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Question about girls


Thorned Rose

Unfortunately JasperIk, that is where you are wrong. You'd be surprised about what women talk about amongst themselves. Women are very open about their sex lives and often bounce ideas, thoughts, feelings, experiences etc off each other for reassurance and comradery. Men on the other hand tend to boast about their expoits but not share details or the emotional aspects of a sexual relationship/experience. As I said, women who are promiscuous are labbelled as sluts because it has long been held that it is not 'becoming' for a woman to have sex with anyone other than her husband. Unfortunately this aspect of society still remains if in a more subtle way.People often consider me a prude because I believe you should only have sex with someone you love and are committed to that does not mean I am against sex altogether or don't like talking about it - quite the opposite. I don't want my daughter and son growing up thinking sex is dirty or something to be ashamed of so I also believe in being open in talking about sex (age appropriate of course) and I don't believe women who have strong sexual drive are sluts. My libido has been at times, stronger than my husbands. That doesn't make me a **** but society as a whole could label me that way. It's not because of prude sorry - it's because of men.


JasperIk

Unfortunately JasperIk, that is where you are wrong. You'd be surprised about what women talk about amongst themselves. Women are very open about their sex lives and often bounce ideas, thoughts, feelings, experiences etc off each other for reassurance and comradery. Men on the other hand tend to boast about their expoits but not share details or the emotional aspects of a sexual relationship/experience. As I said, women who are promiscuous are labbelled as sluts because it has long been held that it is not 'becoming' for a woman to have sex with anyone other than her husband. Unfortunately this aspect of society still remains if in a more subtle way.People often consider me a prude because I believe you should only have sex with someone you love and are committed to that does not mean I am against sex altogether or don't like talking about it - quite the opposite. I don't want my daughter and son growing up thinking sex is dirty or something to be ashamed of so I also believe in being open in talking about sex (age appropriate of course) and I don't believe women who have strong sexual drive are sluts. My libido has been at times, stronger than my husbands. That doesn't make me a **** but society as a whole could label me that way. It's not because of prude sorry - it's because of men.


And yet, you are wrong. I have had a lot of females in my life, and yeah they talk about sex- but most women wouldn't. Women won't openly talk about sex, especially in front of men, because they don't want to spoil their holier than thou image. If you talk about sex amongst yourselves, it doesn't mean anything, because you already keep all your stuff between eachother, so how is sex any different? Yeah we talk about sex with eachother, and yeah we often boast...but atleast we allow ourselves that right, women don't. If you all would just talk about it like men, eventually people wouldn't care its the fact that you don't talk about it as openly, that causes people to judge those who do it. You have really brought it upon yourself. The only time i think a girl is a s ut is if they sleep around , while with someone already, and for men i think the same. Women are constantly not opening up to men, and so men are really forced to judge women, who do because they are always told its not how women are, by WOMEN. I've talked to girls, who are all about sex, and then a straight guy comes along and they shut up, but really a lot of men don't mind hearing what girls have to say about sex, but oh no, must no ruin the image! Its because of women, that people call women who have sex with more than one person s uts, not men.

gaea

JasperIk: I've been around girls talking about sex, masturbation and the like. It's really not rare; especially if there is a large group of them.Anyways, I'd deffinatly agree that reglion is one of the sources of that stupid double-standard. You could also look at it from an evolutional standpoint: A woman carries her baby for a peroid of 9 months. Because of the time and energy invested, it behooves her to find a good mate. Men, on the other-hand, can impregnate many women within a short ammount of time; which alows them to spread their genes more quickly.


