Feeling Guilty...

[imacul8 0]

I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years now and during that time i have cheated on her twice with 2 different girls. Its not that i dont love her or enjoy what we have/do together. But i enjoy attractive womens company a lot and experiencing sexual relations with different people is just more exciting.Both times werent that good though... and i feel really guilty for doing it. Only one of them new i had a girlfriend and she didnt mind but when the other found out she wasnt to happy about it, plus i found out her sister knows my mates so that just made it worse...and the other day we went to get subway and she was in there, so i had to make an excuse and quickly leave before she saw me..hope my girlfriend never finds out cause i love her a lot a dont want to lose her. :\

[Avalon 1]

And well you should feel guilty. You say you love this girl, what sort of way is that to show your love? I'm sorry but I have no sympathy for you if you do lose her. I'm not normally this harsh, but this is one thing that annoys me. Actions speak louder than words, I think don't you love this girl as much as you say you do. If you did, it wouldn't be hard to resist other women. I have been married for 22 years and have never cheated on my wife, and as far as I know, she has never cheated on me.My advice to you, if you REALLY love her, tell her about the other girls and hope she loves you enough to give you another chance. If she finds out from somebody else, you are finished. Don't expect her to trust you for a long time to come though.

Edited May 21, 2006 by Avalon (see edit history)

[tuddy 0]

You really want to test your love for her? Then go and tell her about what you done, and i'm sure within 2 seconds of hearing the word 'Cheat' she'll be mad and crying. Now if you can work through it and still have a relationship at the end well, good for YOU! ...If she was here asking for advice, you could guess what everyone would be saying?, so i hope you learnt and believe that you'll always one way or another let it out. You'd be suprised what you say when your drunk. On a Happier Note: Your lucky you live so far away from me, cause if you lived within 2 hours, i'd for sure make the trip to make sure she finds out and you felt what it was like to have someone cheat on you. How the hell would you feel? All because you want Adventure for the lack of better terms.... God Can't Help You ...

Edited May 21, 2006 by tuddy (see edit history)

[imacul8 0]

wow i seem to get this sort of reply from just about everyone...Im not a bad person though and u all say i dont really love her but i do its just i am attracted to women and find it hard to resist them in that sorta situation... My gf knows about one of the girls but doesnt know what went on...... and i know i should tell her but i dont want her to hate me since all her friends and my friends all hang out.. will make things really awkward when we go out :\

[Avalon 1]

Well gee... you should have thought of that before. No pity from me.

Edited May 21, 2006 by Avalon (see edit history)

[tuddy 0]

Duh. Obvious answer here. Everyone wheather they male or female still have an attration to someone else regardless whether they are in love with someone else or not. BUT!, most people find that thier love is strong enough to resist the earge to chest on the person they love. Love is the bond btween two people that you know won't be shared with someone else. Which you are ... You don't love her, your afraid to lose her. She may provide a sense or thrill but whatever it is, it isnt fair on her.Seriously, i don't think you have thought your actions through and thought, 'Why would she be angry at me if she found out?' This may provide you with some insight that other people besides your self-centred self feel.She holds her love in you, and doesn't cheat on you, because she loves you, and isn't self centred, yourself through forget about her feelings and just remember yours being 'I'm attracted to that chick over there..' and break her feelings without caring for them. Even if she don't know, she'll only be hurt more when she finds out after the long time of period. You shouldn't be feeling guility, try more ASHAMED!!

[PmH 0]

Wow. I'd be worried if you didn't feel guilty!

You shouldn't be feeling guility, try more ASHAMED!!

very much so. I agree.

If you love your girlfriend so much then there should have been no need to cheat on her. Life is funny, good things take so long to make and they can so easily be destroyed by a stupid mistake. But in your case, that's two stupid mistakes. You really gotta wonder what you're thinking when you make the SECOND mistake.

What you don't know can't hurt you though, but I think your girlfriend deserves someone better. I hope she realizes that, but I don't want her heart to be broken. When she finds out, and when she's hurt by this, you have every right and reason to be ashamed, guilty, and whatever it is you feel.

[tuddy 0]

Remembering that the old quote 'What they don't know, can't hurt them' is also based around around trust. She believes she has trust in you now, when she finds out, she'll be in love but the trust will be gone, therefore your trust is out, your love is then only built on lust, and i doubt you'll even get that.You deserve what you get jumping into a snake pit full of snake mate.

[Togi 0]

My advice to you, if you REALLY love her, tell her about the other girls and hope she loves you enough to give you another chance. If she finds out from somebody else, you are finished. Don't expect her to trust you for a long time to come though.

