I Am Afraid From Dogs..so ...any Suggestion To Stop?

[web_designer 7]

ok, i know this may sound weird, but it is. yes, i am afraid of dogs,not all kind of dogs but the big size dogs. i only accept these small nice dogs to come near me. but the big ones, no,no,no.

i really want to find a way to be used to them, but i can't hold my self together when a big dog come near me, i right away turn to the other far away side and this always put me in a funny situation.

 

so, i need your help this time, what should i do to stop that and how?

i really didn't have a dog before, so i don't know how to deal with them. i only once have a cat and of course no comparison between them. any ideas or suggestions will be fine, just put in mind that i am really afraid of them and need a reasonable solution.

[rob86 2]

There is nothing weird with having a fear of dogs, and in fact it is my opinion that _everyone_ should be cautious around dogs. It would be naive to believe that someone's pet or even your own is incapable of an attack. Animals are strange creatures and you have no way to be certain how an animal will react to you or the situation. A dog can attack out of fear, and you have no way of knowing what he's afraid of. It could be your hair, the clothing you wear, your voice. This means you should be very careful about your first meeting with a dog. I read somewhere that there is a recommended way to approach a strange dog.. I can't remember that but for example you don't want to stare into it's eyes and you don't want to make wild arm movements at it or stick your hand out to pet it. Basically you don't want to appear aggressive. Relax, Let the dog come to you, and smell you. If it's a dog that runs and jumps on you, try to resist pushing it away. Try to remain calm. Another thing is, you don't want to run away. It is a dogs instinct to give CHASE even if it has no intention of biting.I think you should watch some Cesar Milan's Dog Whisperer., I don't necessarily agree with his training techniques, but he knows how to handle strange dogs. He's calm and confident, it shows in his movement and voice, and the dogs know it. Despite being a professional, you will see he is also very careful when he first confronts a dog.Two important things:#1 Every dog is different and could react in a way you don't expect. Expect the unexpected. NO dog is 100% predictable. #2 Every dog (within reason) has the potential to injure and/or kill. You can see just by Googling videos that even police dogs and other trained canines have attacked for seemingly no reason. The point of this was not to scare you more, but to remind you of the truth. It can take years to gain a trust with your OWN pet, even when raised from a puppy, and even then a wise person should not have complete 100% trust. You DON'T want to be the person who tries to hug every dog they meet. This is much too trusting. It can take a very long time to be comfortable around strange dogs. I have been a dog owner all of my life, and I am certainly very cautious when meeting a large 100lb dog for the first few times.The answer to your question is a simple one. You need experience around these animals. I don't think there is any other way. You want to start out being around puppies and small dogs if possible, or very old and docile pets of people you trust. Throw balls for them or something. You will gain confidence and learn about the strange quirks this animal has. Your fear of dogs only means you are an intelligent person. You just have to reduce the "FEAR" to a "CAUTION". You don't have to AVOID dogs. Just be careful. Let every dog new dog you meet be a new experience. You might find that once you get to know a dog, it is a very gentle and fun creature to be around. Happiness is a warm puppy. Oh, and it might be a good idea to carry around some dog treats if you expect to see dogs. Dogs like people who make food appear. I'm uncomfortable with my cousin's overweight malamute jumping on me (because I don't want to thrust my arms out to shove it-- could be interpreted as an aggressive action) so I distract it with a dog biscuit and it forgets about jumping on me and then forgets I exist. Some people don't like their pets behind fed by strangers, but oh well.** I am not an expert and may be wrong.. this is just my opinion after some experience with dogs and reading a few books on canine psychology / training.

