Strippers

[mzwebfreak 0]

First, sorry to the admin if I am not allowed to post about this kind of topic, but I couldn't find anything in the rules, though I may be interpreting them wrong. Anyways, here's my little rant about my profession. I am a dancer and have been one for the past three years. I dance- nothing more. I don't feel that clubs are the proper place for the kind of things that I get asked about a good portion of the time. (To keep this post under Xisto guidelines, I will refer to those things as extras.) Anyways, I'm sorry, but what is up with every Johnny come lately that walks in off the street automatically assuming that, because I am a dancer, that that must necessitate that I will give extras. HUH?!? I am an adult performer, there to entertain people and give dances, not act like I work in videos, if you know what I mean. Why do people assume this? Is it because of the fact that it's how we are portrayed in the media? Is it because they might have been more successful in other clubs or in other cities? What could possibly be the impetus for men to automatically assume that you will 1) do it and 2) want to do that. I'm sorry, but I don't even like people trying to, well, suck. EWWWW! Not only that, but I also have issues with people that think that just because they've paid for me to dance for them, that they get carte blanche to do whatever they wish. Since when was that part of the agreement? But, I think that I have figured out the two catgories that customers inevitably fall into: boys and gentlemen. The boys think that everything is a right, but gentlemen understand everything is a priveledge. What do ya'll think about this?

[ill 0]

Is it because of the fact that it's how we are portrayed in the media?

47405[/snapback]

I think that's your answer right there. And some people are just.. stupid. If you did give 'extras' just because we paid you, you wouldn't be a dancer, you'd be a prostitute or such..

[no9t9 0]

I know a couple of women who used to be in that line of work. They tell me that some clubs are worse than others. It all depends on the girls you work with. I hope you agree that there are indeed exotic dancers who DO sell extra's once they are in the back room. The percentage of girls who do sell extra's are the ones sending out the message that this is "normal". I don't know what the percentage is, but it isn't negligable. This is where the reputation comes from. Obviously not JUST from this, but it does play a part.. In addition, in some clubs this "extra activity" is more "acceptable" than others. Some clubs have a policy that if any "extra" stuff is happening (on or off site), the girl will be fired. Other clubs will turn a blind eye to those types of activites.Edit: I forgot to add, it is not the same in different countries.

[Wark! 0]

Yes some people find it gross, me included, but sometimes these women that are forced to go into this line of work have no other choice. It's an easy way to make money. Because there are always people who are gonna pay for that. But fortunately if you are not one of those people that hires these women, then it's not one of those sort of things that you see all over the place. So if you don't like it you are fortunate that you are not gonna have to see alot of it...

[Drumman 0]

Yes some people find it gross, me included, but sometimes these women that are forced to go into this line of work have no other choice. It's an easy way to make money. Because there are always people who are gonna pay for that. But fortunately if you are not one of those people that hires these women, then it's not one of those sort of things that you see all over the place. So if you don't like it you are fortunate that you are not gonna have to see alot of it...

47489[/snapback]

Did you even read the first post?

[Dooga 0]

There is nothing wrong being a stripper. It's not anything illegal, and I don't think they should be critisized. I don't think being a dancer is bad at all. As a matter of fact, being a dancer is good because you can exercise and have fun at the same time, not mentioning that you get fans too! Just be happy! ~ D O O G A

[Milk 0]

^ haha, you're so lighthearted about the subject o_OStripping is an interesting profession. Maybe I should look into it? jk.But yeah, a lot of people go in there thinking that because many people don't see the difference between them all. Everyone has confused two different, but similar words and has made a fool of themselves. All you have to do is take your heel and kick them in the face. >_> This is off-topic, but might as well bring it up. I heard this one story of a stripper who was followed home by like, 3 guys. She got raped or something and I just found that really sad. Like, has anything like that happened to you? Some sick guy wanting more than what they paid for? Just wondering.

[s243a 0]

It?s unfortunate that you have to put up with that you have to put up with that. The striping profession is a double edge sword. It gives woman an opportunity that is not available to many men but it comes at a cost in terms of how other treat them. I really which more men respected woman better. I am curious, if a man is a gentlemen but offhandedly indicated that he would be interested in more sometime would that bother you as much?

