Governmentium New Element

[nakulgupta 0]

A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest chemical element yet known to science. The new element has been named Governmentium. Governmentium has 1 electron, 25 neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 100 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 201. These 201 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since governmentium has no protons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 4 years but it does not decay, instead it undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant deputy neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, governmentium mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical transformation could lead to its isodope called pandemonium. You will know it when you see it.

[mitchellmckain 0]

You know with out any protons in the mix the electron doesn't make much sense. I mean how can their be any attraction to the electron if there is nothing positive in the govermentium at all. There seems to be plenty of charm and strangeness, but I dont's see why that would hold an electron.It makes me wonder if it really is an electron at all, maybe we deluding ourselves. If it doesn't obey basic rules that electrons are supposed to follow, then something else is going on. I suspect tampering with the results.Have you noticed how the governing principles (if they have principles) of the most populated states seem to be in the same atomic family, there has to be a correlation between this and the bizzare behavior of the electron.

[infamousflame 0]

You know with out any protons in the mix the electron doesn't make much sense. 

 

I mean how can their be any attraction to the electron if there is nothing positive in the govermentium at all. 

 

There seems to be plenty of charm and strangeness, but I dont's see why that would hold an electron.

 

It makes me wonder if it really is an electron at all, maybe we deluding ourselves. 

 

If it doesn't obey basic rules that electrons are supposed to follow, then something else is going on.  I suspect tampering with the results.

 

Have you noticed how the governing principles (if they have principles) of the most populated states seem to be in the same atomic family, there has to be a correlation between this and the bizzare behavior of the electron.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Is it just me, or is this a serious reply to a joke?