How Do I Get Over What I Think To Be My First Love?

[Clarky 0]

I suppose my post is really going to be like http://forums.xisto.com/topic/46959-how-do-i-get-over-my-first-love-who-cheated-on-me/

To some people this may be something they can relate to or understand, others may not. I've been out with this girl for 2 years before, this was when I was about 10 till half way through age 12. Then, she finished it saying she needed space, so I was sort of like ok, but in my mind I new that meant its over -.-

Now, three years later I still havn't gotten over her, and she believes as well as I do that we should both move on, and should have. She says she has, although I just cant seem to do it. No matter who I find, or try to be with it doesnt work out.

I might only be 15 which to some people will seem stupid when I say this, but I believe I love her. Whether its young love or true love she means a lot to me.

[shadowx 0]

Hey there, i dont think its stupid at all, i fell in love at about the age of 13 i think so i can sort of relate to what youre saying and i still feel it after 4 years. The thing is i dont think you will ever really get over it. you will find someone else soon but you will always remember her as the first you loved, and the fond memories you have together and things like that. I think youve gotta remember always that there are other girls out there and you will find another, sometimes it might not feel that way, people used to say that to me and i used to say that i would never find anyone but im sure now that i one day will. Its easier for me because we are really good friends but if i was you i would concentrate on other things in life that you enjoy and almost trying to forget her and enjoy life. You will always remember her but it doesnt mean you wont find another.

[truefusion 3]

The one that ends the relationship is usually the one that moves on first—sometimes at a surprising rate. They say if you let them go and they come back, to never let them go again. But, unfortunately, many do come back but are not accepted. That makes things worse—evenmoreso when you keep coming back, and not just for you; it shows just how attached you are. Your story seems relative, only i wasn't as young as you were when i got in a relationship. One of the hardest things to do is to let go of a loved one, one you may claim to be your beloved. Anger is the quickest—but not recommended—way of letting go. I hope you got answers for any questions you may have had to ask her—some people are left empty-handed... Once you've managed to let go you may realize that you were bringing yourself down for little or nothing. Then you'll realize that there are others out there that will never leave if they get together with you—and chances are they are those who've been through the same things you have.

 

You never know what you have until it's gone—but there are two senses to this. 1) You realize that they were everything or 2) you realize that they have become a new person—one you did not fall in love with. The pain makes people unstable and does not allow them to see what others see—no matter how many times they are told the same things. If any one has told you why you should move on—more than just, "because you should"—i want you to let those words sink in, just enough to see a new path, and probably even a new life. Once you see it, grab on to it. Once you have it in your grasp you'll be able to move on. Until then, i wish the best for you.

[Smack 0]

Well, you need to move on and accept that you do not have any chance with her in the future. Of course, remember that no one ever forgets their first love. The easiest way to get over someone is to find someone else. It may take several tries and several years. But there are many fish in the sea and your bait is never exhausted so keep casting. ;)How much have you talked to her? Maybe if you sit down one day and have a good long talk with her you may be able to let her go.. Or this could be counter-productive and you may just find her so lovely you won't be able to stop thinking of her after this. Do you see her often? If you cut ties with her, the process of moving on will be much easier.

[BluePwNaGe 0]

Wow! First Love!Well i am in a relationship right now.. with my first love. and she meanes the WORLD to me. I am older though we started dating when i was 17 and you were only 10 so you could see love from a different perspective. A first love is NEVER going to go away. You know how people say "You were my first love and you will always have a place in my heart." First loves aren't suppose to be forgotten. Since it was your first experience of love she will always be in your mind no matter what you do. Another reason you possibly aren't able to get over it is because you really didn't have your closure. She didn't give you a real explination i guess you cvan say in lamins terms. Since you only said ok and really didn't seem that heartbroken it bothers you not to know the true reason behind it. Dont get me wrong i am not a psychiatrist or anything but i know. When i even think of being away from my first love i absolutely freak out thinking of life with out her. And how i would just think about her all the time. Dont worry that you can't get over your first love, just remember that you're not suppose to. That ten year old roman e will always have its place in your heart and its meant to be there.

[master_bacarra 0]

it's amazing that you were able to fall in love at such a young age. just 10? in our country, if you develop feelings for someone at that age, people would think it's "puppy love". but i commend you for that. anyway, if she said she needed some space, it really means she's asking for a cool-off in your relationship. you have to respect that decision and you shouldn't go begging for her to accept you again. i would want to advice you to talk to her and tell her that you could at least be friends, just to lessen the blow on your part. this will also bring some closure to your relationship.on your part, i know it's hard to let go. i know how you feel. i remember the song by sheryl crow entitled "first cut is the deepest". it's hard to move on when you had your heart broken and the first one to do it would bring a lot of scars. one thing humans should learn about relationships is that you have to get ready in cases that things might not work out well for you. and i don't mean by getting a back up, i meant by understanding everything that had happened, what you could have done to change things, and learn from your mistakes and hopefully you can move on. on the next time you get into a relationship, you would know what to do.if letting go is hard for you, you might want to move away from her as of the moment and process everything for yourself first. assess every aspect of the relationship that you've had with her. cherish all the good stuff and not the bad stuff, so the next time you see her, you don't have too much baggage on your shoulder and you could face her without much hurt or resentment in your feelings. some people can't move on if they see their ex's so they completely shun themselves out, but this is not good and it would only cause you more resentment and anger. it's not good for you. you have to let go or it would be difficult later on.hope that helps and good luck with moving on.

