My First Poem =p It probably stinks _;

[Lunaray 0]

Just for fun, let me post the first poem i have ever written. Keep in mind that english is not really my first language, so it kinda sucks >_<;

 

Memories

 

I remember a time so long ago

A time of whence we lived

Memories of joy, painted in gold

Innocence we would miss

 

I remember a time where war had raged

And swept into our lands

You vowed revenge for those who were slain

And those who fought in vain

 

I remember the place where you set sail

To journey to the enemies? land

You swore to return, never to fail

Under the dark you left no trail?

 

I remember the days of tension

As time seemed to fly

Many returned but you they saw not

Were those truth or lies?

 

I remember the pain I could not bear

Your loss I could not take

As time passed your image fades

?Till no more I could take

 

I remember the paths I searched

The battlefields you?ve fought

However winter had came and purged

All signs of strife on earth

 

I remember the stars, shining above

Our guide through lands unknown

When may the goddess reunite our love

And take us to places no wind has blown?

 

I remember the dragons, immortally old

With hoards of knowledge and gold

Your fate was lost, even to them

Lost in the dark, forever damned

 

I remember the sages, with wisdom untouched

Many I sought with hope in my heart

Their faces were drawn and sullen within

As they shook their heads, no answers to give

 

I remember the elves, the fairest of grace

In distant lands so far away

Sadly they sang, for love that was lost

Naught left but an iron cross

 

I remember the roads, empty and bleak

My journey is ending as they speak

My hope wears thin, I cannot fake

Your loss is still so hard to take?

 

I remember days of joy, all but gone

As life continues in its flight

Wait for me, for the day I pass on

And under the stars we will reunite?

[wassie 0]

well i think its pretty cool,just a big long for me.. but cool

[grrlfromoz 0]

oooh very nice *claps* love the imagery and story told. can't wait to read more

[Lunaray 0]

Too long? Yeah, i think. This should be my longest so far.

[DCreavers2 0]

Man that was long... but good

[qingtian 0]

Hey, yeah that one is pretty good for a first! Keep them coming

[dundun2007 0]

Are you sure its your first poem? because its pretty good! I know you heard this alot but it was long, though interesting so i read it all the way til the end. good job

[Lunaray 0]

Thanks =)

[katif 0]

I think it is a good poem :(It's long and written well. I like it very much

[nosoup4u 0]

I'm not really a "poem" kind of guy. I enjoy sports a lot more becasue they're fun and i dont get cramps in my hand (although i get them in many other parts of the body if you know what i mean) and i dont know how to write an effective poem. Here's one for all you homies out ther-\/ OUT

[sportzdawg 0]

Very elegant..but long for my taste. good job though