Losing All My Friends... depressed, confused and no where left to turn

[Allysaa 0]

Like the title and the description say, I'm losing all my friends... I have no idea what i did to them, no one can seem to give me an answer as to what i did or what i can do to try and fix it...
So far what I've gathered is out of 5 suspected friends that hate me 1 is a definate person that hates me. I really can't understand how this happened i hung out with my friend alex every day during summer 07 EVERY SINGLE DAY I'm not exagerating, not only during summer break but basicly from June to November. Then Christmas time came... everything was going as normal, by that i mean all of my friends and I were hanging out on a regular basis. New Years came and most of my friends decided to drink and they didn't have a little, two of them Corey(My freind that i know hates me) and Steve. We were all at my friend Anthony's house and his parents were upstairs, so we tried to keep Corey and Steve's profile low. Then they pulled a whole thing of vodka out of a backpack and started to drink again. My friend Anthony and I decided that it was best if we got the alcohol away from them, so I took the bottle and ran out of Anthony's house to go to Steve's house which is 2 blocks away to hide it. So I'm sprinting to Steve's house on New Years Eve, in a T-shirt, through a muddy feild, with a gallon of vodka. When i notice my other friend Stevyns run up next to me and say "hurry he is coming!" I turned back to see my friend Corey chasing us down the street... So Stevyns and I get to Steve's before Corey and I hide the vodka. Corey comes running up the driveway and asks me where the vodka is, so i told him that we drank it all. He believed us, but then he pulled out his phone and started to call a girl that he liked which he had already made several drunken phone calls to, so i thought that it would best if i took the phone from him because I thought if he liked her that might ruin his chance of a relationship with her. So i grabbed his phone away, and he started slapping and biting me, while telling me that he wanted to talk to her. After a few minutes I finally gave in and let him call her, but before i let him talk i explained to her the situation, apoligized and she seemed pretty understanding. So after the phone call we walked back to anthony's house and both me and Anthony tried our best to restrain Corey and Steve because they were very rowty(i guess thats the best word...) So basicly were that story ties in is that it is to the best of my memory the last time i'd see Corey when he was actually nice to me. As for Alex everything was basicly normal until around the start of volleyball season at my school. Thats when he started ignoring my calls and flat out ignoring me when i tried to talk to him face to face... I've been freinds with Alex for 12 years and i can't understand why he would just not want to be my friend... I mean if i was doing something to make him mad why wouldn't he just tell me or something? Another on of my friends Bob seems to hate me and i'm pretty sure he was about to tell me one time but he stopped in the middle of a word and changed it...

Truely only 3 of my friends actually seem to like me. Stevyns, Anthony, and Larry... Although Stevyns is really close friends to Corey... Stevyns realises that Corey hates me but told me that Corey never really gave him a reason as to why he hated me... Larry on the other hand, Anthony's twin brother seems to be drifting away from me, I really don't know how to explain it but it just seems that I'm losing him as a friend... Last but not least there is Anthony... Anthony... i don't even know how to set into words what he has done for me... he always seems to have my back and be there when I need him... iI feel horrible because i keep pressuring him to try and find out why they hate me because he sees or talks to Alex, Larry, Corey, Steve, and Bob everyday...

Honestly, I have no idea what to do... I'm so depressed i dont want to go to sleep at night because i know that i'm just going to wake up in the morning and sit at home alone all day...

I really need any and all advice that you can give me, I have no idea what to do... If you didn't understand something in there just ask me and i'll try my best to explain clearer...

I truely thank anyone that read that even if they don't reply but to those of you that do reply with advice or anything i'm truely indebted to you...

Oh this is so sad. I dont know how old you are, but I so remember all these situations from when I was younger. I know it's easier said than done, but maybe just be grateful of the friends you have! I dont have many 'true' friends, you just have to realise who's important enough to be in your life. Dont worry, you'll look back on this in a year, when you've moved on and realise what you have learnt.

[inverse_bloom 0]

Yeah this happened to me at the end of High School makes you miserable doesnt it? Before that point i had many friends. Im just wondering are you depressed since your friends have drifted a bit, or were you depressed before that point?The unfortunate fact about depression is most people dont want to hang out with someone who cant smile and joke and "that" could be the problem. Just a thought...

Edited December 9, 2009 by inverse_bloom (see edit history)