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k_nitin_r

Advice For A Girl In Love Who Cannot Marry Her Love

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Hi!There is this girl who I know. Well, this post should have come from her but she does not really want to seek advice so I offered to get her the help and advice that she needs.It all started one day when she reached out to me and said, "I am not feeling too good."I replied, "Oh, are you running a temperature? Perhaps the sniffles?"Her response was terse. Only three words, to be more precise. She said, and I quote, "I wanna die"That was accompanies by a sad smiley of this kind: :'(I, being a bit poetic and anti-climatic, took the storm away and was a bit too cliche when I said, "Death is over-rated."But, I did add, "Definitely not something you would want."Her spirits were still down, so she just replied with a, "nope"At least that got the dialogue happening, so I thought I could talk her out of what seemed to be suicidal tendencies. "Trust me... the living have it all," I added. Sure, maybe I sounded lame, but I could not really think of anything else to say at the time."I am in a big problem which am unable to solve," she said.I wanted to know more, I wanted to help if I could, so I asked, "What's the problem like?"I felt the need to say something, but the only words that came out of my mouth were, "There's never been a problem that has been too great for prayers and human effort to conquer."She began recounting her tale with a, "Kind sir, I am a brahmin."For those of you who are not familiar with the Hindu system of classification of societal responsibilities, Brahmins are the highest tier of society and are responsible for offering prayers to God and the demi-Gods. Their role in maintaining civilization is paramount and they keep culture and traditions from fading away.It is actually a kind of a prestige to have been a Brahmin, so I complimented, "That's nice."She could clearly tell that I had no idea whatsoever of where this was going, so she explained, "I am in love with a guy since six years"I sensed that this could be one of the common troubles in Indian society. Boy falls in love with girl, girl falls in love with boy, the society does not accept them because of differences in castes, and there begins the problem. So, I asked, "What caste is he?"She replied with a single word, "Brahmin."To me, it looked like the sky cleared up for her and her boyfriend, so I said, "That should work out well."In India, kids typically seek their parents' blessings before a wedding, and for the little matter of wedding expenses that the parents usually pay for. I asked her, "Did you tell your parents?""No, " she replied, "He told his parents. They did not like me.""They dont want this marriage to happen," she added.That was her tale of sorrow, the one that she was willing to give up her life for, and the one that I said she ought to give it a long thought about. There was the possibility that they could get married without their parents' consent, but it did not seem like they could go through with it. There was the possibility that she could end it with him, and marry somebody that her parents would want her to marry, but it did not seem like she was willing to let go. Then, there was the possibility that she could decide to end it all, leaving behind a note of why she took the extreme measure. In India, people do not typically see a counsellor. Perhaps it's just not something that they do because they are in denial of having a mental condition. But then again, telling that what it is, to create an awareness, would be an insult to their ego because they associate just about anything about a mental condition to being mentally challenged (the exact word that would be ringing through their minds is "retarded"), and there simply isn't enough tolerance for something of the kind for them to want to seek professional assistance. Such is the Indian society, and this is perhaps the reason for the high suicide rate in India.

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