hateheals 0 Report post Posted July 30, 2007 We use this vent so gracefully without even thinking how it feels,but happily,this thingy cant feel so its kinda alright.Ever been in a situation where the person in front of you is clearly using you as a vent for his frustrations?The weird part being that you can retaliate,but something inside of you sort of prevents it.You now that you can fight back and shatter the whole purpose why the person approached you n the first place,your insides are screaming for payback,but nevertheless,you keep quiet.what would you do in such situations? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TikiPrincess 0 Report post Posted July 30, 2007 I know what you mean. Sometimes my husband comes home from work and nothing I do is right. When I ask him how work was, he just says nothing or, "Just a bad day." In my better moments, I try to remember how mean I can be when I'm tired and frustrated and menstral. But I'm only human and sometimes he knows what buttons to push to get me mad, and then he pushes them and pushes them. Sometimes I call him on it if I'm not in the mood to deal with being a verbal punching bag, but most of the time, I realize that he's frustrated and I try to figure out a way for him to relax. Usually that means putting on a DVD or playing some sort of video game where he can take it out on a virtual enemy rather than letting him try to pick a fight with me. Just try to remember that we're all humans and imperfect. We are weak and sometimes try to make other people feel as bad as we feel, but you don't have to take the abuse. Try to look for ways to deflect the anger from you and onto something else. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
salamangkero 0 Report post Posted July 31, 2007 There was a book, with a very long title: "A Devastatingly Brilliant Expos? of Almost Everything" Arthur Mullins was a beta male who worked for the government as a maintenance personnel. He was so low-profile people felt that their secrets will be safe with him. Ever and anon, they'd vent to him the pressure they feel in doing their job, like raising unemployment or keeping "dirty, dangerous money" in their bank accounts, for the safety of the taxpayers. Hell, they even moan to him about their fake Rembrandts or the affair their wives (or they themselves) had been having. All through it, Mullins listened patiently, soothing their egos and applying healing salves upon their wounded pride. They would go to work the next day, feeling a whole lot better now that they have vented their frustrations upon someone they could trust. Well, I can't spoil it for you but suffice to say that Mullins had on hand a lot of information that could put him in a position of utmost power. Not necessarily as a Prime Minister or, heaven forbid, the Queen (God, help the Queen ) but as something higher than that. He could have used the information to threaten or blackmail just about anyone in power in that blessed country. In any case, my point is that when people rant and vent, they usually end up saying something they don't really mean. Now, it may or may not be immediately useful but it's something that should not be shrugged off so easily. Other clich?s include: Patience is a virtue. Good things come to those who wait. God, please give me patience... right now. And, probably, the best one that entered my mind, a quote from Cinderella's stepmother: "Girls, girls... above all, self-control..." *knock on door* "WHAT?!?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eka_ys 0 Report post Posted July 31, 2007 I think the best thing that you can do is try to control yourself and try not to get into a fight. Sometimes people are stressed out and need to flush their emotion on something or someone (usually their closest person like spouse). If he's a man, then usually he needs to be by himself for a moment and if she's a woman then you can lend her an ear. You can't control others but you surely can control yourself and influence others by your words & actions. If you can't handle it then try to find some place where he/she's not around and try to relax yourself first. Because if 2 person who can't control themselves confront each other, they can say/do something that they'll both regret later.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites