Coping With Stress And Family Issues Dont Really Know

[AlternativeNick 0]

ive been away for a while, as my daughter was just born a few weeks ago. firstly, i just want to let everyone know that things are going great with her, aside from a bit of nerve damage in her right shoulder.

if you would like to see pics, theyre available here http://forums.xisto.com/no_longer_exists/

her name is Stevie Lin and was born July 14th at 10:36 PM

anyways, i was just looking for someone to talk to, the mother and I are still together, but she has some anger problems, and it makes it really hard for me to deal with it when she gets very frustrated, and i really dont have the option of talking to her about any of MY frustrations, and she always expects me to help her through her problems. I really feel as though im carrying around not only my worries, but all of hers as well, because she sort of pins them on me. anyways, over the past 2-3 weeks, ive been really losing sleep. ill go 2-3 days without sleeping, then crash for 18 or 20 hours because i really cant get any rest from her problems. Ive always been the type of person that can deal with alot and i like to think that im very patient, but seeing her get so frustrated makes it alot harder on myself. making things worse, i quit smoking about 5 months ago, and i get very strong cravings for cigarettes when i get frustrated, and its not very easy, seeing as how ill be 18 in about 2 weeks, and im not sure that ill be able to stay off them

im not really sure what im asking here, but just knowing that someone is there will definately help


anyways, for any of you who have any medical knowledge, the nerve problems shes having are called erbs palsy and shoulder dissocia (sp?) basically, from what i can tell, this is a 'bruise' on a nerve that runs from the neck to the arm under the right clavicle. This is actually quite common during birth, especially that of large babies ( my daughter was 9 lbs 4 oz ) and is caused by a stretching or twisting of the neck, which can cause the nerve to be pulled/stretched.

if anyone has any more information, i would really appreciate it, im reading everything i can on the subject, however a neurologist from the cleveland clinic said that within 3-4 months, everything should be functioning at a normal level ( thank god )

[Dagoth Nereviar 0]

ive been away for a while, as my daughter was just born....born July 14th at 10:36 PM

Congratulaitons Glad to hear the mother/baby is ok

anyways, i was just looking for someone to talk to.....stay off them

I'm not an expert on this stuff, but I'll try and help First of all, is she usually like this? or is it since/around the birth? Because it may just be hormones and what-not, and she'll eventually calm down

anyways, for any of you who....i can on the subject

I'm not, but Google is You might of tried it, but I got two links on the subject for you:
http://www.erbspalsygroup.co.uk/
http://www.aafp.org/afp/2004/0401/p1707.html

however a neurologist from the cleveland clinic said that within 3-4 months, everything should be functioning at a normal level ( thank god )

As a birth type thing, I thought it might, even though I know nothing of it ( ) but it's always good to hear from an expert


Hope you end up feeling better, and the mother calms down

[Chatz 0]

I had just truned 18 when my baby boy was born(1 and half years ago).Likely I have a beautiful fiance that always stood by me.In the beinging things were diffcult so I know how hard things are for you.I'm not talking just as a relationship shrink but also as some one that's gone through all that you going through now.It's not easy being a father in such a early age but you can make things easier.First of all you got to sit down with the mother of your child and TALK to her.I know it's not easy but you got to try and talk and solve your promblems,you two need to be as one,both on eachothers side.After that you two got to work the family promblem (if you have any) I sure did.Having your families support is the best cure for any promblems that might accor in the furture as also as present.

[Lunar 0]

I don't know much about this type of subject really but I happen to know some things. But hey, I'm just a kid so you might think this kind of advice is dumb. Sometimes after a mother gives birth, she kinda gets out of control. It's not her fault really, it could either because she is TOO excited with the new baby or she has had to deal with a lot of things during the baby's birth.Just have some time to talk to her in any way or form. Regardless of whether she's yelling at you during the conversation, you have to know what's going on. Tell her that your having a hard time understanding all her commands. Or rather tell her that you're a bit stressed from the work. She should understand to calm a bit down. I don't know for sure if this works. As for the baby the problem is a birth effect. Some have been know to gradually heal themselves of the problem. I hope your baby is one of them. :)Also good luck.

[jlhaslip 4]

hey, congrats on the healthy baby girl. I hope that nerve thing is only temporary and be thankful that both the Mom and the baby are well.Things in your life have changed and the Mom's reacting in this manner is not uncommon. Search for some assistance with this problem at your Local Public health Clinic or the Mom's Doctor would also be a good starting point to get some help. Realistically, you can not continue on the schedule you are currently on. Good Luck and keep us posted.

[AlternativeNick 0]

heh i know its been a while since ive posted in this thread (actually forgot where it was) but anyways, my daughter is doing much better, shes in phyiscal therapy 2 times a week, and she is making alot of progress.Thanks everyone for all your support

[brandice 0]

First off, congratulations. Your baby is beautiful.It's got to be tough, people mostly pay attention to the mother's feelings after a baby is born. there are also a lot adjustments the father has to go through. My niece went through the same thing. Nerve damage and a broken collarbone at birth. it was pretty severe. she had to have surgery and a lot of physical therapy but she's fine now. Like any other five-year-old. The only time you notice anything different is when she's running.good luck. keep up with the exercises at home.