Thorned Rose

And yet, you are wrong. I have had a lot of females in my life, and yeah they talk about sex- but most women wouldn't. Women won't openly talk about sex, especially in front of men, because they don't want to spoil their holier than thou image. If you talk about sex amongst yourselves, it doesn't mean anything, because you already keep all your stuff between eachother, so how is sex any different? Yeah we talk about sex with eachother, and yeah we often boast...but atleast we allow ourselves that right, women don't. If you all would just talk about it like men, eventually people wouldn't care its the fact that you don't talk about it as openly, that causes people to judge those who do it. You have really brought it upon yourself. The only time i think a girl is a s ut is if they sleep around , while with someone already, and for men i think the same. Women are constantly not opening up to men, and so men are really forced to judge women, who do because they are always told its not how women are, by WOMEN. I've talked to girls, who are all about sex, and then a straight guy comes along and they shut up, but really a lot of men don't mind hearing what girls have to say about sex, but oh no, must no ruin the image! Its because of women, that people call women who have sex with more than one person s uts, not men.


Dude, I AM a girl. I think I know what I'm talking about not to mention psychology is a hobby of mine. Women won't talk about sex to and around men for the most part because men talk about sex in a different way, as I said mostly to boast whereas women talk about sex to get reassurance from friends ("Is it normal to...") and for emotional guidance and comradery. Most men cannot provide that. I cannot go to my husband and say how does doing this feel to you if I am looking for reassurance because he has a penis and has a less emotional response to sex than a woman thus his experience will be very different. That's not to say men only have sex for physical reasons of course, they just have less of an emotional response than women to the experience. Not to mention, most women find it off putting when men talk about their sexual exploits as though having sex with a woman is conquering something. Women find it insulting and for the most part cannot relate to it. Why would you open up to someone that you can't relate to and won't understand you? Talk about sex like men?! As I said, women are not motivated by the same reasons as men so we cannot talk about it like men. I believe in equality and feminists pi** me off just as much as some sexist pig but I also realise that men and women are different. Women are far more open than men are. That's not opinion but fact. It's the way men and womens' brains differ - mens' brains have less connection between emotion and communication so they have more trouble communicating their feelings. Women are constantly trying to open up to men and get the same response but as men cannot communicate feelings well they usually don't notice and can't really reciprocate.
The majority of women don't want to boast. It's not our main motivation so it is ridiculous to say that women should boast about sex like men do. And I don't think that boasting is a right. No offense but what a ridiculous thing to say. It's a sure and fast way to put a chick off. Expressing you opinions is a right but boasting about how many people you've had sex with or how you knocked someone up, sideways and down to next Tuesday isn't some sort of God given right. It's people trying to elevate themselves in someone elses eyes through a fairly crude and blunt way.
Once upon a time, womens' sexuality was quite literally worshipped. Women were viewed as being something very special because they brought new life into the world however with the advent of male led religion (mostly christianity and Catholism) this idea was quashed. Women were ony allowed to have sex with their husbands and they were told to just essentially lie there and take it because they had to service their husbands whenever he wanted. Because of original sin, child birth became a punishment for women instead of something miraculous. Unfortunately this became so ingrained, women passed these ideas down to their daughters. I had these sorts of lectures from my Grandmother (a Catholic) - it's not becoming for women to blahdey blahdey blah... This is an idea that is still buried within society. So many cultures have and still belittle women while encouraging men to be sexually proud and expoitive (the Karma Sutra for example tells men it is ok to have an affair so long as they don't get caught but not ok for women). Women may be spreading these ideas but only because these ideas were put upon them by the generation before whereas some men are still actively encouraging these ideas. I consciously think that sex is fine and not dirty, yet my subconscious (influenced by what I was taught a young girl) says that it's dirty and disgusting. How is that fair? So unfortunately men have been the biggest culprits. As for a holier than thou image - women like to feel special and be 'worshipped'. Probably an evolutionary thing too. If our partners are making us feel special and like we are the only ones they want to be with, we can ensure that the only offspring they are creating is with us and they aren't spreading their seed on the side.

Jimmy

WOW! Just managed to get through that without falling off my chair ;D its 2:07 AM (edit: now 2:17!!!) ( late night justified by the holidays ) and that was an immense piece of writing. I completely agree with what you had to say. This has to be the best and most interesting thread so far I have read... Plus-I think its disgusting if people don't even have time to wash their hands, letalone anything else after doing anything. Fair enough that everyone will have to curb their feelings at some stage and quite right so. I don't know of anyone who wouldn't want to be "clean" whether after sex or just showering every day or so. Some things can astound you every day... Some things can just show you how wrong we all can be if we just see things from one viewpoint. night all - I must rest before this uncomfortable seat bores a hole into me.


