Fur Elise a poem I wrote a year ago for Lui

[Dotachin 0]

spaces
the size of your fingertips
leave the keys barren
of dust that lay there for a year.

again
play a lullaby to others
that to me is a song that needs no lyric...
echo out the twisted Fur Elise.

trip and fall on the broken F sharp.

your soul resounds
among walls that only knew love
from curtains.
Marry me.

chuckle and trip and fall.

my fingers
perform a duet with you on the floor.
each vibration heaves me,
bleeds to Ortigas the artery
and to it's sickled veins.

coffee and your voice over the phone.
your voice and the broken F sharp.

[Dotachin 0]

please feel free to rate or comment on it ^_____^ constructive criticisms are always welcome. it's free verse, btw. sorry, im no pro.

[nirvaman 1]

BRAVO ,

sorry, im no pro

, No dude you are doing just fine !I love it , and want to send it to a friend of mine *my girlfriend* if i will have your permission to change Elise name to my girl friend's name ?

[Dotachin 0]

np ^______^ go ahead.. please leave my name as the author though, if omitting it isn't necessary for the purpose..hehe thank you very much for the interest and the 'undeserved' compliments .

[reytic 0]

Nice poem! i likedcoffee and your voice over the phone.

[webishqiptar 0]

why is this poem called fur elise, I know this is a melody not a poem though nice style

[deadmad7 4]

BRAVO ,QUOTE sorry, im no pro , No dude you are doing just fine !I love it , and want to send it to a friend of mine *my girlfriend* if i will have your permission to change Elise name to my girl friend's name ?

Elise is not the name of the girl , its the name of the poem.

Anyways, nice poem, to me you are a pro!