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hateheals

How To Move On With Crushes? i take my name IS kinda suggestive,but it helps to a VERY limited ext

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Been liking a female for quiet a long time..told her about it in the most sucky manner possible:(!!!!...stilll am friends with her.....but the thing aint going anywhere because circumstances are absolutely beyond my control and some of em taking new and unexpected twists.....theres nothing more left to be done here but move on...which is kinda difficult because the feelings known as "infatuation" and "love " continues to linger preventing any reasonable decesions from being made....so basically im stuck in a trap...which one half of me wants to be in..and another half to be free....kinda a raging battle inside of my head and the side that says stay determined is kinda winning...but i feel i need to keep my options open....."get a new girl" or "forget about her" have been tried and tested......all of which have failed.....i have been called "desperate" ,"leech"and all kinda sticky adjectives by friends which has failed to deter me in my goal cause im still determined.....but i feel that in a highly unprobable case of movin on,i need to know what needs to be done....suggestions most welcome

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Live with it. How do you move on? You simple move on. Depends what you have to do, find another crush, get heavy into sports/hobby/whatever you do to keep your mind off it. While some people would say there is no simple way, the concept is fairly simple overall. You'll move on and live on, and you'll probably feel silly if you make to big of a deal. Just relax and do whatever you do. Go out and have fun - everyone is there own independant person, so you shouldn't need someone else. Reality sucks though. I'll give ya that.

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The fact that you haven't gotten together with her yet will make things easier for you, that is, you won't be proned to a break-up. Being rejected in the manner of asking out isn't as harsh as being rejected after being together for a while. It's easier to move on if you're not accepted when asking out. However, this little bit requires an explanation:

..told her about it in the most sucky manner possible:(!!!!...stilll am friends with her

What i get from the first part of it is that either you didn't ask her in a gentlemen-like manner or you were too shy and maybe even stuttered a lot which caused some failure. But the second half of that part makes me think it's more of the former.
If your friends telling you to do stuff doesn't affect you, how much less our advice. However, since you've decided to post about this, this appears to be your first step at reasonable thinking. For now, i'd advise you to start looking at how things are currently. You've already began doing so, but you should examine things more and use that examination to try and predict the future. See what you can shape, but most importantly what you can't modify. Consider that you're still friends with her. Consider your age and take a look at just how much longer you have to live in order to see that there's is plenty of time for many things to happen. Success brings fame.

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1)i am 18....NOT 44 as my profile suggests :D2)tis has been round about 2 years now3)she responded well..in a surprisingly calm for the manner in which i asker er.....said thats all fine.....saw that coming..and we can be friends and all.....things never really changed after that....were more or less the same..4)Im afraid that i'll have to keep a secret.....gives me the shivers just thinking about it..

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1)i am 18....NOT 44 as my profile suggests :D2)tis has been round about 2 years now
3)she responded well..in a surprisingly calm for the manner in which i asker er.....said thats all fine.....saw that coming..and we can be friends and all.....things never really changed after that....were more or less the same..
4)Im afraid that i'll have to keep a secret.....gives me the shivers just thinking about it..

dude you're only 18, since you're that young i'd say move on.
if she doesn't want to be with you there's no use in waiting you're young.
don't be tied down if you don't have to.
i mean seriously don't wait for her cause you don't know if she's worth it.
but then again there's no harm in dating other people if she is too.
maybe you'll find someone who is better and actually wants to be with you.
i say just move on.
don't think about it too much just find someone new.

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No point waiting around, you're only going to stop someone "who likes you" from getting with you, who you may end up liking more then this girl anyway. It's a simple concept, but not an simple one to get past. In having said that, you mention that you told her in the most "sucky" way possible, promblem number 1.Resolution: You have to give it more thought, more reseach. Wonder why your friends think what they do? Have you asked them weather they know more then you do? Has she said she'd "never" go out with you. I think you still have the determianation because you know the first time wasn't good enough and you think that's why she said no. I think you want to try a second time, and I'd encourage to do so, but tred lightly.You have to know that she may not like you at all in that way, she may like you, but has some doubts in her mind, she may like you and be shy etc. etc. You need to read her body lauguage and you need to know how to make her happy, and also what makes her smile when she feels down, that is what us guys do!Then simply take her out somewhere and treat her to a good time, fun activities like a fair, or carnival even go karting then dinner maybe somewhere, and just say you have to tell her how you feel, and that you understand if she doesn't feel the same way but you believe you'd make the relationshiop work for such and such a reason and then await her response, IF she doesn't like you, then you need to say that you're ok with that and can we still be friends. Then you need to "FULLY" move on, otherwise you will hurt her and your friendship!

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the situation is kinda wierd here..REAL wierd....the body language and related stuff REFUSE to speak...but at times...the feeling that something IS possible is kinda seen....it kinda is hard to put in text....i DID do all the abovementioned stuff.....no positive results till date except close friendship.....ALRIGHT-i initally asked her" d ye wanna hear a sucky joke??" then..."the words came out!!!!!!

Edited by hateheals (see edit history)

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the situation is kinda wierd here..REAL wierd....the body language and related stuff REFUSE to speak...but at times...the feeling that something IS possible is kinda seen....it kinda is hard to put in text....i DID do all the abovementioned stuff.....no positive results till date except close friendship.....
ALRIGHT-i initally asked her" d ye wanna hear a sucky joke??" then..."the words came out!!!!!!

let me get this straight you said do you want to hear a sucky joke and then you told her you liked her??
wow. i could see why things are akward between you two. honestly i say just put her out of sight out of mind.
you or any normal human being can be friends with a girl who they love, i mean honestly how is that possible?? you'll always want something more from the relationship and you'll always suffer because she most likely won't want the same thing as you. That's why i say get her out of your life and find someone new.
honestly.

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