Kim 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2005 Marriage is tradition, it's been going on for generations, it's just a part of a couple's life if they are to spend it together. And if you are religious, getting married is also important, I don't know the whole rulebook, but I do know what God says about premarital sex. 172104[/snapback] What does God say about premarital sex? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thablkpanda 0 Report post Posted August 28, 2005 Nani, Good thoughts, however I'll have to bring around the fact that so many others have, If anyone's concerned with our little high-school love relationships, and if Little bobby's cheating on you with suzy, then Marrige deletes those problems, in theory. When you pledge your life to someone, legally, you two parts, become a whole.And ElevenMil is very right also, God says premarital sex is a big No No. And if you call yourself 'Christian' or any other belief with this same basic faith system, then not being married, however still in a sexual relationship, would be against His wishes. My parents did NOT have the fancy artsy-fartsy wedding you speak of Nani, You remind me very much of my mother, because she was a highly down to earth person, that would've had that same view on marrige, and such, hadn't it been for my father. She wanted to be a 'free sprited individual, so to speak' and he wanted to find someone to swear his life to, and hold onto forever. They were married legally, in front of a Judge, no pretty gowns, and doves, and overexpensive crap like that. Just a ring, and a Judge, that Legally bound them as Man and Wife. I have the odd feeling that you will be alot like them ;)Christopher Merchant Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AbstracT 0 Report post Posted August 30, 2005 i think people rush into it or dont really know the other person as well as they thought which is why so many of them fail and all of those things like pre-nups, divorce and everything happen...if people treated marriage like the sacred union its supposed to be instead of something they use just so they can have sex or just to say they are, then people wouldn't be skeptical about the whole thing Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Static_Fury 0 Report post Posted August 30, 2005 If you can live together without the papers, then why not simply further prove you love to one another?.....the papers are not what ruin the marrege. its the fact that people more than ever do not want to put out the effort to make things work. Love is learned it takes work. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Avalon 1 Report post Posted September 2, 2005 I tend to agree with Nani Cheri's original post here. I have been happily married for 23 years, (a bit of a rarity these days) and it's NOT the marriage itself that is important, it's the relationship within the marriage.There is no reason why you couldn't be in a relationship with a person for 23 years without being married. It's more a culture thing, the culture of the country you are in will determine as to whether or not it is socially acceptable to be in a long term relationship, (with or without children), without being married.Marriage is like any other relationship, it takes time to nurture and grow to be successful. Don't rush into a commitment. In Australia, possibly like many other countries, I think once you have been in a relationship for more than 1 year, the legal rights of both parties are similar to being married. So in the eyes of the law, you are essentially married.What makes a marriage or any other long term relationship work you ask? Just 2 words: TRUST and RESPECT. If both partners can trust each other and respect each others needs and desires, the relationship has a very good chance of surviving.These 2 words apply to any relationship, including business relationships. If you cannot trust a business you deal with and they won't respect your needs, the relationship will not succeed, you will take your business elsewhere. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Saint_Michael 3 Report post Posted September 2, 2005 23 yrs avalon well and i thought you were a little younger hmm i guess i was wrong on that , but in the us thier is a 7 year rule that is the same as marriage, it goes after 7 years of the couple living together in the same location it practically marriage can't remember what the other stuff that goes with it but for me once i take that step i want the love to be their.my parents are on their 32 anniversary and they are still going at it ***wink wink***. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Avalon 1 Report post Posted September 2, 2005 Definitely do not make the commitment unless the love is there. Just be prepared to work at keeping the love there with trust and respect. Any long term relationship takes work to keep it going, it doesn't just happen magically like some many people seem to think.So your parents are still going at it? That's good, while sex is important in a relationship, (needs and desires) a relationship based solely on sex will not last. And yes, after 23 years we're still at it too. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Saint_Michael 3 Report post Posted September 2, 2005 that i did not need to know , lucky for me though sex is not a big factor for us (thank god for that) or me and the gf wouldn't be together this long.its my preferance and she understands that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Avalon 1 Report post Posted September 3, 2005 its my preferance and she understands that. 181591[/snapback] This is exactly what I mean by respect, your gf is respecting your preference. If you're doing similar things, respecting her wishes, then you're well on the way to a long, meaningful relationship. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Saint_Michael 3 Report post Posted September 3, 2005 oh i do you should see the conversations we have that i won't mention here due to the younger audience here. but yeah we talked about all aspects of us ex: marriage, children, where we would live (family location for relatives and all that good stuff).actually we spent like a total of 3 days talking about children names, how many all that stuff. which helps us both to get to know each other at a deeper level. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nani Cheri 0 Report post Posted September 13, 2005 oh i do you should see the conversations we have that i won't mention here due to the younger audience here. but yeah we talked about all aspects of us ex: marriage, children, where we would live (family location for relatives and all that good stuff). actually we spent like a total of 3 days talking about children names, how many all that stuff. which helps us both to get to know each other at a deeper level. 181845[/snapback] Am I missing something here?? Are you married mikeyyyy????? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
simply-me 0 Report post Posted September 16, 2005 Well i sorry but your on your own there marriage is big to me its like the way of showing that you belong here and your right IT IS EVERY GIRLS DREAMi am a girl and thats my dream Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kashvet 0 Report post Posted September 16, 2005 Hi!! They say it's every girls dream: MARRIAGE the guy of your desires!! Tha man on the white horse, etc etc.. Well, then I'm not normal, cause I think marriage is so not useful! You marry, and then you break up. And if you don't, you live unhappy. (I dont mean the people who founf there soulmates etc.) Why can't you just love eachother without all this stuff? Papers, papers, troubles, money, and if you have to give up the half of you fortune, you get a fight with your ex for free with the package. No thanks, I just thro some party with the same stuff, If I had to so necessarily have the whole thing, dress, birds, flowers, and the whole world looking at you. I'm able to love someone and to show that I want to spend my life with him, without all the marriage... Or is there something els I misses about why marriage is sooo great, and why it's good to show your partner you give him your all with asking him to marry you? 170509[/snapback] Yeah but what about kids......dont you want them and what about ur parents id this the way they lived............ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nani Cheri 0 Report post Posted September 20, 2005 Well i sorry but your on your own there marriage is big to me its like the way of showing that you belong here and your right IT IS EVERY GIRLS DREAM i am a girl and thats my dream 186544[/snapback] well I can show Im ? here ? (where on earth?) without marrying...i can show someone I love him without marrying...thats actually the reason why Im saying this. And...if Im right...why you wanna accent it by sayin IT IS EVERY GIRLS DREAM...Im a girl and thats my dream? sure girl nothing wrong with that...cant remember I sad it is... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nani Cheri 0 Report post Posted September 20, 2005 Yeah but what about kids......dont you want them and what about ur parents id this the way they lived............ 186573[/snapback] No, I dont necessarily want to make kids...I prefer adopting them...I mean who wanna put children on this earth thats almost selfish.. (okay not thru, if you want em you get em)..but I prefer adopting again... But even if I wanted children? Why does marrying has to be a guarentee that my husband stays with me, so my children will have their dad. Why cant people just love eachother without needing a guarentee..if you know where Im getting at... Al this trouble...If your serious with someone...an you truly love him...wanna make kids...you can live like husband and wife just like your married, but without the trouble right? Or common people...is it just about religion? Cause..then I'll understand the use of it. oneee Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