[anwiii 17]

yea, i agree with rob and he gave some good examples how to approach unfamiliar dogs except i highly discourage feeding an unfamiliar dog. that wan't very good advice for a beginner who is afraid of dogs. that's the scarey part though. the unfamiliarity. if you already know a dog is nice and will just lick you, there really isn't that fear anymore. it's the not knowing what to expect that scares you.it's ok to be afraid, but if you really want to face this fear, then the simple solution is to face the fear. it's as simple as that. if the dog attacks and bites, you learn something from it. if the dog just licks you to death, you learn something. my point is, there is no other way to get rid of your normal fear than to just face it. by facing your fear and watching the dog carefully, you will notice patterns in the animal that will dictate it's next move and whether it is friendly or not. believe it or not, even unfriendly dogs can be approached without putting yourself in harms way usually. there are rare exceptions.i used to train dogs. you didn't know that WD. how did you get to be so old and afraid of dogs though? haha it's kinda funny but i picture you walking the opposite way whenever approaching an unfamiliar dog i have handled many dogs and many breeds and never been bit. i am sure eventually sheepdog will see this thread and post here. she breeds dogs for a living.for me, i love dogs and animals in general. my best childhood memories was when i got my first dog. i would try to face this fear, WD because there is a high chance you will pass your fear on to you child or children one day and they will become afraid for no good reason.i would never approach a dog that is wild or off a leash. if a dog is with it's owner and on a leash, it's almost safe to approach because you can ask the owner if it bites. if it doesn't, then start petting it and get familiar with the nature of a dog. they are really good creatures. to me, reading a dog is like reading a human being. just comes natural to me. dogs, like humans have different characterisitcs that you should be aware of. it's not really something anyone can teach you though. it is something you will have to experience and face your fear yourself.to ease some of your fear though, i can tell you this right now....most dogs are friendly.....especially when they are around their owners on a leash. and i would have to say, don't feed a dog because when they are eating is when they can become more aggressive so it's really the only thing i disagree with rob's post if you don't know what you are doing and how to approach dogs.

[web_designer 7]

thank you rob for replying me,i found it very useful, but now you even make me more fear from dogs .

 

but i will try my best to be near them, the small ones first as you suggested and see. my problem is nowadays the weather is so great, so i go a lot to the park. and guess what? always a lot lot of dogs are there and always come near me to play, well i am not that kind of running person and make everybody laugh at me but i still with no movement till he goes away, or change my place. and both ways show that i am afraid of them to everyone and that really kind of embarrassing.

 

for my whole life for a reason or another i always have a bad experiences with dogs, for example not a long time ago, i was jogging in the park, and passed near some dogs and as usual they started running after me . thanks god i stopped and continue walking and they avoided me,the point is my fear is not for no reason, but i really want to try hard this time. thank you a lot rob, i will try to do my best and post my experience here.

 

thank you anwiii, you two , you and rob, give me a good feeling that i am not the only one of fearing of dogs or at least there's a reason. about feeding the dog, it is way for me to do, because i should touch them first you know before feeding them. but i will try step by step.

 

the problem here that most of dogs are with their owners but off a leash. they are running here and there, where their owners sit chatting of eating and leaving the dog jumping everywhere and they are looking nice, i mean the dogs but from far away. therefore i can't trust them. any way i will put your advices in my mind and do my best, just need the courage to do the first step, wish me luck.

[truefusion 3]

Adopt a puppy, one that you know its kind will grow to a significant size, at least what is considered ''medium,'' and live with it. I don't see how anyone can become scared of something they've known for so long. If you have a cat, then you may have to wait till it is no longer with you. Not all dogs get along with cats.

[web_designer 7]

Adopt a puppy, one that you know its kind will grow to a significant size, at least what is considered ''medium,'' and live with it. I don't see how anyone can become scared of something they've known for so long. If you have a cat, then you may have to wait till it is no longer with you. Not all dogs get along with cats.

thank you trufusion for the advice, someone else  give me the same advice and i think it make sense in my condition but right now i can't have a one in my apartment, it is against the rule of the building. maybe i will give it a try if i move to another one.

