Online Love

[Sweety 0]

Wow, where can I start from??? Please read my case and don?t get intimidated by the size of it ok. Well I met the love of my life?my first love on Sunday, February 12, 2006. I was bored so I decided to go online to research some things. Eventually I ended up at a Spanish chat room out of curiosity cause I had never been to one before. I?m looking at people?s public conversations and when I?m about to leave, bam bam I receive an IM from this guy. He?s from Mexico and had turned 17 in October and I?m from the Dominican Republic and was going to turn 17 in May. We had common goals and morals, same taste in music, and we were both so silly??it was an awesome conversation. I hesitated in giving him my sn when he asked because I never thought we would talk again. The next day I came online and omg he started talking to me. As time passed we became close close friends to the point that he told me about his past relationships and family conflicts in the past. I told him everything about me too?that I had never had a boyfriend because I was afraid to fall in love and about my problems too. We knew each other?s secrets and how we were feeling without even saying it. He would write to me every day, came online to talk when he had time, and actually cared about me. We would always play around and make jokes?.lol?. Then during my Easter vacation in April I was one of the few chosen to go down to New Orleans for volunteer service cause of Katrina. We had to say our good-byes cause we weren?t going to talk for an entire week?.which by the way was a lot of time to us since we practically talked everyday. And I couldn?t say bye to him?.I just couldn?t, but instead said see ya later. I cried and became so so sad, but I didn?t know why I was feeling this way. When I was down there I kept a journal of my experiences and I would write a small part to him every night before I went to sleep. And on one of those nights the girls decided to have a talk about guys?.they went around the circle and then it was finally my turn. I didn?t want to say anything since I?m very reserved with these things but you know how girls are, so I just said a bit about how a great guy he was?caring, honest, gentle, funny, cute, smart, and sensitive?all that I had ever looked for in a guy. But I said it with a smile and I started blushing, that was when they told me that I was deeply in love with him, but I denied it. I went to sleep that night thinking about what they said and came to the conclusion that they were right?.I had fallen in love!!! In my head I couldn?t be in love with him?it wouldn?t be possible?it could never be, but it was a little too late. When I came back home we told each other that we missed one another so very very much. A few weeks later, I went to camp in Connecticut and we had to be far apart again. But before I left to camp I needed to tell him something?that I was in love with him?he knew that I had a crush on a guy but he didn?t know who it was, so I confessed that he was that guy and that it had turned into something more meaningful: LOVE. I really didn?t expect nothing from him, I just wanted to take it all out. He, in my mind, only saw me as a friend. But when I told him everything he told me that he suspected it was him by the way I would talk to him but he never said anything cause he wasn?t sure of it. He told me that he was feeling the same way and was slowly falling in love with me. Now it?s August and our love has grown so so much, but there?s a problem. I live in New York and he lives in California. Time wise we have worked it out even though I am 3 hours ahead of him. When he comes from work I wake up to go online to tell him that I love him, ask him how his day at work went, and to say goodnight?these conversations last quite long and I sometimes feel bad cause he only gets to sleep 4 hours the majority of the time, but he tells me not to worry about the time b/c he loves talking to me. We have such a strong commitment that we promised to not have a relationship with anyone else. We are planning to apply to the same colleges so that we could finally be together, either I go there or he comes here. But we have to wait one more year and my mom doesn?t want me to go that far to college. And on top of that she found out that I?m talking to a guy online and she wants me to end it. But I love him with all my heart and he means everything to me and I can?t just stop talking to him. So I?ve had to continue chatting with him online and by phone behind her back. But just how long can this secret last? I love him and we promised to try and be together and that we would love each other no matter what were to happen. I need urgent advise?some idea on what to do. Thanks for listening to my story!!!

[pixieloo 0]

I think that online love can work, but for me, I'd have to meet the guy first, face to face. And I'm skeptical about talking to strangers online. Your story sounds really sweet though. Have you met him in real life yet? Maybe he could apply in New York, instead of you applying in California. Maybe you could ask him to come visit New York, so that your mom can meet him. Then maybe she'll let you go to his collage.

[savge17 0]

Online love to me is stupid, IMO you cant love someone unless you have meet them face to face.. Love on first sight like they always say.

Edited August 15, 2006 by savge17 (see edit history)

[midnitesun 0]

in order to love some one you need to get your whole five senses working , now i wonder how many are working directly when you are chatting with your online girl friend or boy friend , personally i dont believe you can love some one online but as always ther will be exceptions to any rules so i am not going to ask any of you to come up and verify that you had or your friend had an online relationship , it may happen i agree but it wont be the same as when you love some one normally so much for online lovers

[TypoMage 0]

Well I think that most online relationship does not work at all. I mean they could be lieing for all you know. So you never know who you are really talkiong to. It is dangerous

[EnRohbi 0]

S'all very good points.Online relationships are risky as it isTeenage relationships aren't much better.I'm not saying it's a bad ideaI'm in one myself.I'm in Atlantic Canada dating a girl in England *Shrugs*Actually, the way we started out is similar to the way you have.Only I met her about a year before you met your guy <_<Good luck, is my personal opinion, I'd never be able to do it being the one timezones ahead of my girlfriend.I'd never sleep XDI'm happy she's 4 hours ahead of me and couldn't stay up late at night if she wanted to.AnywayI'll be the first one to tell you that it's not gonna be easyIt's not gonna be easy at allI mean... I'm sure you udnerstand that now, but as time goes on... It'll get worse XDAnd better at the same time.That's a strange curse with online relationships.If you take them seriously, they only get harder. But you like them more.I'm not claiming to be some all-knowing god of online relationships.I mean, mine hasn't been exactly completely healthy and great, but it's still itnact, and it's been over a year.Either way... Yeah XD