[Music 0]

I believe it is most definately the "How they are portrayed in Media" thing. Also, very true on the subject of Gentleman and Boys.

[Music 0]

I believe it is most definately the "How they are portrayed in Media" thing. Also, very true on the subject of Gentleman and Boys.

[mzwebfreak 0]

This is off-topic, but might as well bring it up. I heard this one story of a stripper who was followed home by like, 3 guys. She got raped or something and I just found that really sad. Like, has anything like that happened to you? Some sick guy wanting more than what they paid for? Just wondering.

47571[/snapback]

Well, actually, I think I've been pretty lucky in that aspect, mostly, I believe, for one of two reasons. Firstly, unlike most girls in this business, I work the day shift (monday thru friday 12pm to 8 pm). This means I generally get more of the people who are there simply to go to the club, though I do get about 20% of them every day asking to take me out to dinner and variations on that theme. But, I think the other reason why I haven't had anything seriously bad happen is that I make it a point to clearly outline the boundaries to all my customers and also I never actually go straight home when I leave work. I also don't ever tell people where I live.

[squishybear 0]

true, media has a big part on it. and the reputations are ruined and since generally, especially in our country, strippers are thought to do extra things... and they are judged already. luckily for some countries, i think, they are classified to their job as is. Maybe its also about lack of education... or just their attitude!

[Trystim 0]

well there are many aspects to the term exotic dancer when people hear it / see it. I have gotten to see both sides having been a bouncer/doorman at a club that had exotic dancers.1) Most people that come in there are usually pretty decent we had it posted all over the place that dancers can touch the patrons but patrons are not to touch the dancers plain and simple any deviation from this you got confronted. 2) The media always has a bad habit of putting the negative spin on anything as long as it makes news and brings in ratings they don't care who it hurts and why.3) When i was a bouncer at this certain establishment I knew where all the girls lived simply because it was an accepted part of the job to make sure they got home safely being that the club didn't open until 4pm in the afternoon and closed at 2am. 4) Some girls were known at a club not to far from the one in which i worked to give "extras" in the backroom and some patrons would come in male and female alike and be looking for similiar treatment not realizing we don't condone anything of that sort in the club.5) It is those other clubs throughout the areas that tend to turn a blind eye that make it bad for the other clubs and to make not only the style of clubs look bad but also the people who worked there.6) It was the same on Weds. Nights (male stripper night) it isn't just females who get looked at funny in fact it is 100 times worse when it is a guy for that matter so it does go both ways.7) You do the best thing you could possibly do only allow co-workers you trust and the management people know where you reside as well as a number you can be easily reached so they can check on you if there is any doubt that something could of possibly gone wrong.I feel for you if you have gotten any of this bad reputation that has been made given towards you and honestly hope that someday the industry will make face and get a cleaner image as whole.Just my thoughts and known facts from a person who used to work in the enviroment.

[mzwebfreak 0]

Um, one little caveat due to Trystim's post. I was not trying to say that I get these propositions all the time, though I think it may be higher due to the fact that my club used to be really bad about turning a blind eye to what was going on, as he said. But, after they brought back the original General Manager from when the club first opened, I think it's cleaned up drastically. First off, on day shift at least, we all work together to try and make sure that everyone can at least have the chance to try and make some money. We're a closeknit group of probably five girls and we all know how easily it would be to lose our job simply for a little extra money, and I don't think any one of us think it's even remotely worth it. (Plus the fact that you never know when or if the manager at the time's gonna come back and check on you kinda helps matters some, especially when it comes to explaining to the customers exactly why we'll only give them dances.) I personally think that management has a big part to do with the demeanor of a club in regards to extras. If they keep a tight rein on the dancers when it comes to what is allowed, it makes it easier for the girls to say no, since they know that management will back them up if worst comes to worst. But, in some of the clubs I've worked in in Tampa, the management either doesn't care what happens with the girls, or they just care about how much money they can pull in. Either way, it hurts the ability the ladies have to say no, even when they want to.