Family Getting Angry For No Reason

[cangor 0]

Hey,So, for starters, this isn't an "I hate my parents thread." I mean, I don't like how they act a lot, but I'm more annoyed at a recurring pattern of behavior in my family...Basically today I have been working the entire morning in the yard while my parents and older brother, who is renting out a room in the house after college, went shopping for some supplies for a home improvement project. They're gone about 90 minutes and the entire time I have been edging and mowing the lawn. I go inside and get a drink, and they come home... I come out to help unload the car and my dad starts yelling at me for leaving the lawn mower out and being lazy and stuff... when in reality I was just leaving the mower to cool before I cleaned it...and he ended up just getting really annoyed and yelling over nothing...and eventually everyone else just got pulled into it and I left.But it just really annoys me how everyone in my family always gets angry over something that isn't even a problem...And they always want to take it out on me.

[A200 0]

Hi there :DThis happens to me a lot too. It really annoys me a lot when I have been doing homework and assignments and my brother + sister are watching TV (they are in uni so they don't have homework or study to do at the moment) and when someone comes to the door or something, they expect me to drop what I am doing and open it, even though they aren't doing anything useful and are closer. What would happen if you went back to lawnmowing when they arrived, would your dad have said that you are not helping and get angry? If so, then that is a difficult situation. Damned if you do, damned if you don't

[Bluebear 0]

My parents are like that sometimes too. My mom always complains and says that I do not do anything in the house, but I do! How can I know that she needs help with something? I am not psychic, and when she asks for help I always do. I always help them with things they need, but the few hours I do not help them they get angry, complain and tells me that I should help them more. They think they do everything around here! Arg, annoying. The thing with me is that if they complain a lot (and then I mean a lot, because they always complain.) then I will just not help them. It is okey to tell me if I am doing something wrong, but when I do everything correctly and still they yell at me; I just go somewhere else. Then they have to do everything by themselves. Even though all my other siblings is older than me, I do more then them - and my parents do not get as angry at them as they get with me. On school-days I often make dinner, I clean the house and do the laundry... then there is my homework, which I of course need to get done. Some things are just hard to understand. Maybe I behave like that with someone else? I mean what do I know. Because my parents does not seem to understand the fact that they are like that with me.

[anwiii 17]

doesn't sound to me that your dad was specifically mad at ya. sounds like one of two things to me. either he had a bad time when he was out and took it out on ya which would have been wrong to do, or he knows your bad habits and assumed things that weren't true at the time. i hope if it was one or the other, it was the latter because if you don't have any bad habits, why the heck would he throw a fit right from the start.if that's the case, he needs to keep is own self in check. and anyway, bad habits or not, kids are kids.he doesn't hit you or nothin' does he? sounds like he has a bit of a temper and stress problem if this isn't the only time something like this has happened

[yongjja 0]

Ugh my mother does much worse than that. She claims her conditions aren't good and she shouldn't be yelling but even on the phone when she's talking to someone, she yells. She solves all her problems by yelling. What should I do?I come home from school and she looks at me in an angry way all the time. I say how was your day mom, but she takes this as an insult and tells me to shut up and go do my work, so I go ahead and do so. I come home from school at 4pm and I stay in my room until 3am studying and reading my books. I'm tired so I want to sleep so I turn off my lamps and aquarium lights but then my mother charges into my damn room and yells at me for being lazy. Lazy? I'm sleeping at 3am in the morning because you want me to woman!I tell her I have lots of things to do tomorrow so she gets angry and yells at me for 45 minutes every night. This is routine daily.After shes done, she slams my door and wakes my cousin. She assumes my cousin is still awake but the truth is she woke him up with her yelling and she goes in there and yells again for 45 minutes. So there I am awake until 5:30 in the f-ing morning awake and when she finally sleeps, I go to sleep which is usually around 6am. I have to wake up at 6:50am for school, so I've been sleeping for 50 minutes for a month and a half. What should I do? My friends don't know what to say and other adults think I'm overreacting.And sorry if I used some bad and inappropriate language. 16 years of life, and I've never used this many bad words in my life.

Edited January 14, 2010 by yongjja (see edit history)

[anwiii 17]

some people live a lifetime without ever knowing their parents. which is a shame. parents aren't superman or superwoman. they are human just like the children they create.i would try to get to know your mother and let her get to know you. sit down with her and try to understand the problems she is dealing with her own self. i know you don't like what's going on, but you can still show her the love she deserves....as you deserve as well. it's there. sometimes people have to look a little harder to find it.

[yongjja 0]

Well yes, I can often see her problems because she's going through this one cycle, but she has to express herself by screaming hitting and yelling and I'm not sure if she notices she often goes overboard. Like yesterday after school I had to attend a study group with two friends and I told her before. She told me I never did tell her and I asked my other siblings and my cousin if they heard it. They said they did hear it and my mom exploded. She drove me to my friends house at the speed of almost 92 miles per hour. Not only that she called her friend to scream about her problems.... When I tried to get off, she just speeded and the door slammed onto my leg which hurt a bit and not only that I tried taking my bag out when I opened the trunk and she just speeds off making my cello fall and get a few scrathes and a crack that is quite noticeable. It might be just me but I think she did remember that I told her because when I got home, my mother was silent and just ignored me.