[Sweety 0]

Thanks for all of your honest opinions on online relationships. Anyhow I just wanted to add that I never chose to fall in love with a guy on the other side of the U.S.A....jezzz if you guys only knew how hard I tried to prevent this from happening, but I guess you can?t control your feelings right. It?s not like I have no life and the only thing that I do is chat with him. I have a job, I?m in the top 3% of my class, have multiple leadership positions in school clubs, and when I get home I?m all tired and have to do all of my assignments, chores, etc. But I always find some time for him even though my schedule is sooo tight. Believe it or not I?ve thought about everything you guys mentioned above long long ago....I?ve even talked to him about going out with other girls cause there are so many after him but he says he doesn?t want to go out with any other girl because he only has feelings for me. I?ve asked him ?Wouldn?t you like to actually have a girl of flesh and bones with you....one that you can have physical contact with....to hold hands, hug, etc.?? He tells me that he would trade all he had to be with me and that he would prefer to have a girl like me even if she?s thousands of miles and miles away than to be with those he sees daily. Please keep on posting your views on this topic....thanks for your time!!!

[tuddy 0]

Ask him what his 'love' is based on? I have been there and done that, starting with this chick other side of the country, and its all built on hopes and dreams that one day you will meet and hit it off together, on the other hand if you dont, life is wasted?I now have a gf that for some reason cant spend more then 12 hours away from seeing (something of which will come to a halt shortly, damn work!), and when we are together, yes we sit and talk, but we both need that contact to know we care for each other!... I think i care alittle to much, i crashed into a tree thinking of her (She was sick at the time!)

[sexymama1723 0]

Maybe it works for other people but not me personally.there are so many freaks on the internet you never know who is good and who is bad.I just don't trust people enough to do that.if I can't find a man where I live then I don't need one.Which I am married anyway so i don't have to worry about that.my neighbor met her boyfriend on the internet and he is a nice guy but I had freinds of mine tell me that friends of theirs met men on the internet and they ended up stalking them in the process.you just don't know how dangerous it is to do that.I have read many stories about teens getting online and meeting grown men and metting up with them than few days later their bodies are found in a ditch or the woods.But anyways I don't judge people so if a woman feels thats what she wants to do that her business

[saiyeek 0]

Really strange. I would also love to have such a girlfriend like you. Its nice. Actually, if it was my case. I would never be serious. I am one of those flirty class of guy and dont believe in online love affairs. I don't think it really works out. i have heard of oniline crimes like some kind serial killers do or some kind of guys do to have a girl laid just to have fun. This kind of crime is widespread. So, think twice before u get emotional.

[sylenzednuke 0]

Well I am 14 so this doesn't really count, I am in an online relationship myself, I love this girl so much but I can never meet her till April 2007 because we both are giving our 10th grade board exams this year, we've had video chats all night long, I had insomnia but she just faked she had insomnia to talk to me...I think you should meet him once and then decide whether you truly love him, just try to go there, if it is not too far as I don't know the distance on some weekend or something and then decide do you really want to go to California for your college so far, just for that guy who might turn out to be totally opposite to what he is online...The girl I like is planning to take up her further studies here after her boards which will be like in June 2007 but I can't wait for her thats why I am going to spend my vacations in the place she lives, I might change my mind once I find out that she was lying everything and she is not what she seems to be online, but yeah do give your relationship a single chance by meeting him but dont just go to California for your college.

[jmpearso 0]

I met my wife in an AOL Chatroom about 8 years ago... We talked online for maybe a year (we only lived 20 miles apart) it took so long to meet cause i wasnt really looking for anything. I was 23 and havin fun with my friends. So a year later she invited me to a party she was going to so I went. Her picture didnt do her justice. She was/is gorgeous. I fell in love there but didnt tell her. We started dating shortly after that and I married her just this year Aug 19th. We waited until she was done with college. But yea I know online love can work. Im not sure about the long distant kind tho But good luck.

[EnRohbi 0]

I had a 14 month relationship with a girl in England not too long ago (I'm Canadian, by the way)4 hour time difference.So I know how it feels.Anyway, it can really go on quite a while without anyone finding out. The girl in England's parents never found out and I've known her for almost two years.Just watch outDon't let things pile up and screw around with the relationship.I know it's not exactly related to the topic you were asking about, but I figured I'd just pop it in here anyway.But, uhmYeah XDPeople started talking to me on MSN and I just lost the train of though Iw as having for this post so it's getting ended a bit prematurely, I guess

[trace-uk 0]

I'd be careful about this.You have to understand something. its easier for girls to fall in love onlien than men. girls are more attracted to personality than guys. For us its 99% about the way the girls LOOKS. So I hope you sent him a current photo and not an out-of date one????Apart from that, well done to you!

[EnRohbi 0]

I'd be careful about this.
You have to understand something. its easier for girls to fall in love onlien than men. girls are more attracted to personality than guys. For us its 99% about the way the girls LOOKS. So I hope you sent him a current photo and not an out-of date one????

Apart from that, well done to you!

o_o

Are you trying to imply that I am not a guy, or that there's something wrong with me?
Cause I, for one, only care about looks for about 5% of why I might be interested in a girl...

I do agree with your general point though, I just wanted to change it a bit
it is easier to have feelings for someone online if you're interested in personalities.
Infact... Unless you're the kind of person who wouldn't even consider a relationship without sex and physical contact, it's easier in all ways to have feelings for someone online, since people tend to be more open about *BLEEP* online.
I mean... It's alot less intimidating to type something than it is to verbally speak something.
The only downside with typing something that makes it intimidating is once you type it, it's there and visible and able to be read back on. I don't think most people think about that though.