Thorned Rose

Ummm... ok. While I have nothing against that I'm not sure that it's something everyone really need to know... At least more than I want to know


conret

there is a reason girls say that:1) Bad reputation for being a easy girl2) I don't know about you but the idea of a girl who never done it is attracting.3) When a man does it they are being a guy but when a girl does it they are being a ...4) Why would a girl admit they; have nothing to gain and everything to loose.


Thorned Rose

Eh? conret, are you saying that girls are sluts if they masturbate or they aren't?


JasperIk

there is a reason girls say that:1) Bad reputation for being a easy girl
2) I don't know about you but the idea of a girl who never done it is attracting.
3) When a man does it they are being a guy but when a girl does it they are being a ...
4) Why would a girl admit they; have nothing to gain and everything to loose.


I don't really get this post, if a girl admits to masturbating, the only reason why i would make a face to it, is because i am gay, and i dont care what a girl does. But if a girl masturbates, i dont really think its wrong... i mean, if guys do it, why can't girls?

BooZker

Haha this is a odd post. I think women who masturbate wash there hands more because well... nvm haha ANYWAYS Actually some men and women don't because of religious reasons. Other then those people most everyone does at least once. I don't see whats so wrong about it anyways.


iwuvcookies

They do masturbate. No doubt about it. i'm at a forum and they're open about that stuff. its just normal I guess. I guess its might be more acceptible for a guy to do it. But girsl do do it too. Lol. it sound sort of weird in a way but it happens.I hope they wash their hands. haha.


crapoartworks

I am sure many people do wash their hands.....


Thorned Rose

And many, many people do not.

 

Please, please people wash your hands after sticking your hands on and in any orafices (that includes mouths, noses, ears, genitals and your behind)!!


anjin

I find girls that masturbate a turn on.


Thorned Rose

I find girls that masturbate a turn on.

Good for you. I think many men do. As I am a girl, I do not. But then I don't find men masturbating particularly appealing either

Cerebral Stasis

Unless I'm mistaken, men usually consider sex to be primarily a physical thing (even if there are emotional strings attached), while with girls, it can either be a physical thing, an emotional thing, or combination of the two. For girls who do not find masturbation to be pleasant, it's probably more of an emotional thing (although I do not claim to be an expert).


Goth_Punk

I say every singal pearson does it! I mean its nothing 2 b ashamed of!


stephanie

i'm sure lots of girls lie about it but not all of them. and why should we? it's a normal thing to do and if guys do it and you accept that as an normal behaviour then why should we lie? it's as good for us as it is for you and does the exact same effect. but you are rigth,girls should be more relaxed and don't lie as much about it.


Cerebral Stasis

For men, it's a lot more about relieving hormonal pressure than actual pleasure (in my case, anyway). And then there are some benefits, such as decreased prostate cancer risk (or so some studies have suggested). For women, though, I'm not sure if there is any benefit, and for them it may be purely for pleasure.


gaea

I find girls that masturbate a turn on.

it's as good for us as it is for you and does the exact same effect. but you are rigth,girls should be more relaxed and don't lie as much about it.


In my experience, girls who masterbate tend to be more comfortable with their bodies than those who don't. This is especially visable when you're making love to a woman. Those who know how to pleasure themselves are much more aware of what they are looking to get out of the intimate contact--and so can better communicate it to you. As a result, the sex is better for both people (can't speak for other guys, but I won't really enjoy the sex unless my partner is having a wonderful time as well).

I'd even go as far to say that one of the main reasons some girls can't reach orgasam is that they arn't comfortable enough with their own bodies, and so can't relax into it (feeling of stress, or guilt are major mood killers).


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