[web_designer 7]

hi again, today i will post my first experience with dogs after your advices.?so today, i went to the park and was talking to myself the whole way that i would relax and not try to avoid any dog pass me by, and even i would take chances and go to the playground in the park where there are always a lot lot of dogs. i thought myself courageous and i blame you guys because you give me that feeling? .?anyway, all the way things worked fine, well almost, i only avoided one big dog but let the others pass me safely. but all the fun started in the playground, i was sitting there, trying to be calm and relax, when suddenly two little dogs, thanks god they were small dogs not from the big size, decided to play together, jumping here and there. and i knew it, i knew ?they will leave everyone there and jump around me, this always happen to me? ?. so guess what, i didn't even make a one single move till they go away.god, this was really unfair, all of a sudden two dogs and this near, i really didn't know what to do, but of course didn't think of running away, not my style ?but it was a hard moment, anyway, i kinda proud of myself for making a little bit advance. better than before i guess.?this is my first experience ?with dogs, hope i will do better next time, wish me luck.

[anwiii 17]

you are so funny, WD. i can just imagine you as stiff as a statue. you must have gotten mauled in a past life i can't imagine my life without dogs around me. they are such good companions. from my experience though, the smaller dog breeds are what you have to watch out for in my opinion because most are more territorial around their owners so don't let the size fool you the smaller rat dogs are what i call ankle biters. it doesn't hurt when they nip at you, but you still have to be carefull of those smaller dogs. if you ever get the nerve to approach or pet one, approach slowly and let them sniff you. i usually put my wrist out for them to sniff while watching their demeanor at the same time. if the dog is timid or skittish around me, i take more caution watching the tale and the face. i've been chased by dogs when i was younger but from all my exdperiences with animals, i have never been bit. and dogs are certainly nothing to be afraid of if you practice approaching them. dogs like to communicate in many ways, WD.....so just try to pay attention to the signs and what they are saying to you.

[web_designer 7]

well i know it sounds funny, and i knew that many will think like that when i posted this topic. but for odd reason i always have a bad experiences with dogs, not been bite for once but they always surprised me in a sudden and do something unexpected, also i did not deal with them my whole life, at least in approach. so i have a reason i guess, but i really want to get rid of this. so i will try and see, thank you all.

[kleong 0]

While I am a dog lover and have one at home, I still fear if a big (stray or not kept by me) dog approaches me on the street. Thou I won't hide away from them, the sight of them will keep me immediately on high alert, ready to defend in the event they attack. But if I keep a big dog, then I will not have such problem. Likely to see me rolling and tumbling on the floor, having a wrestling match with them.And to overcome the fear, what else better than mixing around with them.

Edited June 9, 2010 by kleong (see edit history)

[sheepdog 10]

