qingtian 0 Report post Posted September 21, 2004 I just finished writing this poem, it's called 'Away in the Wind' except I couldn't really think up a better title but oh well, hope you will like it anyway The morning warmth flows, whilst waking up,Thinking sweetly, of how nice it would be,To prolong this feeling, of comfortableness,Reminds me of times when you were with me.The morning mist, is cool, yet refreshing,Breathing gently, whilst remembering you,Seasons are passing, as you slip away,What?s now foregone, I wish were anew.The past gradually, lives in my present,Staring blankly, whilst dreaming away,This yearning for, a moment with you,Here by my side, I wish you would stay.Tears gradually, flow down like a river,Quivering slightly, as emotions run high,Missing you is half visible, half hidden,Each tear drop of sadness falls from each eye.The nightly breeze, gently sways the trees,Just by watching, already calmness sets in,Soothing of fears and gentleness surrounds, Reminds me of the nature, you always bring.Sadly, the wind blows away many things,Gradually, life floats along for the ride,The distance grows further and further away,Though you?re on one end, you are with me inside. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wassie 0 Report post Posted September 21, 2004 very nice...i like it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lunaray 0 Report post Posted September 21, 2004 Its nice... The imagery is great. I find that you have a liking to use a comma in nearly every sentence, but thats okay, since i use it a lot as well. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dundun2007 0 Report post Posted September 21, 2004 Very nice i think ill use it for my class poem project, i am just kidding i wouldnt take your work like that without permission. Anyways i really liked it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nosoup4u 0 Report post Posted September 22, 2004 somebody delete this topic before it gets too roudy and out of hand, OMG, its friggin insane Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zenchi 0 Report post Posted September 23, 2004 Nosoup4u, please don't post rude spam.Very nice. I've really got nothing else to say. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
guangdian 0 Report post Posted September 24, 2004 it,s just like Warth wards.I ,m being likely to the Poems Dicribing the Scene Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
deejames 0 Report post Posted September 24, 2004 yeow man! nice i like it.. can i post it in my site? in your higness permission but precisely to be ought from you.. I really admire youre poem... whew... guhs`` lolwould you grant me? ahihijust look at my signature.. that girl I admire most... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
guangdian 0 Report post Posted September 29, 2004 It seems u write Chinese Contemporary peom in EGLISH WAY.A bit amusing!Pay a attention to the differences between them ,My girl, and add rhyme to your poem,follow the basic pricles of peotry ,then ,it must be better.lolo... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
qingtian 0 Report post Posted September 30, 2004 It seems u write Chinese Contemporary peom in EGLISH WAY.A bit amusing!Pay a attention to the differences between them ,My girl, and add rhyme to your poem,follow the basic pricles of peotry ,then ,it must be better.lolo...Excuse me, but I don't even know how to write in chinese yet alone read it, so I had no intention of writing an 'english version' of a chinese contemporary poem - whatever that is. And there is rhyme to my poem, every second line... if you learnt more about the structure of poetry and read more ENGLISH poems you will find that my poem is one of the basics... Anyway, thanks everyone for reading my poetry and for your comments, really appreciated Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lunaray 0 Report post Posted October 1, 2004 Hmm... I actually thought you were chinese too... So whats with the name? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
qingtian 0 Report post Posted October 1, 2004 I am chinese, but I wasn't brought up in chinese schooling therefore I don't know how to write in chinese fluently, but I can speak fluent chinese though and read pin yin. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lunaray 0 Report post Posted October 2, 2004 Chinese as in normal chinese? Do you speak dialect as well? Teochew? Hokkien? Cantonese? Just curious. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
qingtian 0 Report post Posted October 2, 2004 I speak cantonese mainly, but also some mandarin. Are you chinese? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lunaray 0 Report post Posted October 2, 2004 Yes, i am chinese. I live in singapore, which consists of chinese people for more than half the population =) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites