Confusing Girls

[darnit 0]

There's this girl i like, its a long story, but here's how it wentI saw this girl in the quad at my HS, and she's a junior to me, so i had no classes with her, so i basically talked to her a couple times, made some excuses to go around her, and asked her to a dance 4th time i ever talked to her, the dance i thought went well, so i told her i liked her, a week after the dance, she replied she's trying to get over another guy, (according to friend, its been 2 years now) so basically rejected me, and my friends told me try to stay away from her a bit, so she doesnt feel like i'm stalking her, and try to get over her, only problem is, i still cant seem to get over her, and its been 3 months, and the more i think about it, the more i want to be with her, we talk once in a while, but i dont see her much, and i really really want to be with her.i mean i read if you really want something to happen, it will happen, in some way or another, but this is just getting to be impossibleIf you have any advice please please help methank you

[agentblade 0]

I know its tough but the advice your friends gave is actually what you should do. The worst thing you want to be doing is to sound desperate and begin pestering her to love you. Not only will she never be friends with you, you'll look as though you're a stalker. So my advice is to wait... Waiting is tough, yes. But that's the only thing you can do right now. Just be her friend, talk to her as and when you can. Ask how she is, show genuine concern for her. She might not like you now but that doesn't mean that she will never not like you.My current girlfriend waited 2 years before I feel in love with her. Initially I didn't like her, nor did I think i'd ever fall in love with her. But somehow after two years of friendship, I feel in love with her. It was a sudden thing also. Now we're together for 5 years already and still madly in love with each other. Patience is a very very good virtue my friend..

[leeleelee 0]

If she has been waiting 2 years to get over the guy, that seems long enough. Go get her - tell her how you feel. See if she is keen at all - Dont worry about friends - go for it.

[heavensounds 0]

Women are very complicated This is just the way it is...the basic difference is that they are a lot more emotional than we are. We put rational part first and they mostly! put emotional part first....This is just so you'll understand why things are not easy with them!About your "problem"...first of all it is something common - we all went through something like this and it is still happening to everyone The thing is that you are sure in yourself that you want to be with her and that means - you should give it a shot!! Just step up to her, ask her to go for a drink and then very easily and smoothly tell her that you like her and that you feel that you should be more than friends...the thing is that if she rejects you there is no problem - you'll know where you are and how the situation is and if she acceppcts than congratulations :lol:This is a win-win situation if you go to her because you'll stop thinking what could be, what blabla....it is better to have things sorted out than leave them open for a long time cos' it'll bother you forever and maybe without any good reason...you'll even miss another nice girl maybe because you won't be open to new relationships in a state like this..SO, go to her, tell her about your feelings and BE COOL whatever she answers, because that will give you advantage- you'll be a cool guy with guts to ask her and she'll think "he is not all winy because I said no" -- you'll grow in her eyes for sure!Good luck mate

[sxyloverboy 0]

Hum your in a tricky situation now. I dont really know so much about yrou situation but from what i picked up she rejected you 3 months ago. Now i dont know what happened in those 3 months but im assuming that not a lot happened between the two of you. Maybe you said hi and stuff while passing each other. Or maybe youve even been avoing each other. Or shes been avoiding you. But i dont know. So what my advice would be is try as bst you can to forget this girl. And the best way to get over a girl is by trying a get a diffrent one. This new girl will be able to distract you from thinking about the old girl and sooner or later youll have forgoten about the old girl. And maybe if your lucky the new girl end up being really nice and you both like each other a lot and you can stay together with her even ater youve gotten over the old girl. Anyways i hope this girl inst to deep in your heart because i know how hard it can be to forget about a girl after the sparks have flown. I remember i had a simmilar situation to this one some time ago. Well i liked the girl but she obviously didint but wouldnt really admit it. So then we were going on and off and on and off for like a month till i had enough and told her to take me 100% or leave it. And she said she'd rather go her own way. I was really sad then but now i think that it was better for me because now shes addicted to cocain and some other *BLEEP* and i dont want to end up like that and i thiink i probably would have if i had been together with he. So all the best wishes from me to you with getting the girl you love or successfuylly coming away from her.

[shadowx 0]

hey!

My advice is to at first, become her friend, im madly in lvoe with a girl but wee just friends (bummer in a way) but its great to have her there.

Dont worry about friends - go for it.

isnt any relationship built on friendship?
If you two become friends then youll have her there for you, all the time, and at some point if you keep showing her your good side she'll come round trust me. girls love a kind sweet caring guy who will take care of them, they're not normally mad about looks so dont bother going out shopping and tarting yourelf up! Just care for her like someone already said. Talk to her alot, if she brings up this other guy dont change the subject ask her about him, sympathise with her, say how hard it must be for her and that you'll always be there for her no matter what. If she gets upset, cuddle her, not softly hold her tight, especially if she cries, hold her tight and rub her back and tell her how thing are going to be fine. Really care for her and she will come arounf and realise how nice you really are and you'll get together, i came up with something that ithink is so true when it comes to things like this "good things come to those who wait, GREAT things come to those who try", so dont just wait. TRY.

