safin

Christianity and Islam are like two different rivers with a same destined ocean. They both have external differences but eventual destination is the almighty creator – Allah. Often my wife makes fun that as a Muslim I can easily marry two or more women. Actually the purpose of this writing is not to prove the people’s knowledge about Islam wrong – but to exhibit the true meaning of a ‘Wife’ from the Islamic point of view.
By getting married I am not just getting a wife, but I am getting my whole world (My world is 200 lbs hehehe…). From now until the rest of my days my wife will be my partner, my companion, and my best friend.

She will share my moments, my days, and my years. She will share my joys and sorrows, my successes and failures, my dreams and my fears. When I am ill, she will take the best care of me; when I need help, she will do all she can for me.
(Don’t mind if she is sharing food, she needs extra right?).

When I have a secret (I don’t have any for the moment), she will keep it; when I need advice, she will give me the best advice. She will always be with me: when I wake up in the morning the first thing my eyes will see will be hers; during the day, she will be with me, if for a moment (a moment can be 10 hrs or more) she is not with me by her physical body, she will be thinking of me, praying for me with all her heart, mind, and soul; when I go to sleep at night, the last thing my eyes will see will be hers; and when I am asleep I will still see her in my dreams. In short, she will be my whole world and I will be her whole world.

The best description that I personally have ever read describing the closeness of the spouses to each other is the Qur'anic verse which says: "they are your garments and you are their garments" (Al- Quran - Surah Al Baqarah 2:187). Indeed, spouses are like garments to each other because they provide one another with the protection, the comfort, the cover, the support, and the adornment that garments provide to humans. Just imagine a journey in the winter of Alaska without garments! Our spouses provide us with the same level of comfort, protection, cover, and support in the journey of our lives on this earth as garments would do in the Alaskan journey.

The relationship between the spouses is the most amazing of all human relations: the amount of love and affection, intimacy and closeness, mercy and compassion, peace and tranquility that fills the hearts of the spouses is simply inexplicable. The only rational explanation for these most amazing of all human feelings is that: it is an act of Allah, "And Allah has made for you Mates (and Companions) of your own nature..." (Surah Al Nahl 16:72) Only our Almighty Allah in His Infinite Power, Boundless Mercy, and Great Wisdom can create and ingrain these amazing and blessed feelings in the hearts of the spouses. Allah says in the Qur'an, "And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect." (Surah Al Rum 30:21)

I know I should Never underestimate the importance of seemingly little things as putting food in your wife's mouth, opening the car's door for her, let her eat fatty and creamy food even if I know its not good for her 200 lbs etc. Always try your best to be good to your wife by words and by deeds. Talk to her, smile to her, seek her advice, ask for her opinion, spend quality time with her and always remember that the Prophet Salallaahu 'Aliahi Wa'sallaam (SAW) said "the best of you are those who are best to
their wives."

Finally, it is common that spouses vow to love and honor their spouses until death do them part. I do believe that this vow is good or even great, but not enough! It is not enough that I love my wife. I have to love what she loves as well. Her family, her loved ones must also become my loved ones. it is not enough that I will love her until death do us apart. Love should never end and we do believe there is life after death where those who did righteousness in this world will be joined by their spouses (Surah Al Zukhruf 43:70) and offsprings.

So please love your wife even if she is 200 lbs and she can’t stop eating more and more fatty and creamy foods, even if she gets mad at you if you stop her to spend extra for cosmetics and under-garments, even if she never cooks for you or even she is always busy talking in phone in week-ends and attending gatherings when you expect her to spend quality time with you. Remember, a 200 lbs wife is a Almighty’s blessing and you must accept it.