[Zagubadu? 0]

Are you sure you didn't make this thread about my family? Yea this is exactly what my family does, getting mad over nothing. I also hate the old "Because I said so". I always need a reason and that never cut it.

[yongjja 0]

Ok today I was studying for the SAT and my mom seemed to be bugging me on purpose.She was eating cake, more like making grah, mrah, ermmm, mmmm sounds.I ignored that sound and decided to try again without being so irritated.She then starts making sounds when she drank water like sip, AHHH~I told her please quiet down, I'm taking a test and she comes up to me and slaps me.I said I'm sorry and she hits me again.She goes on for half an hour yelling and hitting me while I'm trying to concentrate on the test.I look at her in the eye and she slaps me again.I stop completely and tell her I'm sorry one more time and she tells me three things.1: You're not going to make college, stop trying you son of a b****.I was hurt by that.2: She tells me to finish my test. She didn't just say finish the test, she told me finish your "f***ing" test.3: I'll give you ten minutes to finish your test. (Takes about three hours). The total time I've taken on it is around an hour and she gives me one hour and ten minutes to finish a test even the most intelligent people get around 2300.

[mra550 0]

wow this topic is far away from the present (2008 post date) but still getting up anyway I am going to post here sincesomeone hook it up mm about the Parents how did you say that they are getting angry without any reason? yes theydo have a reason to get angry from us because we are young and we dont know what are we doing and sometimes theydo get angry for our own rights.. they know whats best for us and they want the best for us why you guys venting? sometimes they became so strict because they want to protect us but I am not saying that I don't get mad to them.. sometimes yes because I myself only a person they don't want me to do the things I want sometimes and that makes me go mad at them but after all or after a few hours it will be fine again because I will think of "they just want me to be safe"

[anwiii 17]

you knew what she was going to do if you opened your mouth and you opened your mouth anyway. i am not saying you are wrong. believe me, i am one to stand up for what i believe in even if it gets me hit in the face. BUT! you could have taken time out to understand WHY....why things are the way they are. at that moment when you were so deep in your study, and when your mom was doing something which seemed like goating you in to saying something negative about her, you fell right in to the trap. next time, don't fall for the trap. take a break or go someplace else to study. better yet, next time she seems to be enjoying something....no matter how fake, take an interest.

no matter how wrong your mom is, nothing will get solved by ignoring the REAL problems.....

Ok today I was studying for the SAT and my mom seemed to be bugging me on purpose.She was eating cake, more like making grah, mrah, ermmm, mmmm sounds.
I ignored that sound and decided to try again without being so irritated.
She then starts making sounds when she drank water like sip, AHHH~
I told her please quiet down, I'm taking a test and she comes up to me and slaps me.
I said I'm sorry and she hits me again.
She goes on for half an hour yelling and hitting me while I'm trying to concentrate on the test.
I look at her in the eye and she slaps me again.
I stop completely and tell her I'm sorry one more time and she tells me three things.
1: You're not going to make college, stop trying you son of a b****.
I was hurt by that.
2: She tells me to finish my test. She didn't just say finish the test, she told me finish your "f***ing" test.
3: I'll give you ten minutes to finish your test. (Takes about three hours). The total time I've taken on it is around an hour and she gives me one hour and ten minutes to finish a test even the most intelligent people get around 2300.

[Tsukimoon 0]

Hey,
So, for starters, this isn't an "I hate my parents thread." I mean, I don't like how they act a lot, but I'm more annoyed at a recurring pattern of behavior in my family...Basically today I have been working the entire morning in the yard while my parents and older brother, who is renting out a room in the house after college, went shopping for some supplies for a home improvement project. They're gone about 90 minutes and the entire time I have been edging and mowing the lawn. I go inside and get a drink, and they come home... I come out to help unload the car and my dad starts yelling at me for leaving the lawn mower out and being lazy and stuff... when in reality I was just leaving the mower to cool before I cleaned it...and he ended up just getting really annoyed and yelling over nothing...and eventually everyone else just got pulled into it and I left.
But it just really annoys me how everyone in my family always gets angry over something that isn't even a problem...And they always want to take it out on me.

If at all possible, you could have told your father that you were waiting for it to cool. You could tell him how long you had been waiting. Next time, prove that you will do this in the amount of time you said you would this time so they know you aren't lying.

Often, some people come from cultures that don't trust or believe their children. I've seen this problem with my husband's family but not with mine. There also may have been times when your parents didn't judge you as responsible, so they may have been less likely to believe you this time. I've seen this as the case with my husband, who tends to "forget" his responsibilities often. No wonder his family didn't trust him to get things done!

Also, communicate with your family! Find out what they want you to do for the week and get it done early. This way you have your chores done and can spend the rest of the time on yourself. Note that getting everything done early may not be fun at first. But once you see how it feels to not worry about getting things done, it'll become addictive to get your work done early.