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My Stupid Friend And Her ...mess Up...of A Boyfriend! A rant to vent my anger

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Hi everyone!

 

This is just going to be one big rant cos i am so angry and i have to get it out or ill explode!

 

One of my best friends (who i also happen to have feelings for) has a boyfriend, now thats a bummer on its own to me but it gets worse!

 

Her boyfriend is an abusive (damn wish i could swear), pathetic excuse for a "man". Me and all my mates are only 17 and so is he but hes so abusive to her! Theyve been together for just over a year and as much as it upset me at first i got along well with him becuase hes into computers etc and so am i so we had plenty to alk about. But then he starts making her very upset, but only once or twice so i just ignored it as a tiff and carried on with life but he just kept doing it!! he hasnt stopped, atleast twice a month id say they have some sort of argument and id say once a month she cries (and not becuase its that time of the month either!) because he upsets her.

 

So far hes split up with her 3 times and possibly once more just a few days ago, but every time they take each other back. He is constantly giving her orders too. Its no secret that i have feelings for her, have done for a long time and i understand that he doesnt like that, i dont care whether he likes it or not, but i understand! Anyway we had a sleepover at one of my friends houses just a couple of days ago, obviously he wasnt invited because my mates dont like him either! Loser. Anyway his girlfriend was there and of course we all slept in one room, there was only three of us, me, the girl this whole topic is about (emma) and our mate (nicola). At ths sleepover emma told me that a few days ago steve (the boyfriend) had phoned her and TOLD her never to put her pj's on while she was there and also that she wasnt allowed to sleep in the same room as me. Well she didnt put her PJ's on (no suprises there, she always backs down, idiot!) and we did all sleep in the same room, but when nicola wanted to sleep on the opposite side of the bed to me (i was on the floor) emma was like "nah nah im confy here" blah blah, more and more BS because she didnt want to lay near me incase steve found out because she knows hell have a go at her. And he kept phoning her up which annoyed the living heck out of me and nicola because we both hate him and want him dead, but thats another story. And he kept puttin her in a bad mood becausehe was constantly having a go at her.

 

before this shes had to lie to him about talking to me. I sent him an email the day after the sleepover, a rather sarcy and very cocky one :D which in the end possibly caused their forth break up (i say possibly because she denies they broke up yet they werent talking and she removed all signs of her "i love steve" BS from her msn name. But suprise suprise theyre back together!

 

Im just so annoyed because i wanted to talk to her because i was bored so i texted her for free off the net, no reply. I texted again. i got "not gonna be online x" as a reply...WTF?! i texted again asking if shes ok and suprise suprise no effin reply! Ive just texted her again trying to get a reply, lets see what happens!

 

while i wait let me vent some more, it is afterall what this place is for!

 

I just cant take it! I mean all i want to do now is go and beat 7 shades of poop out of him! and im not even a violent person! But im just so annoyed is doing my brain in! Im typing this and im shaking!! Its crazy!

 

But im not permitted to say anything to him because he takes everything out on her. I am actually afraid that he will hit her one day and i know if he does i wont be able to just sit here and vent about it. ill go mental on him! And it wouldnt suprise me if he raped her, or at the least forced her into having sex. It would devestate me but not suprise me. And nicola thinks so too, and her brother is in a class at college with this steve and he also thinks hes going to hit emma one day. Its just crazy! yet she thinks hes lord almighty emperor of the friggin universe! I know she loves him but as far as im concerned i love her but i wouldnt let her treat me like that! And she and problably steve think that im just jealous. Yes i admit i would love to be emmas boyfriend but im not jealous of him. Im more likely to be jealous of a worm. Or maybe its the same thing! I just cant watch her getting hurt like this, its killing me and it annoys me so much when she doesnt reply to texts, and when i phone her sometimes i get a bored sounding low voiced almost unresponsive mong on the end of the phone, called emma, yet when hes not there i get a perfectly gre4at and funny chat with her and shes one of my best friends but when hes there shes not even allowed to talk to me. Which is shy she still hasnt replied and im getting so annoyed.

 

what can i do? im going mad! i cant say anything to him because everytime i do he takes it out on her and then she gets the ump with me and she normally ends up very upset and i hate upsetting her. I cant just beat the living hell out of him because shed never talk to me again and hes not worth that. I cant talk to her reasonably because all i get is "shut up i dont wanna hear it, hes not that bad, its my fault anyway, im jus stupid and moany blah blah blah " plain BS its because he needs medical help to sort his pea sized brain out!

 

I just need to do something! and i need to calm down too! If anyone has any advice please let me know! im going spare!

 

And theres more to this story but i havent got time to tell it nor the space on the webserver for the size of my post!

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Man dude, kinda a messy situation. My idea would be to tell her your true feelings. If she says no or watever move on and still be friends. Theres more fish in the sea like they always say. Even if her boyfriend seems abusive maybe there is a real reason of why they are still together. Just my thoughts, hope it helps.

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Yeh, i have kind of moved on but i still have feelinhs for her, it just really annoys me that im loosing her as a friend because of him but she cant see it. It just does my head in! Whay cant she see it?! I would never let anyone treat me like that hes an abusive person and she doesnt deserve it!

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Yeh, i have kind of moved on but i still have feelinhs for her, it just really annoys me that im loosing her as a friend because of him but she cant see it. It just does my head in! Whay cant she see it?! I would never let anyone treat me like that hes an abusive person and she doesnt deserve it!



Love is blind and women think that can "fix" us men. Can't fix us, can only train us to not wet on the floor. She should dump him. If she were my daughter and I knew what he was doing to her, I'd be in jail as I beat the living sh*t out of him.

Anyway, if she is not willing to listen, you cannot force her too. Just be there when her world falls apart.

Good luck.

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Bro, sorry, but nice guys finish last. Believe me, I just went through the same thing.Obviously can't see the better guy and is attracted to the stupid things. Theres not much you can do about it though, either suck it up and stop being so nice.. Or keep being nice and maybe you'll meet someone who understands that someone's kindness should not be taken as their weakness.

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If I were you I would just tell her how you feel and see if she feels the same way if not then I'm afraid you'll have to stay friends I'm sorry but that's the only advice I can give you.-redfacedgirl

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