When Politics And Religion Mix With Love What to do when this happens?

[Galahad 0]

OK, I'm facing this problem right now...I've been together with my present girlfriend, for little over 8 months now... I've known her for 3 or more years... We were very very good friends... Then love just happened to us... We are doing great... But few days ago, this religious/political problem arose... And no, not between her and me, but her mother and her... Things are pretty much messed up in my country, where we have two major political opinions, which would take too long to discuss, and it's place is not here... Enough to say, that I have a pro-european oppinion, whereas, both her mother and she, have somewhat negative oppinion on Europe (her mother more than her), and the rest of the world... Also, two of them are religious, Orthodox Christians, whereas I am an atheist...And here's the story...Her mother met me at the start of our relationship, and had nothing against me... She knew from the start, that I'm an atheist, and of completely different political oppinion than they are... None the less, she claimed that she liked me, and that I'm good for her daughter... My girlfriend and I, never had any fights, related to politics, or religion... Hell, we had maybe 2 fights during 8 months we've been together, and both of them were mild (we fight in the evening, and we make up in the morning, no big deal)But, things started to get mixed up... Her mother is blind, and two of them live alone, and that's what makes this matter complicated... Two of them have been alone almost all their life, and they have a special bond... I understand that her mother depends on her, but I think she is trying to destroy her life on purpose, so she would spend her whole life with her... Because, I learned this is not the first time she does this, when her relationships get a bit serious... However, this threatens to be the biggest fight they had up to date...They live in Belgrade, I live in Novi Sad, it's 80km distance, not far, right? But when it comes to political, and religional standpoints, couldn't be further away... I'm in a province called Vojvodina, which has 7 official languages, and a dosen ethnical communities... Hungarians, Romanians, Russians, Germans, and a dosen more, live mostly in Vojvodina... Also, many religional confessions exist here... She is in a state capital, which is kind of xenofobical, with the rest of the country... So, she never had someone completely different from her...And now, she is trying to separate us... And by that, I mean EVERYTHING... She even pretends to be sick, after a fight the two of them had... My girlfriend doesn't want to break up with me, we truly are in love, and I believe this could be IT... But if her mother continues to do this, I don't know what will happen... She could actually pressure her to break up with me, pretending to be sick all the time...In these 8 months, we've always seen each other for weekends, if I go to her house, or she comes to mine... So, two days a week we're together, and 5 days a week, they're together... And she started claiming my girlfriend is neglecting her because of me, that she never thinks about her, etc. Which is not true, because even when she is with me, she often speaks of her, and she calls her often, to see if everything is all right... And in 8 months, she never said anything about being neglected... Why now? Why after 8 months, do all this?There is probbably a ton of things I failed to mention here, but I'm really not my self, I'm worried about what will happen... I'm very emotional, and when I love, I love with all my heart... And I love this girl with all my heart, and even more... So, I hope you understand why thid worries me like hell... Maybe I'm over reacting, maybe this is normal, but it never happened to me... If she had some good reason that two of us shouldn't be together, I would accepted that... I never rose my hand to hit her, I never even raised my voice at her... I do everything just to make her happy, and to se her smile, and be sattisfied... I guess you can't call a person like that "bad for her", can you? I don't know... I guess, the person most competent to say, whether I'm a good boyfriend, is my girlfriend, but as she is not here, I'll have to defend my self... I suppose, if I were a bad boyfriend, she wouldn't have stayed with me for 8 months... Would she?I guess I'm asking for your oppinion on this... Or maybe comfort... Who knows... Do any of you have any idea what should I do?

[Saint_Michael 3]

Believe your not the only whos relationships go sour. The jist is that it's not politics/religion it's the seperation that the mother feels every time her daughter is gone.Also being that they were both alone for so long and that her mother is blind the mother can't trust anyone else except her daughter as well to take care of her as such.Instead of fighting with her mother what I suggest that you build that trust between the three of you that you will not only take care her daughter but be able to support the mother as well.Trust is the issue and you have to build that up and make the mother feel comfortable.But unless the mother is doing this on purpose then she is just a control freak. But hopefully what i mentioned above is true then just try to follow at least some of it to get the trust going.

[Galahad 0]

Thanks Michael... Here comes newest info...Her mother, demanded she makes a choice... Her, or me... When she picked me, and packed her bags to come, after she left her apartment, after she took three steps, her mother faints, and hits her head on the doorstep...Also, she said she hates me, because I tried to separate them, and to exclude her from our life... Needless to say, I never even thought about it, even less tried...I don't know how this will go, but it's going to be tough... She forbids her to come to Novi Sad, and my birthday is coming up... Needless to say, it's going to be the crappiest birthday ever... We even planned to have a birthday party together, as her birthday is 5 days before mine...What will be of all this, I can no longer say... It just hurts as hell... My girlfriend said she won't give up on me, no matter what, and that she will lie to her mother, if she has to, that we broke up...Anyway, my best friend is on his way, with beer, lots of it, so I'm going to drown my sorrow in alcohol... Guess there's first time for everything, huh?Thanks for the advice St. Michael, but I believe, here, the case is her mother is a control freak... A bad case of one...I guess I'll keep writing here, since it makes all this a bit easier... I hope it's not spam... If it is, just say so... Maybe it's tiome I start writing my blog...Thanks for listening, oops, reading me, Xisto... Goodnight to all...

[-[Nero]- 0]

Politics and religion mix with love is pretty serious in my country (Islamic country). Back at high school, I was in love with a muslim girl. She was kind and pretty and sort of thing. She's not very loyal to Islam teaching to be honest, she is more like a modern city girl and a free thinker. She helped me a lot, and I truly loved her. We had a relation back at high school and things were going well. Unfortunately, our relation was short-term, mainly due to our different religion and race. In my country, whenever a person is in a relationship with a muslim, he or she must convert to Islam by our country's law. This certainly the convertion of one person to Islam isn't part of the Islamic law or in the teaching of al-Quran. I'm very certain because the 'genuine' al-Quran does not reject human rights. But my country implemented such laws. I wanted to reconsidered our relationship with her. I planned that we should start a new relationsip and marry her in overseas. However, I couldnt find her. She changed her contact number and that really saddened me. The only way I can contact her is through Msn messenger, she hasnt change that yet. But she seldom go online.It seriously hurts me back then. But i relised that maybe i wasnt meant to be in a relationship with her.