There we go.. this is the advice to follow. You know she's gonna find out eventually, so you oughta be a man about it and tell her what's up, whether or not it'd make it 'awkward' when you're hanging out together with your friends.
Ah, what is the world coming to? ^^;;

[kassuberacing 0]

I have been with my girlfriend for 3 years now and during that time i have cheated on her twice with 2 different girls. Its not that i dont love her or enjoy what we have/do together. But i enjoy attractive womens company a lot and experiencing sexual relations with different people is just more exciting.
Both times werent that good though... and i feel really guilty for doing it. Only one of them new i had a girlfriend and she didnt mind but when the other found out she wasnt to happy about it, plus i found out her sister knows my mates so that just made it worse...

and the other day we went to get subway and she was in there, so i had to make an excuse and quickly leave before she saw me..

hope my girlfriend never finds out cause i love her a lot a dont want to lose her. :\

I understand where you're coming from. I have cheated on girlfriends in the past only to feel miserable about it in the aftermath. The best thing i can say to you is that, if there is a need or feeling to wanting to cheat or being enticed by someone of the opposite sex, while you have a gf/bf should be a clear answer as to your feelings of the person your dating. What i mean is when you find your soulmate or the person you are meant to be with, then other memebers of the opposite sex will not entrigue you or entice you anymore. Thats just my opinion and what has happened to me since I met my current gf and its the greatest feeling.

[AnGeL KiSS 0]

If you're feeling guilty don't do it anymore, if you still love your girlfriend instead of the other girls don't talk to the other girls anymore... if your girlfriend finds out, you ever think how she would feel? All the betrayal and trust she put it you? I been experiencing a breakup yesterday not because my boyfriend cheated on me... but if you still want to be with your girlfriend don't continue being with the other girls. I mean how would you feel if you find out your girlfriend cheating on YOU with two other boys? Well everyone knows its hard to stay with that someone all the time and your feelings ware off but when they ware off its the time you tell them... if you really want more company more than your girlfriend then I think you should tell your girlfriend before she gets hurt finding out.

[Joshua 0]

A lot of the answers already given, and I"m probably going to just echo them for the most part. First off... You DON'T love her. If you did you'd be committed to acting in her best interests and making HER happy rather then yourself. All you're interested in is gratifying your own lusts and pleasures, rather then taking care of her, loving her, protecting her, and helping her become the most fulfilled person she can become. If there really is any part of you that cares at all about who she is, you will do as everyone else has said, and be up front with her. She deserves to know the truth and lies and deceptions only make the end result a hundred times worse then it would've been otherwise. When the truth comes out (and it WILL, sooner or later, maybe not now, maybe not even in 10 years, maybe not even in this life, but I guarantee you it will) she will only hate you all the more, and she will not forgive. Jealousy is the rage of a person and she will not pardon or forgive. On the other hand, I'm guessing you're in the relationship with her for sex and she is sleeping with you as well, in which case it's pretty stupid of either of you to think the other will be loyal. Loyalty is something that comes with marriage, because otherwise, what tie is binding you together? If it was love, you'd have waited. The common conception of dating is that it is like marriage as far as the benefits of sex and its pleasures but without the restrictions of loyalty and commitment to the other person. This was never God's will so don't be surprised if you never find the true relationship He meant to be between a man and a woman that can be made only by waiting until marriage for sex, loyalty/caring about the other person more then one's self, complete honesty and sincerity, and love... as opposed to mere lust. If I'm right about the kind of relationship you're both in, it was doomed from the start. Until both of you truly learn to love and follow God's will for your lives and relationships, I see nothing but heartache in all your relationships as you continually seek the "right person" only to never find them simply because you are not right yourselves.No one who wants the kind of committed, loving relationship that holds true value will put up with your ways for you would only harm them as you have this girl and others as well.

Edited July 13, 2006 by Joshua (see edit history)

[DanJGillis1 0]

Dude, nobody likes to be cheated on, just come right out and tell her, trust is something you can never break or it will be even worse, like lets say i look at pornos lol... if i tell her she wont be that upset with me just cause i told her, if i dont tell her, and she finds out, she will be extremely mad and maybe even break up with me on the spot.But i mean ,, cheating on your girlfriend 2 times and having sex with 2 other people?? thats just down right wrong dude!Sit down with your girlfriend and tell her, then break up with her right away (unless shes stupid or w/e and will still go out with u) to save her life from being all bad cause of YOU!, and u might have an STD.. so dude,, i dont even like talkin to ppl like u.. but w/e just telling u .. break u with her now so she dont have to live with you , cause its nasty . Peace