Jump to content
xisto Community
Sign in to follow this  
mew1033

Weird! This is really real

Recommended Posts

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAthis is friekin hillarious. these are ACTUAL AND REAL things that were on church programs."The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals."The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon tonight:"Searching for Jesus."Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of thosethings not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to aconflict.Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," givingobvious pleasure to the congregation.Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for moretransfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes ofPastor Jack's sermons.The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir willsing: "Break Forth Into Joy."Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in thechurch. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition ofseveral new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled.Proceeds will be used to cripple children.Please place your donation in the envelope a long with the deceasedperson you want remembered.Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker and heave a healthy lunch.The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment andgracious hostility.Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation wouldlend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use theback door.The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Churchbasement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend thistragedy.Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.Please use large double door at the side entrance.well now u can go thank all those church ladies with typewritters!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

very funny i love those errors that some people make. today in school the teacher kept on going on about how "our souls go to heaven" which sounds like "a**eholes go to heaven" which at the time was very funny hahahaha me and my friend couldnt stop laughing :D :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yeah, those are great. I had something like taht forwarded to me on e-mail once. My favorite of all of the like that I have ever heard has got to be this one:"7:00 tonight. Join us for our weekly prayer meeting. A bean dinner will be provided, Music will follow."How on earth don't they catch any of these? :D I sometimes wonder if they plan these on purpose.... :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Guidelines | We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.