Dealing With An Old Friend So I Can Write Stories We used to Cowrite, now I cant stand him

[NigaiAmaiYume 0]

I've got an interesting problem that's blocking me from writing some of my favorite stories.Six years ago, I became friends with a guy. At the time, we had a lot of the same interests, including writing. Bouncing ideas off of each other, we developed several stories, mostly through the process of him creating and writing for the male characters, me for the female ones (in other words, the gender we knew best.).He had a BIG crush on me, although I made it clear (eventually, when I figured it out) that I just wanted to stay friends with him.Unfortunately, we also started to grow apart. Honestly, the biggest problem was that I started to grow UP, while he seemed stuck in a place I was quickly becoming uncomfortable with (Depressed loner). It also quickly became apparent that I was his only friend, whereas I was starting to develop relationships with other people. And the more people I became friends with, the less I enjoyed spending time with him. This put a big strain on me, because eventually the only reasons I spent time with him was because I loved the stories we had developed, and I felt sorry for him.Finally, frustrated, I gave him an ultimatum: Grow up, get new relationships, or I was gone.I haven't talked to him in a year, and overall feel a better person for it.Unfortunately, I'd STILL like to write those stories. They're still knocking around in my head, and many of them have developed beyond what we had once done. Unfortunately, I don't feel right going ahead with them because he DID still have input, and they would not have happened without him.And when I feel cynical and don't care, I worry that I'll get them done and published, then he's sue me.What should I do? I don't want to start up a relationship with him again, and I don't know how else to talk to him without him assuming that. Besides, at the moment he holds the power, because he can just say he doesn't want to give up any claim to them without something from me in return.How can I write stories I love without getting screwed?

[serverph 0]

interesting. let's cut to the chase: how many of the stories you collaborated with him to develop do you intend to continue? but it's just a rhetorical question anyway, since your answer to that will not affect anyway what my reply will be as follows.

 

no matter how many of these stories may be, if you're worried about him staking claim to them in the future, just trash those stories altogether. OR drop out HIS inputs, and start afresh! i would think that in building a story, there would be scenarios which he contributed which you can throw away, wherein you can inject a different one. a creative person like you will not have so much problem creating those alternate scenarios which will eventually lead to the point you have developed without his contributions. it's like threshing out the pieces of his thoughts you don't want entangled with your own in your stories. they are better this way, IT WILL ALL BE YOURS.

 

otherwise, you may want to opt in re-establishing your relationship (as friends) with him briefly just to see if he has "grown up" since the last time you had contact with him. maybe in the year that passed, he has matured to your standards, and then you can resume your creative collaboration again. if not, then just simply take the opportunity to poach the idea of you resuming your work on your collaborations -- but now simply on your own. it will just worry you no end, if you just assumed he'd want future claims on those stories -- UNTIL you finally got a straight answer from him directly. who knows, he could have forgotten all about them already and these stories are not the least of his worries, much so reclaiming them, from when you last seen each other!

 

worst-case scenario? you share a byline with him for the stories you finished which you started with him! nothing much there but the royalties which would require you to deal with him ever again. and the royalties for the published work, you can always have the publisher deal with him!

 

at the end of the day, whatever you decide to do from the above suggestions, you will still have written the stories you loved! it's a win-win situation no matter how you look at it!

[NigaiAmaiYume 0]

Short answer: 2 stories I'm willing to drop, 1 story I want to keep, and 1 story I've changed but contains enough elements I'm worried about legalities.Long answer: I'd better start this with a frequent exchange between me and my new friends:Me: *explaining story* And here it gets a bit complicated...Them: It's a MARY story.Me: I mean complicated for ME.Them: *vaguely frightened* Can we get a flow chart?In short, this is touching on a TONNE of grey areas.The main story I'm worried about actually isn't ANYTHING we developed together. When playing around with an original character, I wondered what she'd do in a Spy setting - and suddenly, several other characters I loved but hadn't known what to do with snapped into place.The problem is, my FAVORITE, Bethany, has kinda insisted she's the daughter of two characters this guy and I made up, and I don't know how to change THEM enough to not get any concerns about legalities without screwing over HER, because part of her personality is her relationship with THEIR relationship. (Does any of that make sense? Should I explain it more?) [edit]Double trouble comes with the WHY of Bethany. In short, her mother was given an experimental drug as a child that was designed to develop psychic abilities (Or Potential as the new setting is calling it). The bad guys take her and overdose her in an attempt to maximize her Potential, which kinda screws up her DNA. The good guys get Bethany's mother back and cure her, but not before Bethany is conceived. The end result of this is that Bethany may not be 100% human as we understand it, especially since she seems to produce tiny amounts of the drug naturally in her own body. The Bethany stuff is actually from her very first incarnation, but the fact it matches so well with what had come out of my former friend and my's story with her mother makes me wonder just how much I can change and just how much I can keep.[edit]On top of that, by including Bethany, I suddenly find places for all the kids-of-this-group I made up when bored.I'm TRYING to figure out ways to rewrite the first generation, which would end up getting refered to in flashbacks and parallels with the main story, but I'm not sure exactly how much I'll have to change.And then there's the other story, which I absolutely LOVE, and just want to be able to write.Another problem (Which HAD come up during this relationship) is that I'm a MAJOR control freak. While I could DEVELOP things with other people, when it comes to the actual writing, I'm SUPER possesive.*groans* I wish I didn't like Bethany's story so much. It's not like I don't have FIFTEEN other things to do.... But I REALLY wanna do it! *laughs*

Edited September 10, 2006 by NigaiAmaiYume (see edit history)

[serverph 0]

you're one tough cookie, and one not cut out from the common cookie-cutter! if you are not getting a nosebleed with Bethany's predicament, then i am with yours! lolzbest thing before proceeding is to take the courage to ASK the tough question to that "old" co-writer of yours. don't delay the inevitable any longer, it will just consume you and will just stifle your creative juices from running freely. then from his reaction, positive or negative, you can settle with finality what you'd do next: retain the original storyline, or rewrite the first generation of Bethany's character. since bethany is such a central figure in your story, and you are so passionate about her, i can only wish your "old" co-writer is not so obstinate as to impede your chances of finishing her story. :)and don't worry about being a major control freak and super-possessive about your writings. all writers are! they are your "babies" and being a "mother" to those works, it's just natural to be such. :Pnow, clear up your schedule and meet the guy for "closure"! a shoe ad says it best: JUST DO IT!

[Saint_Michael 3]

Or if you don't want to go through all that mess just do it the expensive way with lawyers and contracts and percentages of the profits from the books.Although that comes later.so try to establish a professional and business like relationship and EMPHASIZE that it 100% plutonic and not sexual if he can't except that then do the lawyer thing just to get partial rights to the character.Or if you want to be twisted get him drunk and tell him to sign this piece of paper and make something up as to why he has to sign it.(I do not recommend that )

[NigaiAmaiYume 0]

Update: I did a quick write up for Bethany and some of the other characters for her story here.

And believe it or not, it DOES qualify as a "quick" write up. ^-^

[richierich1m 0]

just make some deal with your friend now give him some bucks and tell him to forget his rights get this written because it would be costly later if you want to publish it in a bookor simply change the names ,i don't think he would be able to claim thenbest of luck for your story.who knows someday you'll be j.k. rowling