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William91

Loving Someone On The Internet?

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One of these major things that happend on the net all the time is on many only games there are several people who claim to love each other but they say they dont know each other in real life. I have a good question, how the heck is it possible to love someone on the internet that you do not know, have never seen their face, never even been with them in real life. Just about every game I play theres some wedding for people getting fake marriages but they don't even know each other!Its like going up to a total stranger you do not know and asking them to marry you. I can't believe how many people don't really know what love is. Love is a a lot more serious thing then most people think. You may "like" someone on the net but when your just reading their posts and such, how do you get to know them much?All you basically know is a tiny bit about maybe 5% of their true personality. Im very shy in real life, you would have never known that if I didn't tell you that. What are your opionions about "Loving"someone on the internet?

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My ideas are similar in this case!Even I dont understand that how can a person know so much about the other person on the internet itself...It's fine if they actually meet through internet and then get to meet physically and then they fall in love but without meeting anyone..??? That's kinda funny and stupid!I think it is just infatuation and nothing else and I think that is the reason why there are so many divorce cases these days!

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One of these major things that happend on the net all the time is on many only games there are several people who claim to love each other but they say they dont know each other in real life. I have a good question, how the heck is it possible to love someone on the internet that you do not know, have never seen their face, never even been with them in real life. Just about every game I play theres some wedding for people getting fake marriages but they don't even know each other!Its like going up to a total stranger you do not know and asking them to marry you. I can't believe how many people don't really know what love is. Love is a a lot more serious thing then most people think. You may "like" someone on the net but when your just reading their posts and such, how do you get to know them much?All you basically know is a tiny bit about maybe 5% of their true personality. Im very shy in real life, you would have never known that if I didn't tell you that. What are your opionions about "Loving"someone on the internet?


Well, from what I get personally, I have an odd feeling that, although many people tend to cheat on the net, some of them happen to express true emotions they wouldn't convey even to to their closest relatives or friends. I suspect it all comes from anonymity, let's call it that.

I'm quite surprised to get to know at times that girls (I haven't had that for boys) will tell me on private talks on the net that they have been raped, without any poking of mine. Now, is it true, really, I dunno. But somehow, I guess some people need to vent out what load they have on their mind. It's a cold, cold world out there, you know.

Now, I ask : are you sure, I mean *DAMN* sure, that the person you meet in actuality, ie in The REAL world, is REAL? I've had opportunities to suspect that fakery is as common a pratice in the REAL world as in the virtual one. A sobering thought, at best.

Cheers! :lol:

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I have a friend who married someone she had met in EverQuest. They shared a lot in common and then one day decided to meet. They hit it off and they've been married for 2 (hmm 3?) years now.I can't imagine how someone care fall in love without physically meeting. As stated, you have no idea who a person is online until you actually spend time with them.People getting married in game is very very different than in the real world. I like seeing in-game weddings, it adds to the rp feeling of the artificial land, which I imagine is what they're trying to accomplish or perhaps to have a good laugh. Don't take anything that happens online seriously, it's all for fun where there are no risks.

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I think that meeting someone online is okay but marrying them online is just a game. If you marry someone online you know it's not real and you have no real commitment to this person. I think some people will share things a lot more easily online than they will face to face. This can be a real asset in starting a relationship. Also, it's easier to hide things about personal appearance and personality traits when talking online. There would be a point in the online relationship where hopefully at least one of the people would want to meet in person. Then you can make a decision on whether or not you want to marry them.

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I learned my lesson the hard way with this topic. I do not believe that it is possible to actually fall in love with someone over the internet. You can feel very close to someone, you can share things and become great friends, but it's just impossible to feel real, true love for someone that you've never been in the presence of. It's so easy to hide things, sometimes people don't even realize that they are doing it. Most people wouldn't think to tell someone over the internet that they make some annoying sound when they chew or that their snoring is louder than an airplane taking off. Those seem like petty things, but they really do add up. Also (at the risk of sounding like someone from the 70's) there's such a thing as getting a "Vibe" from a person. Sometimes you just don't feel right around people that you meet and it really turns into a sticky situation when you've professed your love to someone online and then they wind up creeping you out in person.

