Help me

[goog 0]

im getting married in 8 weeks to a guy ive been with for 5 years and had two kids together. many times in our relationship ive thought about leavign but have never done so as i love him but dislike a lot of things he does. he isnt a bad person but he has an anger problem and can get angry easy as well as doesnt give a lot of attention to the kids, yells at them, doesnt allow me to see some friends etc. this isnt always as well and he has many good points about him. i have an old friend ive known for 9 years and have always knew there was "something" between us though it was never spoken about or acted upon. we just get along really well and gel. the other guy told me last night that he likes me. and so im sitting here now thinking am i making the biggest mistake by marrying my partner. but im also thinking if i leave what will i be ruining. i guess i just need so advice on what you would do or questions that i need to be thinking and asking

[fermin25 3]

I am tired of this cases. "Your friend" who looks like an angel without any of the your partner?s bad things is only a player. You already must know that a man who is seducing women that have partners are players who see the oportunity to have sex easily. That?s the truth. I am sorry if I am so direct. You have to think not only on yourself but in your kids too. How will the kids feel living with separated parents? You have to think on them too. Don?t lose your time with that "friend" he is only a oportunist and you will sorry the mistake you will commit if you pay attention to him. You have to marry with your couple or leave him and wait for the rigth guy. But your friend keep away from you because he is only behind you for other reasons.I suppose that you are a intelligent woman and I know that you will do the best for you and your children.God bless you.

[Echo_of_thunder 1]

im getting married in 8 weeks to a guy ive been with for 5 years and had two kids together. many times in our relationship ive thought about leavign but have never done so as i love him but dislike a lot of things he does.

Now this really tells the story. If your going to marry this man, you should accept his ways 100% To me and this is only my feelings but sounds as your getting married to him for the kids sake, which is good but you should be happy too. You do not want to enter into marriage and not be happy.

[Nameless_ 1]

im getting married in 8 weeks to a guy ive been with for 5 years and had two kids together. many times in our relationship ive thought about leavign but have never done so as i love him but dislike a lot of things he does. he isnt a bad person but he has an anger problem and can get angry easy as well as doesnt give a lot of attention to the kids, yells at them, doesnt allow me to see some friends etc. this isnt always as well and he has many good points about him. i have an old friend ive known for 9 years and have always knew there was "something" between us though it was never spoken about or acted upon. we just get along really well and gel. the other guy told me last night that he likes me. and so im sitting here now thinking am i making the biggest mistake by marrying my partner. but im also thinking if i leave what will i be ruining. i guess i just need so advice on what you would do or questions that i need to be thinking and asking

Well, like Echoe of Thunder said, I think that you should only marry this guy if you are 100% in love with him, and can accept all his ways. However, from you text and post, I would advice you NOT to marry him, and this is the reason why...

 

"but dislike a lot of things he does"

- This isn't good, as when you get married, you're meant to be extremely happy and confident that this is the person that you want to stay with for the rest of your life. But if you have doubts, even after five years, you should think again and reconsider your decisions.

 

"he has an anger problem and can get angry easy as well"

- You make him sound like one of those people that will hurt their wives. You should stay away from men like this, because if you cannot control his emotions, who knows what he can do? He can hit you, shout you, throw things at you, and do all the things that an angry and out of control man can do.

 

"doesnt give a lot of attention to the kids, yells at them"

- Well, OBVIOUSLY, he doesn't care for them. And that means that YOU have to care for them... alone. What kind of partner is that? The only reason why people pair up isn't only because of love, but also because they can both share the task of raising their children up and bond together like this. If you doesn't care for your children, then he isn't a suitable father, meaning that you won't help you when you need help in raising and taking care of your children.

 

"doesnt allow me to see some friends"

- We can see from this that he is obssessed about you. Have you heard of those relationships where the male dominates and will hit his wife when a random guy on the street looks at her? Well, I can see that he is one of those. And let me tell you... I'm guessing that he doesn't let you see male friends especially, right? To be a good partner, you should respect and trust your own partner, and let them hang out with whoever they want. His friends should be your friends, and your friends, his. If he doesn't let you see your own friends, tell him to go away, because it WILL be the biggest mistake of your life marrying him. Trust me on that.

 

"the other guy told me last night that he likes me"

- Catch the rescue line!!! Marry him!!! Well, OK... that was a be fast. But I mean, if he like you, you should go and tell HIM about your fears, and if he truly loves and like you, he will tell you what he thinks about it and asks you to go out with him. So then, you don't really have to reject your first partner because you will already have another!!!

___________

 

What I mean is, if you marry this guy that you don't really truly like, then you will make the biggest mistake of your life. And I mean it. He will be obssessed in your activities, ring you up every five minutes just to see where you are, not let you see other people because you "supposely" belong to him, and he will hit you, beat you and not care for your children if you were to marry him.

 

All the warning signs are there!!! Beware!!!

 

Also, there's just one more thing I would like answered... How did you get your children? With him? Is it his? Or did you have another guy a few years before and had them with him?

 

ONE MORE THING:

I see that that was your first post ever in Xisto... Welcome!!! I hope that you will like your time here, as we are a very (or as I find it) helpful community dedicated to help other people out in building their first webpage and website.

 

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So, how do you earn myCENTS? Well, just post here, the bigger the better and the more myCENTS you will earn!!! But please, don't SPAM or copy material from other sites as the moderators and administrators that partrol this site will take them off, edit them, or move them, and it will cost you a lot of myCENTS just by doing that. So remember to read the FAQ and the rules!!!

 

Again, welcome to Xisto!!! I (we) hope that you enjoy your stay here and that you will stick with us in the long term!!!!

 

Cheers, Nameless_