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Ho-oh'sRealm

Internet And "real Life" Friends

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Seeing as I've had close Internet friends for ages now, I was thinking about this quite alot. Why do people see having online friends as so bad? Especially if you balance the internet and real life, what is so bad about it?
I find that my Internet friends can help me through some problems my real life friends can't because they have never experienced what I'm going through or just give useless advice. My mum asks "Why waste your life on a chat room or forum talking to people you've never met?" My answer to this: Friends are friends.

True, not everyone online you talk to can be trusted, it's your choice/risk to meet and talk to people online, but still. Heck, the fact that we are even here in these forums is because we wanted to talk and get to know people who share a similar interest in Pokemon, as well as many other things. Also, an online friend of mine left one day saying we were "avoiding reality" - I don't see what's so bad about it, as long as you're balanced (I'm semi-balanced, but definitely not anti-social).

I'd like to hear your opinions on this.


Its often easier to relate with online friends, because you see their attitude in their typing and you don't have to guess by their looks if they are freind material or not. I'm not sure why otehrs would see online friends as "bad."

I've had online friends for a while, and they are easier to talk to then "real" friends at time. They're also more avaliable.

I guess it depends on what a person is used to and their life experiences. You can't make an online friend if you don't trust any part of the internet.

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Well the general public thinks that chatting is unhealthy cause it makes you lazy,fat and antisocial. But "used" with moderation i don't see what's the harm. I mean... nothing in this world that i done excessively is good.Not even taking to many vitamins of too much sports. People have a hard time accepting new things. This is the future. And it's rather cool. I only dreamed of talking to someone from a foreign country and see what's it like there when i was young.The internet means free access to information. How people use that should be their business. If you're dumb enough to waste your life on chat rooms and have no real friends. Fine by me :angel:)Regards,Sebastian

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As soon as I saw the the title of this topic I IMMEDIATELY came to check it out. This is something I've been thinking about, on and off, for over a year now.I had very little experience with chat rooms, forums or other forms of internet communication with individuals (other than e-mail) until I joined a persistent MMORPG about a year and a half ago. I had no idea what kind of relationships to expect to have with people I had never met in person and had a "wait and see" attitude.This past Christmas I got a rather large "care package" of X-mas baking from a family I "met" through the game. I guess they consider me a friend, lol. They live in a different country (about 600 miles away from me) and I doubt I'll ever meet them face-to-face. Even though "Mom and Dad" are young enough to be my kids (I'm also "buddies" with their 10 year old daughter), I feel like they've adopted me, lol. They, by the way, are very cautious about what they say on-line.My personal experiences are that lack of non-verbal communication like tone of voice, facial expressions, and gestures do slow down the communication process. It doesn't stop it though. It just means it takes longer to "get to know" someone than it does face to face. I can see it being a great inconvenience to someone with little patience.I have run across phrases in the posts here like "not everyone online you talk to can be trusted", "the majority of the online relationships (including friendship and others) are based on lies" and "there are all kinds of people out there - some friendly, some sulky, some dangerous, etc". You know what? You are all absolutely right! You know what else? That sounds EXACTLY like the people I meet "face to face", lol. So what was your point again? :angel: In writing this post, I just realized that I don't like they way the term "real life" gets used. When I was playing the on-line game, the game was not "real" but the people I was playing with were as real as me. You can get together with some friends and play cards or Monopoly or something and the game is still not real but the people you play with are no more "real" than in my last example.Personally, I am no more cautious talking to someone in a chat room as I am face to face (notice I didn't say "real life", lol). I am no less cautious either. My thoughts on the topic are pretty close to unwanted_flower's, I suppose. People are people and where you meet them or how you communicate with them is largely unimportant in terms of how it affects the outcome.A few specific comments;To mra550:If the worst experience you have with identity theft is having your picture show up beside somebody else's name in Facebook, consider yourself lucky. I had somebody charge about $800 to a credit card of mine once. I hadn't lost the card and the internet had nothing to do with it.To Zagubadu-:Different people have different definitions of what constitutes "friendship". I knew a girl once who I considered a friend. One person who knew us both described us as "Acquaintances", another described us as "Buddies".To evilsmiley25:I think the "on-line" versus "face-to-face" labeling dilemma is most easily solved by asking yourself "What form of communication do I use most often to talk with this person?". Be careful with this though. We may end up with not only "Real Life" friends and "On-Line" friends but "Telephone" friends and God knows what else as well.To getube:Thanks for the link even though I'll never use it. Some people are uncomfortable about giving out personal information about themselves. I respect that. Since it's not really any of my business where a person lives anyway, I don't really care if they lie to me about it.To Ho-oh'sRealm:The next time your Mom get's on your case, try this (if you choose to),"I have a question that I want an answer to. Nobody that I've met face to face has an answer. Somebody I know who I have not met face to face probably does."

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Actually I make a distinction between Internet friend and real life friend. Though I usually use twitter and facebook to share soemthing with others, seldom are unknown in real life. So totally, I seldom make friends in real life with online friends. And fortunatelly I now live with my frinds I acquaint in the internet, exactly playing dota. And we get along well with each other. A word going "No dota, no brothers" :angel:

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Funny you mention this I have more facebook friends then I know what to deal with. It has taken me weeks sometimes to figure out who is this person. There are some that I don't even know yet they seem to know me. I am embarresed to ask. O well I guess that is the way that it is when it is so easy to reply and what not.

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You can meet up and go out with your real life friends, you can touch your real life friends .etc With Internet friends you are limited to chat, video and online gaming, whilst this isn't a bad thing and I think people frown upon people that let their Internet friends become their only friends or take priority over real friends.I see no problem with it and have made some friends online.

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I think people worry so much about it because there are extremes to every situationI mean you dont see the people who live normal lives and balance everything out on the 6 o clock newsyou only hear and see the people who are "loners" and do not know how to communicate in real lifepeople are terrified or are not even capable of carrying a conversation with someone in person, because they do not know how to, or are not used to iti mean lets face it, it is so much easier to talk and speak your mind over the netthere are no commitments, you can say only as you want.. because over the computeravoiding uncomfortable situations is as easy and clicking the "block" button, or even turning your computer offI am sorry if there are any hardcore video game players reading this.. but i think it is mostly them who have the big issue, they are so addicted into their video games, actual human contact gets lost, and the years past and they are still living with their parents, with no job, no significant other, real friends, sometimes they do not really have educationEitherway i agree with you @Unwanted_Flower, friends are friends, no matter where you find them.. i might only be 18, but i can say i have amazing real life and internet friends.. ive actually met several of them in person, and i think it is completely healthy!

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What's the difference. Sometimes, you have "real" friends for years...after some incident you find out you never actually knew them anyway! Internet and real friends are the same....you never really know someone and sometimes you do! They're both really fine, i think.

and I agree with @gisellebebegirl that it is completely healthy! ;)

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