What Did I Do? (dont worry, its not as bad as I fear...)

[brainless 0]

ok, this is the situation: About 3 months ago, my former gilfriend broke up with me (for reasons none of the people I spoke to understood - even though these people are usually honest to me and don't hesitate when they have to tell me I'm wrong...). After this relationship I had kind of finished with the sexual contact- and "girlfriend"-stuff (yes, it is possible for a man to have too much of it) and was actually happy living my life without a girlfriend around me; I even made two girls who dared to take the first steps towards me kind of sad that I was not interested in having a girlfriend (well ... I hope I made it clear enough that it was a personal decision of mine, not something about them) - and then I drove into "holidays" to lead a workcamp near Cologne [that's a city in Germany. Don't worry if you never heard about it...].When the late-evening-talks [somewhen in the first days] in this workcamp turned towards relationships and who had left a girlfriend behind, just about everyone learned that I did not have a girlfriend and actually had no intentions to get a new one.Someone in the middle of the last week, I've spent some time in the evening talking and playing cards with a guy and a girl from Poland and shortly after he left to go to sleep, she had some kind of problems with her blood circulation and asked me to hold her hand ... and at some point, we both fell asleep.The next morning everyone wondered why I hadn't been in my bed last night, the following evening she asked me to hold her hands again - and stupid me did it......well, we ended up being a couple and I actually miss her since she drove back to home......and after all this, there is an even more troubling question: Why did I (some people might be able to guess what I mean) end up with a (practicing) catholic student of Germanistics from Poland??? apart from the nationality, all the attributes I just mentioned are something I absolutely dislike ... I could live with student of Germanistics, but a Catholic? a Catholic?!? but I think it's a good sign that I actually cried when she got on her bus back home, I haven't done that for anyone before...(yes, I have lost my calmness and am in a troubled state of mind since about three days and I fear that I can't deal with this alone...)

[shadowx 0]

Its a fairly heartwarming story in a way!I think the old addage "love is blind" is so appropriate. I belive that you love a person because of their soul, (im fairly spiritual!) and deep down it doesnt matter about religion because in my opinion and belief, religion is simply a faith and a deep routed belief and love of a "god" and/or "goddess" And in my opinion, no matter what belive in it doesnt matter, its the belief that counts. So my point is, the fact that she is a catholic, as much as your mind says "humm im not so sure" your heart is sayig "she makes me laugh, and warms me up inside..." And that comes from deep inside her and she could be a catholic or muslim etc and her soul would not change. I would also not usually go for a catholic but then i couldnt say that i definately wouldnt because love is simply acceptance of someone else and obviously the liking of them (obviously "liking" doesnt cover the word "love" but you get the point!) so aslong as she accepts you for who you are, loves you for who you are and you can easily get along and possibly live together, that fact shouldnt matter atall!And i think its really sweet that you cried and miss her, it shows that you could/do really love her and she could be the one. Nationality, beliefs, studies, hobbies etc... are simply a skin that a person wears, the soul is the important part, and as long as you can accept those things there is no reason why you cant love her. and the important thing is not to tell yourself youre not allowed to love her because of any of those things but to let your heart decide wether you do or not, and if you do love her then you two could really get it together and if you dont then you can stay good friends. Its a win-win situation!Good luck with it all and i wouldnt worry too much about any of it! I understand about not wanting someone, im at that stage now, why do i need anyone?! But if someone this special comes along you cant let them walk by!What makes you think you cant deal with this alone? and what cant you deal with?

[TypoMage 0]

What is with this I mean everyone is having relationship problems. How about you just do not get into a relationship unless you know it is going to go on. I mean there most be like a hundred of these posts.

[brainless 0]

typomage: because it can be something beautiful and acutally I don't _know_ that it will be going on (because it's kind of not possible to tell about the future with 100% accuracy) but I just suppose that I'm not going to break up......and during my thinking last night, I came to the same conclusion as you, shadow - I'm actually living what I preach <_<anyways, I'm not sure anymore what I was thinking about when I typed "I can't deal with this alone" but last night it felt kind of right to type this o_OI suppose I just had to let out that it hurts me to be separated from since three and a half day but I kind of cheered up when I received an eMail from her this reading she got home safe and would like me to visit her ASAP ("and if you can't find a way to come to Poland, I'll have to come to Germany again..." )

[tuddy 0]

I think the position you are in is easier then the one i am in. Yesterday, just totally random, 2 chicks asked me out, now, normally i wouldnt worry to much, but these two are sorta friends as well. I'm meeting them at a friends place, and i have to decide who, if either, i want.Its was easy to begin with, i had the choice between a chick with a baby, and a chick 2 years younger then me, then i went and kissed the one with a baby, which complicated it more. Such is the life of GOD!

[lilemi 0]

Well, you did it by gut feeling which can only be a god sign. Do you still have contact details? I mean, you can still talk on the phone and such if you want to keep your relationship slightly afloat. Was she the type of person you could talk to or was she cool in other ways? It's important to be able to talk to someone, even if you only knew them for a short while.

[kuuldot 0]

God aint got nothing to do with u kissing the chic with the baby... attraction might be the culprit. Lets not spiritualise what's obviously physical. U like the chic, that's it!Brainless, you like/love the chic, c'mon go after her... "the dream you dont fight for will come around and haunt you the rest of your life"(quote from Dumbledore - Harry Potter)