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I learned my lesson the hard way with this topic. I do not believe that it is possible to actually fall in love with someone over the internet. You can feel very close to someone, you can share things and become great friends, but it's just impossible to feel real, true love for someone that you've never been in the presence of.
It's so easy to hide things, sometimes people don't even realize that they are doing it. Most people wouldn't think to tell someone over the internet that they make some annoying sound when they chew or that their snoring is louder than an airplane taking off. Those seem like petty things, but they really do add up. Also (at the risk of sounding like someone from the 70's) there's such a thing as getting a "Vibe" from a person. Sometimes you just don't feel right around people that you meet and it really turns into a sticky situation when you've professed your love to someone online and then they wind up creeping you out in person.



I agree with everything you've said... I think it's kinda weird to think you're in love with someone you've never seen in real life. But then again, if you always go on webcam or talk on the phone or whatever, it gets more real. I mean if you only IM like once a month and then you think you're in love that's just weird. But if you've been talking for aaaaaages and on the phone/webcam etc.. why not? I agree with the vibe thing too lol. You can't really know peoples' mannerisms unless you meet them in real life.

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Now, I ask : are you sure, I mean *DAMN* sure, that the person you meet in actuality, ie in The REAL world, is REAL? I've had opportunities to suspect that fakery is as common a pratice in the REAL world as in the virtual one. A sobering thought, at best.



I second that thought, totally. It was my immediate reaction when I read what the orignial poster had to say. I can imagine a lot of people finding the concept of falling in love in a chatroom wierd, but I think falling in love with someone you've met for a couple of months is just as wierd, if not more. Sometimes I think I understand people I've never met a lot better than people I've actually met - I mean, there is a lot more you can pack into a few long e-mails even when compared to broken conversations over a period of a few years. I am not sure about love, but I have a lot of good friends I've never met, and I don't find that unnatural. It is about as unnatural as having real friends, if you want me to put it that way :lol:

The whole love thing goes way above my head in general, so I suppose I'll not even go there.

Cheers!

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I agree with everything you've said... I think it's kinda weird to think you're in love with someone you've never seen in real life. But then again, if you always go on webcam or talk on the phone or whatever, it gets more real. I mean if you only IM like once a month and then you think you're in love that's just weird. But if you've been talking for aaaaaages and on the phone/webcam etc.. why not? I agree with the vibe thing too lol. You can't really know peoples' mannerisms unless you meet them in real life.


The guy that I met, we emailed each other several times everyday for about a year and a half. Huge emails. We talked on the phone a couple of times but it was a little awkward, I thought maybe it was because we were both nervous- but we really didn't 'gel' on the phone or "in real life." I think mostly I fell into a game, there was nothing really real about it at all. I did a lot of soul searching afterwards and I realized that I was trying to get out of a situation in my life more than I was interested in him. And it was probably the same thing for him.

That was from 1998-2000. Afterwards, I decided to do things "normally" :lol: I still talked to people online, but I kept a certain amount of distance for quite a while. Until about a year ago, I guess. I started making an effort to get to know some people a little better that I had been on messages boards with for several years. There's one guy (who lives on the other side of the world) that I've chatted with almost everyday for the last year. (He's sent me pictures and video of himself so I know what he's like in that respect. :P ) We've also talked on the phone a couple of times in the last month. It's been going along very, very slowly compared to how some people do things, I do "like" like him, but I won't go so far as to start throwing around serious words. So, anyway, we've talked about meeting a few times and I have decided to go meet him. That will happen in a few months so, let's see what happens this time.

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I think you can get to know about how the other person you are communicating with tru inet, is without being distracted by his/her looks. Often people attempt to fall in love with the outside and not the inside of a person. But then again, you can never tell if the person is real, or just hides his real personality from you. So, I don't think you can get to know a person and fall in love with that person only tru internet. I mean, i think it will only happend to a few people that will meet after internetting and be with eachother for a long time. But most of the time, I don't think a relation ship will work. Cause you can't get to know the other, 100%. So if you meet and the rest of the thing you didn't knew about that person are positive, it may have a chance. But I don't think it goes that way very often.

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I dunno... it's fun to meet people online, and I have one good friend in particular who I talk to in great depth, for hours, nearly every night... but I still wouldn't want to 'date' him, since he lives halfway across the state and it'd be weird.That, and I have a wonderful b/f IRL, already, haha XDAnd that, really, was the reason I was going to reply. My boyfriend had to move out of town (to take a couple classes at a different college) for 9 months, and so, for the first time since I met him, he lived hours away, instead of minutes. I'm taking 19 credit hours in college, and have a full-time job, so I was lucky to see him once a month, IRL. We're both computer people, so we kept in contact over IMs every night, and it was -weird-. Although he's very smart, he types newbishly, in a way that normally makes me assume the other person is a child.. his personality is very feminine, and he just acts different overall. It all seemed quite ackward, for the most part, and strangely, it made me think... had I met him and got to know him online, without ever meeting him IRL, I wouldn't have hardly given him a second glance. Yet now that he's back in town (just moved back about two weeks ago ^^!), everything is lovely, just like it was before. It really made me think, though.. that my 'favorite person ever' IRL could seem so different when we were forced to chat just in IMs and emails. I wonder if my favorite people online would seem as appealing IRL, then o.o

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Ok, so I don't really know much about love but as for love online. I don't think so. Anyone can go around and be a realllllly good friend to you. You can hang out play games and what not, but tell me, are they going to be there when you get hurt? Help you run errands? Give you encouragement in real life or help you when you are saddened? You only know this person's personality through the internet. They could just be messing with you so when you do meet them in real life, they can control you and get what they want. Sure some do work out I am sure but probably not many. A couple months ago a guy and girl fell in love over MySpace. The guy one day decided to come see her and when he did...he killed her family and kidnapped her. Not really love now is it?

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When you get to know someone over the internet, try not to ask for their picture. It might be better just to get to know the person's personality before seeing a picture. Sometimes we judge others by what they look like without wanting to. I used to go on the internet to role playing chatrooms and made a few temporary friends that way. But one day, I made a friend and we really did like each other. One small problem was that the guy was too shy to say anything. I remembered hearing of relationships that didn't happen because both people were too shy to ask each other out so I told the guy I liked him. We already knew each other and voila, we got engaged. We have now been together for almost three years and are getting married soon! He is still very far away but he has visited many times and we talk at least one hour a day on the phone. So true love relationships can happen over the internet. But keep in mind I can smell an online pervert a million miles away just by reading a few typed words (only if the person is speaking directly to me) so I never fell for an online rapist/pedophile/evil person.Basically true love can happen but watch out what you do and if you meet, do it in a public place with a group of friends (even if they are "hiding" in the backround so the person does not know they are there)

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But keep in mind I can smell an online pervert a million miles away just by reading a few typed words (only if the person is speaking directly to me) so I never fell for an online rapist/pedophile/evil person.


However, there are people out there who can still disguse themselves to look just look someone willing interested. Also be aware of those who seem to like you, and tag you along, and you get your hopes up for this person thinking they are so good, and then all you turn out to be is 'abit of fun', usually after you have paid $1,000 plane ticket and travelled 2,000km to meet him/her.

I also have meet my Girlfriend over the internet, we didn't see a picture of each other for months on end, and then she gets out of her 'ex-relationship' which was verbal, and sometimes psyical abuse and asked me out, it wasn't until 2 months later did she get to meet me, and were still going. Anything is possible, but just extra care is needed, and lets face it, the same possiblity is possible by meeting someone in a friend party enviroment. These days its a look out whatever you do...

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We already knew each other and voila, we got engaged. We have now been together for almost three years and are getting married soon! He is still very far away but he has visited many times and we talk at least one hour a day on the phone. So true love relationships can happen over the internet.

Heh, congrats. Hope everything goes well when you start living in the same area... sometimes it's a lot different to be living together, even if you've lived in the same town and hung out together a lot beforehand. ^^You moving closer to him, or is he moving closer to you? :3

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