Of course I have to weigh in on this one, but honestly, it's not easy for me to understand your problem, and it's hard to give advise in this sort of situation. My mother used to love to tell the story of how when I was just a tiny tot, 2 or 3 years old, one day in town I ran up to this great big Great Dane and hugged it's neck. My poor mom about had a heart attack. Years later I got my payback, we had purchased a new female Giant Schnauzer and I had taken her to the swap meet to walk around and get some socialization. There was a toddler, probably 2 years old or maybe a bit less there that saw her and just went crazy for the dog, ran up to her and threw herself around the poor dog's neck. Poor dog didn't know what to think, she just stood there trembling, but thank god she took it quite well under the circumstances. It was really strange, that little girl was drug off the dog by her parents, but every time she would see the dog again she would cry and try to get to her. Some people are just born to dogs, some are not. (my guess is that child will grow up to be a dog breeder) Developing a fear of dogs doesn't always come from being bitten, if that were the case I'd drop dead of fear if I got within 300 yards of a dog. I manage to get bit on average of once a year or so. (not counting of course, little pups nibbling on my fingers, I mean the draw blood, leave scars type of bites.) Part of the fear of dogs can be from simple lack of exposure to them. The unkown is always a bit scary. It's too bad you don't live in a place that allows dogs. That would be your best bet to get a dog as a pup, probably a medium size dog, but if it was little when you got it you can learn to love it and as it grows so will your confidence. It's virtually impossible to be afraid of a cute little puppy so start small and you can grow out of your fears. Another idea for the meantime until you can get a dog of your own is to attend dog competions, agility type, so you can be around smart, well trained dogs and see how much fun they are. If there aren't any competions in your area, do find someone at the park who has a well trained dog that knows how to play frisbee or some such game and make friends with that dog. It's important that you start out around the right kind of dogs. Dogs can sense fear in humans. A really good dog will instinctivly know to behave around you. We used to have visitors come out from a local group home for handicapped people. First time they came out I was a bit worried, as we had at that time several very large mastiffs in the yard that could of very easily cause a real disaster. It was just the most amazing thing to see how those dogs reacted to the people, they all sat down and stayed very still and just waited in a line to be petted and fawned over. I was shocked at how good they were. On the other hand, one night when some drunks got lost and pulled into our place to ask directions, it was a whole different ballgame. The dogs surrounded the drunks, escorted them to the door, and then right back to their car. I think they were pretty well sobered up by the time they got out of here. But the difference between the two different groups of people and the dogs reaction to them is just the most amazing thing. Dogs really do have a sixth sense about people, those that are good and those that are up to no good. I do have to seriously dissagree with one poster who recomended carrying dog treats and feeding strange dogs. Some dogs take treats very gently from human fingers but there are plenty of others that will snap quickly to grab the treat and may get some finger too. You can't tell by looking at the dog either who is a gently picker and who is a grabber. We used to have a male Doggue De Bordeaux (Turner and Hooch dog) huge scary looking dog that was so careful when taking treats he wouldn't even use his teeth, he would carefully roll his lip over it and take it without every touching a finger, but I have had 10 pound Dachshund that would nearly take your hand off.

[web_designer 7]

thank you sheepdog for your reply, i was looking forward to it. and i knew you will be shocked of my topic since you are the opposite? :)i will keep in mind all your advices and try to do my best.

[anwiii 17]

wd- you just have to face your fear. there is a saying. we are our own worst enemy. fear can do two things to us and we have to decide how we deal with our fears. fear can either make us aware of the dangers without being paranoid, or it can limit us in doing the things that we shouldn't have been afraid of doing in the first place. fear can be both a good or a bad thing depending on the situation and how we look it fear itself.do yourself a favor and don't limit yourself through the fear you have inside. that advice is for everyone. not just you and your fear of dogs. it sometimes seems that being fearfull and not facing our fears is the easy way to live when in actuality, it's harder to live with the fears we hold. facing ones fears takes two seconds while accepting to live with our fears takes a lifetime.

[web_designer 7]

wd- you just have to face your fear. there is a saying. we are our own worst enemy. fear can do two things to us and we have to decide how we deal with our fears. fear can either make us aware of the dangers without being paranoid, or it can limit us in doing the things that we shouldn't have been afraid of doing in the first place. fear can be both a good or a bad thing depending on the situation and how we look it fear itself.

do yourself a favor and don't limit yourself through the fear you have inside. that advice is for everyone. not just you and your fear of dogs. it sometimes seems that being fearfull and not facing our fears is the easy way to live when in actuality, it's harder to live with the fears we hold. facing ones fears takes two seconds while accepting to live with our fears takes a lifetime.

thank you anwiii for the advice, i know that eventually i have to face that thing inside me. but need more courage to take the first step. so i will follow your advices and take things slowly and hope i could get rid of this fear, thank you all for your supports and replies, wish me good luck with my next experience.

[sheepdog 10]

It's too bad you are half a world away. You could come and work with me here at the kennel for a week and I could pretty much guarantee that it would end your fear of dogs. You could just get a major dose of dog exposure in a hurry. Mine are all friendly (except one male Soft Coated Wheaten that does like to sneak up behind you and pinch you on the butt, he really isn't trying to be mean, it's just his way of playing)