art University then there will be a more brighter way in front of you.So i will plan what i like my child to become according to his/her interest in a way to continue related education in university but it all depends on my child whether accept my plans and get my support or not, you may say this is somehow a force but i don't think so , this is a way for encouraging persons to continue their education which i don't think anyone on the earth can say it is not good !

[demonboy1990 0]

well I am not a parent but I have ten siblings I believe the only thing a parent wants for their children is that they have good health and are happy, they have a roof over their head and food in them, what other things does a child want, I think I have the question wrong in meaning but if it is what your child should do for a living then as long as they are happy with the job they do then that's all that matters,

[sheepdog 10]

c4I you have the question just right. And you are right, i agree, a parent should be happy if the child is happy with their lot in life. But what often happens is that the parents are steadfast in their determination that a child will grow up to preform a certain task or job and that is how they will make their living, no matter what the child thinks about the situation. I'm sure the parents think they have the childs best interest at heart, but if a persons heart is not into what ever they are doing, they will never be truely happy. Or productive or satisfied.

[demonboy1990 0]

sheepdog any parent who tries to force their child to be something they do not want to be does not deserve to have the title of parent applied to them, but some parents do not mean to try to push their children into their way of thinking but it does happen they are head strong but a child will make up their own decisions and no parent can push the child to be something they are not.

thank you for your kind comment sheepdog by the way and have a nice day (its 05.37am on Saturday so I do not know if it is night or day in Missouri) oh sorry good night have a great night, and to your family also.

[velma 6]

I never had children of my own for several reasons, but having had taken care of several nieces / nephews and cousins it is very easy to understand why Parents do what they do.

 

From teen-hood to adulthood we make many decisions, accepting the consequences that come along with it. The bad decisions really stick to us and all we want is for no loved one to go through what we go through.

 

Parents push their children either for their own gains & future or because they believe that a certain career will give their child the best in the world. Say, growing up in our time, we might see doctors and engineers make the most money while the younger generation sees the Internet industry earn more than medical professionals. It is really understandable, suppose your parent grew up as a simple clerk at a bank, he isn't going to win prizes or respect or admiration or even a raise. He goes through life underpaid and unappreciated, he sees the doctors , bank managers & PhD holders in the family get everything... So, he is determined to set things right through his kid... Make sure his child never goes through what he went through irregardless of whether the child is capable of achieving the parent's dream or not.

 

Really sad if you think of it, humans are the only ones gifted with individuality and we waste it in the name of petty things.

 

I don't plan on having children, but if I do end up taking care of children (I dream of one day opening a nursery school for tots) I would answer all their questions for them, the decision is for them to take but I would ensure they had no doubts or fear of the result.

 

-- OFF TOPIC --

 

Many years ago, a little niece of mine found out that I smoke (I do not smoke or drink in front of younglings)... She really looks up to me so she attempted to get a nicotine habit of her own...

 

Now, I did not want her parents involved since they would not understand her reasons and would react harshly (they are very overprotective and orthodox). I remember taking my niece out for a walk and explaining to her that I had no authority over her body but I did have a responsibility to keep her prepared about the consequences... The problems and limitations smoking brings.. I was very lucky to have such a smart niece She never picked up a cigarette after that day.

 

My extended family has several little ones who are burdened with the fear of the future, their parents worry about how their children will survive in this terrible economy so I often see my siblings , nieces , nephews and grand children pushing their kids a lot hoping that they'll pick up multiple strengths thereby increasing their chances in the future.

 

At the brink of my teenage years, my parents realized that I could not be pushed so they let me float my way, I doubt you have many parents like them, I could have been a garbage collector and they would still be proud of me.. As long as I am able to take care of myself and my own family, it does not matter since the rest will fall in place.