[master_bacarra 0]

it's a cold hard fact that she chose someone else. and you have to face that fact and accept it like a man. some people wouldn't want to go down without a fight but sometimes, it's not really a good thing to be messing up with someone who's already committed.give yourselves some space. it would give you some time to think about the situation you're in. trust me, it helps a lot. sometimes, it's good to really let the mind do the thinking. if she keeps on coming back into your memories, try diverting your attention to more important stuff, like let's say your studies. some of the guys i know that went through the same stuff that you did used a different method. they just let their angst out by playing video games.if i were in your shoes, i'll be happy that we are still able to talk to each other, even if it's less than the usual. although, it's preferrable for you to stay away from her, it's not bad if you constantly keep in touch for some time. it would actually help in lessening the blow of that "longingness" you feel when she's not around. and by talking to her, you gain back her trust and you form a different kind of relationship with her. people say that friendship is the best way to start a relationship (better than courting, i might add), and it brings a stable structure if you want your relationship to be strong and stay long. you see, if you become her friend, she would feel comfortable being around you, and you could be around her more. and as a friend, you could be the one shoulder she could cry on. i know it may sound hard, but if you love her, sacrifices should be made. and who knows, one day your patience will be rewarded.

[Zabb 0]

Talk to her alot, if she brings up this other guy dont change the subject ask her about him, sympathise with her, say how hard it must be for her and that you'll always be there for her no matter what. If she gets upset, cuddle her, not softly hold her tight, especially if she cries, hold her tight and rub her back and tell her how thing are going to be fine.

yep girls always wanna be the one girl that made the gay guy go straight.

just a joke relax, seriously though no one knows this girl or you so all advise is only relative.... to nothing.
she may have only danced w/ you outta pitty.
she may think you're hot as hell and nervous to get involved.
she may like soft guys , she may like bad asses so I wouldn't follow any advise on what girls want they're all different.
sounds like you did the best thing and told her how you felt, and since she responded w/ a lame excuse I(me not you) would move on. you'll always wonder what it would have been like if things where ....
sorry its just rambling now you wont listen to any of us anyways. good luck

[grnjd 0]

Try to ask her out again. If she rejects you, then get over her. It seems like the less she wants to be with you, the more you want to be with her.

[darnit 0]

I dunno, i look at other posts, and they all say dont be scared, but eh, still nervous, i asked her once already, i just dont know if she thinks its stupid if i ask here again..

[agentblade 0]

I understand how you feel friend... you want her but you're afraid you might come across as being a pest and desperate... it's a tough choice.. I feel the best thing to do is just be her friend.. most relationships are indeed based on friendships.. Most girls don't want guys that look all handsome or rich, those that want that aren't worth having in the first place.. Girls want guys that show genunie care for them..Like my friend.. initially she didn't like this guy, they were just friends. He liked her but all he did was to show concern for her.. There was this once, they were at a camp and she fell sick. All he did was just to give her some medicine and she fell in love with him after that.. You never know what might happen but I'd rather remain as friends than to make things ugly and lose even a friend altogether..

[Hovit 0]

You don't have much to lose if you ask her again. Sure it might be embarrassing and you might loose a bit of dignity. Look at it this way, it's a song(translater), "There's so much to loose, but there's so much to win, and I want to win."Those lyrics have inspired me a lot with girls. It's in Spanish by the way.

[darnit 0]

Oh, Prom's coming up, and i have to buy bids soon, last time i asked her out was in january for winter formal, I have another friend who wants to go with me, just as friends, to have fun, but this is the one girl i'd rather be with her, you know? and as for the asking part, i'll have to wait and see, pls keep those replies coming, its great to have advice from all of you.thank you

[Wilson Cook 0]

I'm curious to know what happened witht hat situation? Ive been in a tough one like that before loooong ago and she got really annoyed at how desperate I was. So I realized all id done wrong and turned it around. Within a month she was asking me to her room weekly and asking me to the movies, most of the time id reject her to her room to hang out and id never go to the movies with her.

[Johnny 1]

Yeah, it's tough, but your friends are right. I've been in the same situation quite a few times, and I can honestly say that if she says something like that (getting over someone, even though it's been about a year or more), she's probably not interested. No offense.I'd say try your best to move on and maybe try to notice some other girls you've been missing.I could be wrong though, so don't completely give up. Just put it on the back burner.