[velma 6]

Hi,Well I am sorry that your relationship did not work out. I guess she ended the relationship for a reason so dont blame yourself or her, breaking up is a part and parcel of being in a relationship.Now getting back to your problem dont mope,moan,groan,grovel or listen to mushy songs and the think of the "Good times" Dont get me wrong you can think about all the good times you have had but think about it only when you are happy and not when you are lonely for if you think about her when you are lonely then you will end up just hurting yourself. Keep yourself distracted, read a book that talks about the human mind or more more like scientific facts so that there is again no connection between the book and your ex. If you can handle it then you are welcome to read any book you want. When you think that you can look at her without thinking about her in a romantic mindset then you can ask her to be your friend but keep in mind that you have to be rational and logical throughout or else you might get back into your hangover :lol:The main part is that you have to remain level minded,rational,think about your self respect as well as hers,respect her and you will be ok.Dont do anything stupid like going back to her and begging her to get back with you as you will not be seen in the light that you wish.Anyway be cheerful and have fun and give yourself some time and talk to her about this if she is understanding enough.

[crazymind21 0]

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh first lovewell as these guys said before i did, ur first love will never be forgotten,it stays in ur mind forever indeed,its like riding a bycicle,u never forget it.well anyway ,how to get over, is basicly what velma said, keep urself busy,dun listen to slow songs lol, go out alot and meet other girls,i can basicly tell u a story about my first love, my first love started when i was 16,i always was a shy person than so i always did like i wasn't interested,so anyway we endet up going with eachother for, also 2 years, our brake op was more hate than love, but i kept everything she gave to me the letters all the stuff, and i keep it close to me, altho the love is over, ur first love is there to saty, its a learning time, wich u can bring on to ur next relationship,but dude, i tell u know u have to give urself open to other girls, giving them a chance, u said basicly, because ur not over ur relationship with that girl u can't that over with another thats not good, u have to go on,,altho the feelings wil change but its time for u to concentrate on new things, on the future, and leave the past the past.If u do this i know for sure, u will be oke,i'm in a relationship of 5 years now, and i don't think about my first love anymore, altho, if i come across a letter or some from the old days, iwill read it altho i know what they say, its still lovely to have such a memory to hold on to, so don't forget,live on and learn from it all, ur feelings will go away if u open urself for other experiencescheers crazy

[nol 0]

I had a really good girl-friend (not girlfriend, but a friend that was a girl) I talked to for about a week about random things, thats how I got off my first one (trust me it was just a couple months ago, and we were engaged) You never totally get over the girls you really like. Everytime you look at them you'll feel worse. My best suggestion is talk to another girl about it, (because they know how mean girls can be) or become friends with your ex. Staying friends will make you not miss her as much, and still keep in touch with her. Probably the best way. You'll feel crummy for about a week or 2, but you will eventually come to a daily routine of talking to her, and eventually just not be attracted as much. Mostly this is because she will feel more calm around you, and she won't care what you think, so you have a better chance of not likeing her as much. If I were you, I wouldn't wait any longer to try and get another girlfriend. That usually also helps, maybe even get your other girlfriend back. But trust me, theres no real way to get her off your mind, its just a time thing, some things help, but she will always be there, and thats what happens when you truely like somebody. It seems so bad because its your first, but after awhile, whenever you and your mate break up, its just like w/e, im sad but it happens. So it seems like you love this girl because shes your first, chances are you may, its really hard to tell on your first. But later you'll be able to tell if you love her because you get obsessive, and you want to do more. Sometimes thats just hormones.Anyways If I were you I would just let her go. Easiest and fastest way to get away from her. Just make sure you don't screw up and not talk to her anymore, as that can be the worst thing you can do.

[xplorer-ex 0]

i understand how u feel, i ws the same with my ex. i met her wen i was 15 and went out with her till just afta my 18th bday. I no its hard to get over things that play such a large part in your life, but you do need to move on. if u keep on living in the past you cant move forward. you need to put ureselft out there and be open to more opetunities. one day you will meet sum 1 and you will forget all about it. I have met some one now, almost 2 years afta she finished with me and, to be honest, i cudnt be happier. i love her so much and i dont compare it to my past relationships, jus take on borad where i went wrong and learn from it instead of hurting from it.hope this helps youXp10r3r_3X

[garbage 0]

well the best thing I can suggest is simple find you another.. thats going to be the best thing to do, and yes its easier said than done

[cwconline 0]

Awe, It's ok man... Girls will come and go. But it does seem like you have a lot of feelings for this girl. You may just need to tell her that, and tell her excatly how you feel about her. if you cant then i'm sorry but thats the only way i wish you the best of luck,

[kuuldot 0]

Truth be said, no one ever really gets over their first love if it was real. The feeling does go down after a while though but it never really dies.You learn to live with it and move on.