tasty 0 Report post Posted November 15, 2004 I met this guy who said he loved children, then I found out he was on parole for it. - Monica Piper Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together. - Carl Zwanzig When I was a kid my favorite relative was Uncle Caveman. After school we'd all go play in his cave, and every once in a while he would eat one of us. It wasn't until later that I found out that Uncle Caveman was a bear. - Jack Handey I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a dime. By the time I was 14, I owned my own home. - Gene Perret I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don't get on with my real ladder. - Harry Hill I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize. - Steven Wright Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? ...He's a mile away and you've got his shoes. - Billy Connolly I went to my doctor and asked for something for persistent wind. He gave me a kite. - Les Dawson Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin. - Tim Vine Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. - Dale CarnegieAnyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. - Samuel GoldwynIf God did not exist, it would be necessary to invent Him. - Voltaire (1694 - 1778)George W. Bush loves golf because it's like the election .. low score wins. - Jay Leno.We're concerned about AIDS inside our White House, make no mistake about it. - President George W. BushDo Not Wash - this vehicle is undergoing a scientific dirt test. - Bumper StickerMy wife keeps complaining I never listen to her.. or something like that. - Bumper StickerBanks will loan you money, if you can prove you don't need it. - Mark TwainI souport publik edekasion. - Bumper StickerI took an IQ test and the results were negative. - Bumper StickerHonk if you hate noise pollution. - Bumper StickerHere's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like `Psychic Wins Lottery'? - Jay LenoHusbands choosing colors must have note from wives. - Sign in wallpaper & paint storeTime is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. - Hector BerliozHusbands choosing colors must have note from wives. - Sign in wallpaper & paint store Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Evolke 0 Report post Posted April 23, 2009 I met this guy who said he loved children, then I found out he was on parole for it. - Monica Piper I had plenty of pimples as a kid. One day I fell asleep in the library. When I woke up, a blind man was reading my face. - Rodney Dangerfield We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle and if it pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a dime. By the time I was 14, I owned my own home. - Gene Perret Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? ...He's a mile away and you've got his shoes. - Billy Connolly Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin. - Tim Vine Haha very nice quotes. I quiet like these four Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Alex Cicala 0 Report post Posted April 23, 2009 The only funny one I know without google:"And what's the real lesson? Don't leave things in the fridge." [only for Cowboy Bebop lovers]Favourite Quote:"Everything has a beginning and an end. Life is just a cycle of starts and stops. There are ends we don't desire, but they're inevitable, we have to face them. It's what being human is all about." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kimochitim 0 Report post Posted April 24, 2009 The only funny one I know without google:"And what's the real lesson? Don't leave things in the fridge." [only for Cowboy Bebop lovers]Favourite Quote:"Everything has a beginning and an end. Life is just a cycle of starts and stops. There are ends we don't desire, but they're inevitable, we have to face them. It's what being human is all about." You know what the sad thing is...nobody in JP knows about Cowboy Bebop. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Alex Cicala 0 Report post Posted April 24, 2009 Woah really. You have got too be kidding me. This is one of my all time favourites, it comes before Ergo Proxy, Elfen Lied, and Neon Genesis. I can't believe that Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
