Poem: Chronicals Of Anguish

[qingtian 0]

I wrote this poem last week, it's called 'Chronicals of Anguish'... it's about someone I know but anyway, dont have to pay much attention to the words, perhaps more to the structure? lol I dont know, but I hope you will like reading it... it's kind of long though, so sorry about that

 

Chronicals of Anguish

 

Snickering now, at promises you made,

The simple things that I longed to hear,

Regarded them as a sign that you cared,

Rendered as lies as they become clear.

 

Trust is shattered again and again,

Memories fade, except thoughts of you,

Strength less now, tired from frustration,

Exhausted from hurt that I try to subdue.

 

The support you once showed, now evanesced,

Hopes are now dimmed, will it ever restore?

Holding back tears, refuse to give in,

Refuse to show that you meant so much more.

 

Blinded by friendship, I thought could exist,

Your kindness towards me is only a shell,

I request that you try and walk in my shoes,

You?ll see this anguish, in which I now dwell.

 

I dropped independence, you held my faith,

This expectation that I had towards you,

Hoping that you would just help me once more,

Tired now of waiting, perhaps it is through.

 

Accompanied by, your gentle words,

False hope arises, I held it so high,

Realising now the unfortunate truth,

The concern that you showed just flew right by.

 

Now awkwardness stands, here between us,

A reluctant smile I carry across,

I ask only for effort, willingness from you,

But already my hopes have drowned to a loss.

 

Difficult to withstand, therefore I give up,

Perhaps it?s because I can?t bare to face you,

Like a leaf in the wind, you've blown away,

And soon will I, slowly turn my back too.

 

Persistence to forget you, yet again fails,

The prolonging of hurt I?m still comprehending,

Need not to forget, who I really am,

Still this part of my life now a bittersweet ending.

[Lunaray 0]

I like it, but the amount of angst is really quite high =X

[Shackman 0]

The poem on the overall is nice. I got a little confused by the first two paragraphs. Things started to sort out after the 3rd paragraph. I think your poem is a little long winded. You try to express the same feeling several times. But it could be your style of writing...i don't know. Anyway, good work.

[iGuest 3]

Lovely... That's all that needs be said. But I would point out that half of your poem does rhyme, while the other half does not. Was it supposed to be that way? You should post some more of your work, if it's anything like this one. I will enjoy the rest of it as well. Later, J. (TS)

[SilverBoarder 0]

Hey that would make great lyrics to a metal song lol u should try it

[katagirl3000 0]

This kind of reminds me of me. "I dropped independence, you held my faith, This expectation that I had towards you,Hoping that you would just help me once more,Tired now of waiting, perhaps it is through.Accompanied by, your gentle words,False hope arises, I held it so high,Realising now the unfortunate truth,The concern that you showed just flew right by."With my boyfriend my emotions and everything are all dependent on him. I mean if we ever argue or not speak i get so sad. My day could be perfect but he could make me extremely sad with just a few words The second paragraph reminds me of me because whenever I tried to leave the relationship he would use gentle words and then i would get a false hope that we can work out. Even though inside I really believe it couldn't, It's because I do love him a lot that his gentle words take an effect on me. Don't feel sorry, we're still trying to work on our problems. We do love each other a lot