My Funny Jokes

[Batista 0]

A bus crashes full of ugly people. They all go to heaven. God says they have one wish each. The first one wishes he is beautiful. The man at the back of the line laughs for a bit. The second one wishes the same as the first one. The man at the back laughs again. This goes on until it comes the the guy at the end who is rolling with laugher. God says him "what do you wish for?". He says "for all the people who wished to be beautiful to be ugly again".woman?s husband comes home hammered every night and she always yells at him before going to bed alone.One day she decides to try some reverse psychology. When her husband staggers in that night, she?s waiting for him in her best lingerie. She sits him in an armchair and gives him a backrub.?It?s getting late, big boy,? she says after a few minutes. ?Why don?t we go upstairs to bed.??We might as well,? slurs the husband. ?I?m going to be in trouble when I get home, anyway.?NOTE: this ones kinda hard to get, but if u dont get it, just think about it for a second. I got it after a while and lmao. if u still dont get it, askTwo happy men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm, and then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are crying and screaming. Over in the corner, one is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by and to the gays' delight she points out the happy child as theirs. "Isn't it wonderful?" one <<removed>> says to the other. "All these unhappy children and ours is so happy." The nurse says, "Oh sure, he's happy now. But just watch what happens when we take the pacifier out of his *bottom*

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Edited October 22, 2005 by BuffaloHELP (see edit history)

[chuya 0]

A bus crashes full of ugly people. They all go to heaven. God says they have one wish each. The first one wishes he is beautiful. The man at the back of the line laughs for a bit. The second one wishes the same as the first one. The man at the back laughs again. This goes on until it comes the the guy at the end who is rolling with laugher. God says him "what do you wish for?". He says "for all the people who wished to be beautiful to be ugly again".

womans husband comes home hammered every night and she always yells at him before going to bed alone.

 

One day she decides to try some reverse psychology. When her husband staggers in that night, shes waiting for him in her best lingerie. She sits him in an armchair and gives him a backrub.

 

Its getting late, big boy, she says after a few minutes. Why dont we go upstairs to bed.

 

We might as well, slurs the husband. Im going to be in trouble when I get home, anyway.

 

NOTE: this ones kinda hard to get, but if u dont get it, just think about it for a second. I got it after a while and lmao. if u still dont get it, ask

 

Two happy men decide to have a baby. They mix their sperm, and then have a surrogate mother artificially inseminated. When the baby is born, they rush to the hospital. A dozen babies are in the ward, eleven of whom are crying and screaming. Over in the corner, one is smiling serenely. A nurse comes by and to the gays' delight she points out the happy child as theirs. "Isn't it wonderful?" one fruitcake says to the other. "All these unhappy children and ours is so happy." The nurse says, "Oh sure, he's happy now. But just watch what happens when we take the pacifier out of his *bottom*

197312[/snapback]

The first one was pretty funny ^^. The husband in the second one deserves to be castrated by the wife. And the last one I found a little disturbing...

[sangdukseo 0]

um, the last one was just disturbing. Not a good joke. The first one was a good laugh. But everytime I see the first one, i see the last one, and i'm just like, wowa, not cool.