hertonsils 0 Report post Posted November 25, 2008 So I broke up with this girl about six months ago. We had only been together for a year but I have had far longer relationships than that before and none of them even compared to what I shared with this girl. I think it was the deepest love I have ever felt to be honest. Eventually we began fighting and had a couple of breaks until finally we broke up for good.I was totally devastated by this and had never been so low in my entire life... it took a long time to happen but slowly and surely I one by one picked up the tiny pieces of my life and got myself back together. I finally can function again which is fantastic. I don't sit there reminiscing or getting sentimental, I can go days without even giving the whole thing a thought and even when I finally do the thought leaves my mind as quickly as it entered.But the only problem is she still seems to pop up in my dreams. Sometimes it's reminiscing, sometimes it's dreaming about what we could have done in the future had things been different. Last night though was the worst one yet, I ran into her and we instantly acted bitter and spiteful to each other for what had happened and the hurt feelings we had both caused until eventually we had this moment where we realised we both, behind all that loved each other like crazy still and there was this moment of looking into each others eyes that instantly brought back a rush of all this emotion and for a second there I felt like it was really real.Then I woke up.Aargh I had the subconscious mind, during the day you can avoid thinking about stuff but your dreams you just can't control. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mbafactory 0 Report post Posted December 10, 2008 So I broke up with this girl about six months ago. We had only been together for a year but I have had far longer relationships than that before and none of them even compared to what I shared with this girl. I think it was the deepest love I have ever felt to be honest. Eventually we began fighting and had a couple of breaks until finally we broke up for good.I was totally devastated by this and had never been so low in my entire life... it took a long time to happen but slowly and surely I one by one picked up the tiny pieces of my life and got myself back together. I finally can function again which is fantastic. I don't sit there reminiscing or getting sentimental, I can go days without even giving the whole thing a thought and even when I finally do the thought leaves my mind as quickly as it entered.But the only problem is she still seems to pop up in my dreams. Sometimes it's reminiscing, sometimes it's dreaming about what we could have done in the future had things been different. Last night though was the worst one yet, I ran into her and we instantly acted bitter and spiteful to each other for what had happened and the hurt feelings we had both caused until eventually we had this moment where we realised we both, behind all that loved each other like crazy still and there was this moment of looking into each others eyes that instantly brought back a rush of all this emotion and for a second there I felt like it was really real.Then I woke up.Aargh I had the subconscious mind, during the day you can avoid thinking about stuff but your dreams you just can't control. Your problem is more of a psychological one than a real one. If you were in attachment with her so deeply you will face a challenge in taking over her memories. During day time you can involve yourself in other works and forget her for a while, but while you sleep your sub-conscious mind takes over and you dream about her.. Everyone of us goes through these ups and downs in life, but it is more important to get over.I would suggest you to indulge yourself in some of your hobbies, and if you are not having any develop one! Getting addicted to some recreative thing will definitely help you out replace her memories in your mind with that of new thing. Secondly you should start meditation. You will not see the immediate results but over 4-5 days you will start feeling the change and you will improve your psychological condition.Hope you get over her soon. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hakkera 0 Report post Posted December 11, 2008 Hmm, You seem to have a problem there bud, the only palatable advice I can offer is to have a think about anything that may trigger these dreams - I mean, the obvious answer is her in general, but think deeper than that. Maybe in your dream there is some point of focus that may not be clear, like... If you find her old hairbrush in your room it might start something in your head. Medatating is actually quite a difficult thing to do properly, so if you're up for that it maybe worth researching it a little, but it may help. But keeping busy is definately the way forward, maybe get a job, take up another hobby, spend more time with your friends, pretty much anything that isn't connected to her. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Variablez 0 Report post Posted December 12, 2008 Woah! Thats weird! You have got a problem there matey! What I suggest is you go to a sycotherapist (incorrect spelling but oh well!) and ask him or her to mend you with some hypnosis and drugs! Only joking! But seriously, get yourself checked out, there might be an easy solution Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ousk 0 Report post Posted January 3, 2009 Well i don't know how pertinent it's this advice cause i'm not a dream expert or how are those guys called, but i think that you dreaming about her is accidental, because she was a person that really influenced your life and your brain still has traces of her, or maybe you ask yourself to much what could have been if you guyz did not split up so the brain tries to give you some answers. Wrong answers that is why they're called dreams. Get out there and try to find another girl which hopefully will put your mind at ease. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites