35 Ways To Annoy People

[OpaQue 15]

35 Ways to Annoy People

 

 

Leave the copy machine set to 99 copies, reduce 200%, extra dark, 17-inch paper.

 

in the memo field of all your checks, write, "for sensual massage."

 

Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

 

If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking with others.

 

Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

 

Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions, "to keep them tuned up."

 

Reply to everything someone says with, "that's what YOU think."

 

Practice making fax and modem noises.

 

Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and copy them to your boss.

 

Make beeping noises when you back up.

 

Finish all your sentences with the words, "in accordance with prophecy."

 

Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears.

 

Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

 

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

 

Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

 

Staple papers in the middle of the page.

 

Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

 

Honk and wave to strangers.

 

Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat the complimentary mints by the cash register.

 

TYPE ONLY IN UPPERCASE.

 

type only in lowercase.

 

dont use any punctuation either

 

Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute entire streets.

 

Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

 

As much as possible, skip rather than walk.

 

Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce, "No, wait -- I messed it up." Then repeat.

 

Ask people what gender they are.

 

While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.

 

Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.

 

Sing along at the opera.

 

Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

 

Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, then scribble their answers in a notebook and mutter something about "psychological profiles."

 

Tell your friends that you can't attend their party, five days prior to the event, because you're "not in the mood."

 

And the final way to annoy people...

 

Source : Email - All copyrights to respected writers

[wassie 0]

Keep bumping up to people you meet and scream you are a chockolate pinquin.(thats also kinda annoying )

[wild20 0]

OpaQue, you have too much much time on your hands. Ever tried any of this? Might be entertaining actually. I will try out that blow dryer one No just kidding. Man, the things people come up with. I would say that someone, or something* have too much time on their hands.I was reading another where you could pay for your dinner with pennies and when in college, glue your shoes to the ceiling and when your room-mate comes in, site there on the ground holding your head . Hey nice stuff OpaQue.

[NNNOOOOOO 0]

I read one where you take a bagless garbage can and put you phone in it. Then you put the can in its side and put it against the wall between your room and your roommate's room (leave the phone on the hook). Now, leave your room and go across town. If you have a cell phone, call the phone in your room. Don't hang up for a couple of minutes or so. Or make the call with a pay phone and walk away without hanging up.

[rpgsearcherz 5]

I think a great way to annoy people is to follow them (act inconspicuous -- meaning like you're a spy). You'll get all sorts of reactions from that.Another is to go on an elevator and face *towards* the other people. It's funny to watch everyone get uncomfortable.Go up to a random couple somewhere (the mall is great, or the movies) and look at the person that's the opposite sex of you (so if you're male, look at the female, or vice versa). Stare directly into their eyes, then look at the person they're with. Look back at them again and yell "So *this* is who you're cheating on me with?! You could at least cheat *up*. It's over!" and walk away.Note : I don't condone the third one because it's been known to destroy relationships. Do it at your own risk.

[anwiii 17]

hmmm it's a good topic, but not really something i need since i seem to annoy people naturally. but if someone is feeling up to it, i think a good way to annoy someone is walk up to someone from behind, smack them in the back of the head and tell them, "your it!"